what the heck does "finding urself" really mean anyway?

[itry]

how do u know? i hear all these great stories or journeys of "i found myself" or "i need to find myself". what the hell does that mean? i know its a metaphor. but does finding urself mean, being comfortable with urself? or is it something deeper? does finding urself mean, not being so confused anymore because i know what u want?

 

who here has "Found Themselves"?

 

that expression irks me to no end because i dont understand it...which leads me to believe that i havent found myself?...even though i know where i am?

[DN]

I think it means that when you are growing up, you are 'molded' so to speak by other people. Parents, siblings, teachers etc., as well as by yourself. You learn attitudes, behaviors from other people. At some point in your life, you go through the process of sorting through all that has gone to influence you, some of it contradictory. You discard what does not make sense to you, or think more deeply about what does.

 

At the end of the process, you are now a fully-formed adult, with your own opinions, your own set of beliefs and are now capable of making judgments based on what you think rather than what on others have taught you to think.

 

Some people never go through that process.

 

Of course, that does not mean that you ever stop learning or seeking knowledge.

[cinderelly]

i think finding yourself means coming to terms with who you are. liking yourself being able to be happy alone, not needing others to make you happy.

[summer_in_greece]

Finding yourself means finding your purpose and meaning in life. My purpose in life is to serve the community by protecting it (through policing, and other indirect methods. Everyone's life as a purpose. Your duty is to find out what it is, and then live out that purpose the best you are able to.

[skyjuice]

Hi

 

I am still searching too. Good luck in finding yourself.

[Zerohero]

I think I'm really close to finding it. The search started my jr year in HS, and it's gone well since. No longer do I try to fit in with the in crowed. I just be myself, and life has gotton better because of it. Although I still suffer from my own thoughts from time to time. At least I'm know I'm being true myself as much as possible.

[NR498E]

about 3yrs ago i quit a very well paying job,bailed out of my apartment,cashed out my savings(about$4000)and moved to Colorado for the summer.I wasnt happy at my job and there were a few personal issues i was somewhat depressed about.I felt i needed time to myself to figure out where my life was headed and what my purpose was.Well after 4 crazy months i returned home dead broke.I had no job,no money and was forced to move back in with my parents.But i felt great, i felt for the first time in my life i knew what i wanted.I decided that i wanted a steady job that i liked, i wanted to marry the love of my life and have a family in the suburbs, amongst other things.which was along way from were i was at.Well 4 months ago the love of my life left me i was and still am crushed.I since quit my job and am starting all over again.Yet what i concluded out in Colorado still is what i want in life. i just guess itll be wit a different woman.anyhow, 3yrs ago i did in fact find myself and my purpose. its not going exactly according to plan but what does?I know what im gonna do with my life and in alot of ways i guess you never really stop finding yourself.

[skyjuice]

Hi Andy,

 

Good luck in finding yourself and a job.

[OmegaMan]

I´ve often wondered..

 

In my opinion, finding yourself is a never ending process. You get closer and closer to it with time.

Omega

[Heartless01]

how do u know? i hear all these great stories or journeys of "i found myself" or "i need to find myself". what the hell does that mean? i know its a metaphor. but does finding urself mean, being comfortable with urself? or is it something deeper? does finding urself mean, not being so confused anymore because i know what u want?

 

who here has "Found Themselves"?

 

that expression irks me to no end because i dont understand it...which leads me to believe that i havent found myself?...even though i know where i am?

 

Interesting topic!

 

(A newbie chimes in, oh no!)

 

Finding Yourself.....

 

I believe it means different things to different people. So, slot me in the "*CENSORED**CENSORED**CENSORED* does that mean?" camp.

 

I have seen those who use that as an excuse or cover for nothing but selfishness. Leaving family behind in the process. There were many types of documented popular culture movements in history that promoted such ideas and failed to include moderated critical thinking in decision making.

 

(did that even make sense?)

 

I am a simplistic person for the most part. I feel that so long as I cause no damage to others, make the honest attempt to be a good person or at least correct the absense of such, and give my children the tools they need to be good people then I have done the finding me thing.

 

It means I know what I am, and deal with life in a balanced (not perfect) manner. It means I am not ashamed of the things I do for fun or work. That I can accept others disagreement or approval without being defensive. It is security in myself....

 

Opinion only....thanks.

[southpaw]

Probably as good a place as any (in finding yourself) to start "looking" is in your relationship with solitude. Are you comfortable when you're completely alone and with out the busy distraction of friends and technology? If not, it might be interesting to figure out how to be.

[lainOS]

I think finding yourself is ALL of the things mentioned above. I think everyone's opinion is great and not to be contrasted with another's, but to be added together

i think to find yourself is to learn what you want in life and to have your opinions, preferences and desires/goals in life, (from small ones to large), based on YOUR intellect, knowledge and discernment of what's best for you and will make you happy. (is that that the right word? discernment?)

 

but that's only the first step, it's not complete until you are BEING yourself. actualizing and living by what you know, acting on and living by what you feel and want. and it takes a certain strength to do that. the strength of independence from others, whether family or lovers or friends. when you NEED others enough to sacrifice your desires for yourself, or your authenticity, to yourself and others, whether it be for approval, acceptance, love, security, you haven't made it yet.

 

yea know i think in just writing this, It's finally became more concrete to me. I've constant asked myself the same question, what is finding yourself, knowing who you are, etc. holy epiphany!

[easyguy]

Perhaps it means not just standing on the train that moves, but keeping an eye out for a comfortable seat to sit on as it goes from place to place.

[CaptainPlanet]

Finding yourself is a term that people use when they have too many choices and privilleges.

 

It basically means when you stop having childish dreams.

[lainOS]

sounds like a pretty bitter outlook. and not correct, i dont have a priviledge in the world. and i still know i need to "find myself"

[flgirl777]

i am right there with you! still learning more about myself everyday - maybe one day ill find myself too.

 

Amanda