So Angry

[funnygrl]

Long story long...my ex and I broke up a few months ago. It was great in the beginning, but then it got messed up, he had issues and I had issues and we just reacted badly to each other. We broke up and he shortly started dating someone else and told me that he wanted a realtionship so badly, and maybe she was "better" for him. Needless to say I was devastated.

 

We became friends, and then months later one night he starts telling me how much he misses me and thinks about me all of the time, how he is so sorry he hurt me and he wasn't happy at the time and thereforeeee couldn't give me what I wanted in a relationship. He then tells me that he is starting to not be happy w/his new girlfriend either. He said he was confused. I told him I would be there for him as a friend while he tries to work things out. I told him I wanted to try and give things another chance w/us and he said he was confused and had to work things out.

 

A few days later we spoke on the phone and he became very rude to me and tells me that he felt guilty he told me those things and it was a mistake, and that he and his new gf have a "different" kind of relationship than we had, that he really cares for her and they are trying to work things out, but that is between him and her and its none of my business. Which is very true, but so harsh! Why bring me into it in the first place then?!?!

 

We got into a big argument because he was so rude to me, and now he says that he doesn't think we should be friends, we should go our separate ways, because he has trouble being "just" friends w/me. Am I wrong for being so mad and hurt? I really care for him and wanted to stay friends, but now everything is so messed up. What should I do?

[FierceDeity]

It sounds like you should really just avoid him. A guy can say anything but that does not mean you should take it to heart.

 

Months later when he started talking again it could have been because things were not working out with his girlfriend, people fear loneliness. He says things are bad with her, so if it ended, would you really want to go out with a guy who had just been confused over another girl?

 

You are not wrong to be hurt. It sounds like he used you because he was having a difficult time and when he felt better he lost the need to want to talk. Its a bit difficult being friends with an ex, especially when there are feelings still involved.

 

Think about yourself and keep your distance from him for now.

[thoughts]

It's unfair to his new girlfriend for you to contact him. If he contacts you, let him know he shouldn't and leave it at that.