The ex is already seeing someone?!?

[jdheinold]

Hi All...again

 

I recently found out that my ex gf is already seeing someone...3 weeks after she left me! i really do love her, and yearn to be with her, and i am going through a period of nc at the moment, but the thought of her not being hurt after breaking up with me, and finding someone so soon is killing me. i have broken nc a couple of times by calling her strictly for business reasons (bills and such) and before i began nc she said there was a very slim chance of us getting back together, because she cares for me as a friend. i would be greatful to be her firend, but i'm not sure that i can ever get over the fact that she seemed to be non affected by what happened. before she left me, i did ask for her forgiveness over what happened (i took her for granted for a long time, which she had come to resent me for...who wouldn't) and she said she doubts she ever could get over that. i need some word of wisdom before i completely break nc, and call her and chat about things. (not about her love life, i don't want to know)

 

thanks all

 

J-D

[DN]

The wise thing to do is not contact her, assume the relationship is over, heal as quickly as you can and then find someone to love who loves you back. And don't try to find out what your ex is doing - tell your friends not to tell you.

[heloladies21]

The break up wasn't your fault so don't blame yourself. And being her friend would be too hard for you. Don't do that. She wasn't that affected by the break up because she didn't really care about you. Once you realize this, you won't want to contact her anymore. Stick to the No Contact, even if it's for business reasons. I'm sure you can find a way around it.

 

Talk to lots of other girls.

[jdheinold]

I don't blame myself for what happened. there were areas of the relationship i messed up in, as did she. right now, i do feel that being her friend will be hard for me, but she has been in my life for almost 6 years, as my best friend and lover. i am using this experience as a time to learn what to do better in my next relationship, but i'm scared to death that my best friend won't be in my life. yes, i do love her, and i do realize that i am no longer her lover. this process is very hard, but i know i can get through it.

 

J-D

[acuraman]

Im sorry to hear that your ex has found someone. Just because she is with someone doesn't mean she doesn't care about you. The guy she is with could be just a rebound guy that she needs to take her mind off of things because that is her way of handling things. Just remember that rebound guys dont last for very long.

[jdheinold]

yeah, thats what i'm hoping for. i guess she had told all her friends (and the one that told me) that she feels 18 again, which to me could be an indicator that it won't last long, but never the less, i am still worried.

 

J-D

[dzadze]

A good friend of mine took one year to forget his ex,

 

Another friend of mine took 3 years .. and were all in our 20's.

 

moving on is hard ....... very very hard