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itry

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Everything posted by itry

  1. *sigh* like i said...if theres nothing to hide...then share the pw with ur significatn other. thats exactly what i had done....we had pictures together on myspace and our name was "(My name) & (his name)" some guys even had the audacity to hit on me...and i would just ignore them..or my guy would respond. but yeah...those kind of sites arent something u should keep to urself if ur not doing anything wrong at all.
  2. HOLY GOD that was so insulting to read. I think if anyone handed me a book in reference to my daughter on "How to train dogs" i'd punch them clear in the face. I dont like people's assumptions of "bad parenting skills". EVERY kid is different.... every parent is different. each situation is unique. and to be honest..i hate that there are so many excuses for why people behave the way they behave. when people saw my daughter with me and my age...without even knowing the whole situation..they automatically assume im incompetent. i hate that. bad parenting skills my foot....argh
  3. hey...my 4yr old was the same way... a PERFECT angel at daycare/preschool...and a complete nut at home. im a single mom so i didnt have any psychiatrists,evaluations etc. etc. but her tantrums were unreal..to the point where i would have to walk away from her so she wouldnt see me start to cry. people tend to think that young single mothers just dont know what the hell they were doing....but at the same time..i was going through a custody case and i felt that this may have been affecting her. anyway....i went to the book store and bought several books..i researched and posted a lot on "link removed" and "How to Behave so Your children will too" was one book that really really helped. i stuck with it...and thank God things are sooo much better..good luck
  4. itry

    Orgasm?

    because women lie! not to hurt their feelings but to get them the hell off of us. its difficult. some women have difficulty reaching orgasm. but if she's satisfied..then she'll be back for more.
  5. i am leaving him for events that occurred last year...it took me a year to i guess realize that i should have left him then. plus also...within this past year..although he has calmed down alot..his insecurities are still there...i just suspect him to be a sleeping volcano.... last year he cheated on me with his sons mother.. it was an on going thing for several months. i guess she suspected that he was still seeing me and confronted me....God i was blown away...i had no clue. i was devestated...but i took him back. even after i realized he was scheming profusley about how to juggle the two of us.... plus...the early years of the relationship..he has thrown me accross the room...spit on me..broke my things out of jealousy and was damn near close to punching me in the face. like i said..although he is calm now and the past year has been happy for the both of us....i guess i just woke up. we went ring shopping and i just sat there..with all the flashbacks in my head...of how the spit felt on my face...of the hole in my wall...my broken cell phone that he threw against the wall...the memory of the aching in my back when he threw me accross the room and i landed on top of my table..and broke it...the way his hands felt on my neck when he tried to choke me...the degrading words....as the lady was sizing me for the beautiful princess cut diamond engagement ring..and he sat next to me rubbing my back and smiling....i just sat there....with a forced smile...thinking of all of those things.... he HAS calmed down..and regrets it all....cries about..and says he hates himself for it. and like i said..although it has been peachy keen....i just woke up.... how can i stay with him after all that? why would i want to marry someone who did that to me? what if my daughter found out (my daughter isnt his...) and then used that as an excuse to stay with someone who may be no good for her? u know.."mommy..u did it and u stayed with him"...i dont think i could forgive myself. i had a flash back of all of that....granted it was a little over a year ago....and maybe i stayed with him because i was still in shock...maybe i thought that i could get over it all. maybe i was feeling so low that i believed that this was it. that theres nothing out there for me..whatever it was...i dont know. we were looking at houses...planning vacations with each others children....attending his family functions together (my family despises him..and i think my mother spends every sunday at church praying for me to leave..) and just one day..i told him i couldnt do it. i couldnt bear to think of how i would feel if i were to see his sons mother even once during his every other weekend visitiatipn knowing they were having unprotected sex together before...then he would sleep with me. i couldnt even look at his son in the face knowing that he knew about it... i couldnt forget the bruises he put on me..i cant erase the hospital record or the police record. i cant and wont risk it happening again. im miserable..i feel guilty and selfish...i will be alone for the holidays... i wil be alone for my birthday...i feel guilty when he cries to me...i feel guilty blocking his calls and not answering emails or texts. i feel guilty for leaving him like this...is that being weak? am i weak for feeling guilty for him? hell...once in a while..i will think to myself...."maybe this will work? i know he DOES love me...i know he does...? i have to force myself to run down the list of things.....then i cry.
  6. have u guys even MET each other?? the only thing this internet relationship has is high speed internet access!!! i think ur choice words of "true-love" is what really bothered the living daylights out of me. *sigh* prepare for ridicule and silent tsk tsk's when it comes to posts like these. nonetheless good luck. feeling good because of another person can't be all bad right?
  7. itry

    Orgasm?

    yep...ive faked it to get a guy to stop. but ive also felt tingly after an orgasm. how come u didnt orgasm? usually i enjoy it more when i sense the guy is enjoying himself also.
  8. ..ive never been married but i have dealt with a divorced man. #1...ur letter was beautiful..it sounded very gentle yet firm and clear with what you are asking for. i think he would interpret it as u want him to be sure that its YOU that he wants to be with..or else time and feelings would end up a waste. if he is as level headed as you seem to be..he will understand ur letter and think about it...long and hard..then he will get back to u. ur letter sounds very sweet...2nd chances are difficult to spot...i hope he doesnt miss it. good luck
  9. do u feel as if ur feelings are being reciprocated? i know that at times ive had conversations with males 10 years my junior and if convos went great...etc. i "understood" them and so forth...then they automatically assumed that i was the greatest thing since sliced bread..only for me to bring them back to reality...and say "hey kid....uhh..i was just conversing..thats all". not saying that thats how she feels...but like the other poster said...see where her head's at. spend some time. strange things can happen. i mean hey...look at Ashton and Demi? but then again...he's like a freaking stallion...a super rich stallion lol good luck!!
  10. ...all i would like to say is that....years from now..u too will be asking a moderator how to delete this forum that you had posted...
  11. how do u know? i hear all these great stories or journeys of "i found myself" or "i need to find myself". what the hell does that mean? i know its a metaphor. but does finding urself mean, being comfortable with urself? or is it something deeper? does finding urself mean, not being so confused anymore because i know what u want? who here has "Found Themselves"? that expression irks me to no end because i dont understand it...which leads me to believe that i havent found myself?...even though i know where i am?
  12. in my opinion..sex WAS about hormones. after all.. thats what us humans were originally designed for. some animals give off a scent indicating its time to mate, some use bright colors, others use sound....humans.. use hard on's or natural lubrication triggered by our endocrine system. have we evolved from primates to now enjoy sex when strong feelings of intimacy are involved? yep. in fact.. our brains are getting bigger...forming new layers in due time. we have gained knowledge…conception and most importantly..we have gained reason. To say sex is just hormonal is immature and careless…and pretty primitive. like a lot of polygamous communities. most of the people on this board are single or distressed… why? because we crave the love intertwined with monogamy, other people here… theyre the ones who cant handle monogamy and are looking for answers as to why..
  13. oh God...i went through the exact mirror situation.... 3.5 years ago. i was the one that actually broke it off with him just this week. i mean...there are so many variables...but with my divorced (ex) bf...he wanted me to be the future wife...but slowly and surely...i began to see why he was divorced. i think it depends on a lot of things. just go with the flow...theres no exact science to tell what will happen. keep ur guard up though...but be there for him. for him to be mixing u with the kids should be a good sign.... but be wary....my ex was sooo back and forth with me in the beginning...just this year he was sure that i was the "one" (the 2nd one anyway...) but there were issues there that i couldnt spot at first... hindsight vision is always 20/20 be cautious in how u deal with the kids also. that gets pretty messy. if ur up for dealing with the ex wife and the kids that arent yours...then do it cautiously. u will be walking on eggshells for awhile
  14. oh hell no. get out of that situation. #1 its not healthy #2 ull be delusional #3 u sound more mature than him. find urself a MAN...not a boy. he'll just keep hurting/using u more. from what it sounds like...there's nothing there from him anymore except a good time. since u are his only friend..he will use that as much as he can..if u let him. kick him to the curb. i know its hard...but think about u first. good luck
  15. itry

    Anal Sex

    its going to hurt like hell...u will bleed and maybe catch a hemmorrhoid. and whats with him being ur "friend"? have u guys done anything else besides "making out"? trust ur gut...i dont think id be letting my "friend" anal ravage me...for that kind of pain..the guy has to be worth it
  16. 2b honest, id probably get mine a bottle of vodka w. some pills attached. but..hey..thats just me =) i DO have another ex that ive kept in contact w. we're pretty close. but out of respect 4 his gf, all i get him is a card. i guess it depends on a lot of variables
  17. yeah but dre...look where she's from... Oklahoma . i dont think she was being offensive... people only speak of what they know. hell..if my friend came to me and said "hey...im reallllllyyyy in love with this sheep...gosh the sex is great!!" i think id be mortified and sloooowlllyyyy back away. its just NOT something i see every day! NOR is it NOT something thats ACCEPTED AND PRACTICED where im from...maybe in the South, Midwest, Central, Rockies regions, sheep sex is like i dunno... a friday club night...but u cant get upset for someones isolated views.
  18. i live in NY and its pertty common here. and the previous poster is right.. i think it depends where ur from. ull get flack... hell... im asian and i got flack for it. just shrug it off... depending how both of u react to it will depend on the strength of the relationship. why not talk about it? im sure he feels the same....
  19. just broke it off monday... doing the NC thing.. ick.. and im actually sticking to it. it was a lonnngggg 3.5yr relationship.. where i should have left the first time he kicked my ass.. buuuuuuuuttt i didnt. it took the 3rd time and a year later for me to leave... anyways... im actually disgusted... i think about kissing him and i wanta puke and cry at the same time. ive lost almost all of my friends just from being isolated from the for so long... im too embarrassed to call anyone for "moral support" because all i will hear are the "i told u so's" im not used to being alone. it feels weird.... i havent called him though.. and blkd emails and calls... im at a safe place... (back at mommy's) BUT i have this weird urge to pull out old pics.. old love letters and reminisce. hello?? its only been a couple of days... is that even safe to do?? or will the emotional overload catapult me back into his awaiting fists..i mean arms? is there EVER a safe time to reminisce in a situation like this? i cant sleep.
  20. ARGH dont do it!! she sounds like me.... trust me. NOT a good idea....i JUST broke up with mine...and we've broke up several times b4 due to trust. the sex just dilutes the reasons..and purty soon..ull be back to square one. go grab a porn and a bottle of lube or something
  21. thats RayKay and Poco... thanks u guys. i think the fact that im utterly numb from the "whining" helps.... i will use Broken Record technique because NC is probably not going to work since his parents live down the block... he'll survive.....i HAVE started deleting the msgs because..its eery...ive heard them ALL in the past. i feel creul leaving him..but thats what he wants me to feel. im tired of babysitting a 34year old...im too young for this drama... thx everyone else. 4 the words. easier said than done...but i think..this time..im actually one of thos people on enotalone who will actually take the good advice given
  22. As many times as i have tried to leave this disfunctional reslationship of mine, he must have threatened death, misery and self-loathe on me dozens of times. there comes a time when all i can do is laugh at his tears...not because im a spiteful b-i-t-c-h but becasue I HAVE HEARD IT A HUNDRED TIMES! and each time, ive come back...only to experience "good-times" for about..ohhh...i dunno..a month or so? and then back to the same B.S. of "why are u wearing that? u cant wear a skirt out!! if u wear a skirt out then ur looking for attention!!" or "who are u on the other line with? why is he calling you?? did u ever sleep with him??" or "THERES NO way that u were studying for 2hours!! people dont do that!!" UGH. if its not one thing its another. i tried to comfort him, with his depression...but he'll gamble away his money or spend on STUPID things then cry about being broke afterwards. He's gotten violent....ok..its eased up now..but geez...i think itll start up again later on...he's CHEATED ON ME UGHHHH and i found out through the other girl. I AM TRYING TO LEAVE HIM BUT HE HAS LEFT ME 7 VOICE MAILS, SEVERAL INSTANT MESSAGES AND TEXT MESSAGES AND I THINK HE WILL TRY TO SEE ME LATER ON TODAY. EACH VOICE MAIL IS SAD, WEEPY AND SUICIDAL. IN CONTRAST TO HIS INSTANT MESSAGES WHICH ARE NASTY AND HURTFUL AND HIS TXT MESSAGES ARE A MIXTURE. HE SAID I AM CRUEL AND NEVER LOVED HIM TO LEAVE HIM RIGHT BEFORE THE HOLIDAYS AND RIGHT BEFORE MY BIRTHDAY. HE SAYS I MUST BE SEEING SOMEONE ELSE THEN. I CANT TAKE MORE OF THIS AND IM AFRAID IF HE FINDS OUT THAT IM USING HIS VOICE MAILS FOR AMUSEMENT HE WILL PROBABLY THROW ME ACCROSS THE ROOM OR SPIT ON MY FACE. WHAT DO I DO????
  23. i know what u mean. im going through a round-a-bout cycle. im TRYING to break out of it but its just not happening...i feel like i have to cut it off for good becasue i know he'll talk me back into it. ull get to a point where u are just fed up..and fed up is probably a light analysis of what u will feel before u let it go. dont put urself to that drama. ...i suck at taking my own advice though
  24. this was actually the only thing that worked.... i slept on my sofa... something about my bed is just too sentimental... thank u... i finally slept decent last night. the first time in over a week...,
  25. yep...i like playing submissive. love it love it love it. ropes and all as far as the dirty talk ... love it love it love it love it too me and my ex were introduced into all of this during our relationship. out of the women he had been with and the men that i had been with, we were each others sexual compatibilty. i dont think id be able to find another man like he was in bed. it was just so....... *sigh* ... alright..let me shut up before i break NC
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