I want to become an individual.

[lillady898]

What types of activities do you personally do alone? Do you have any alone-time rituals?

 

It took a lot for me to admit to myself that I've never been quite independent enough. I'm actually not enough of a loner. There's always been someone hanging around me, hovering over my shoulder, and keeping their eye on me- Whether it was a friend, family member, or boyfriend.

 

But after realizing that I have much more to grow as an individual, I want to break away from other people's thoughts, ideas, actions, etc. But in baby steps. Starting with merely doing activities alone. It is sad though, because I'm not even quite sure on what you can do alone.

 

Anything pertaining to growing as an individual would be greatly appreciated.

[easyguy]

Well, coming from a prospective professional jazz musician, I can tell you ONE thing you can do alone -- countless hours of practicing your instrument.

[MetallicAguy]

Guitar is my favorite.

[DN]

read, listen to music, write a book, sketch, paint, plant a garden, ride a bike, go for a walk, decorate your room, learn a foreign language, take a correspondence course, arrange flowers, build a scale model of something, learn to play a musical instrument, research a topic on the internet, give advice on a relationship forum, create something, re-create something, exercise, improvise . . .

[lonelyandblue]

write in a journal, dream, set goals, learn to cook, learn how to invest money.......

[RayKay]

I have many alone things I do

 

Training (cycling, the gym, yoga) are most often alone, I read, I draw/do my art, I play around online and give out advice lol, I daydream, I plan my goals, I study & educate, I learn & research, expand my my mind, push my body, I travel, I hike, I cook or bake, I veg out and do nothing, or I go and do everything, I run, I plot, I write, I plan, I remember and I strive for something new.

 

Honestly, you can do anything "alone", and you will find that you are not really so alone after all - as you will discover a lot about that person you have been ignoring so long - YOURSELF!

[SkyFire]

Becoming an individual does not mean simply doing things alone. Humans, by nature, are social creatures.

 

Being an individual means never being scared to express your opinions, and following YOUR own ideals. Being an individual means having doing whatever you want to do, rather than conforming to what everyone wants you to do.

 

Growing as an individual goes deeper then that. One cannot grow without conflict. You must have conflict and face fears if you want to grow. A fighter does not become great unless he has real life experience, and unless he faces defeat.

[Celadon]

lillady898, I know what you mean. I've been seeking the same thing. My problem is that I want to do EVERYTHING (read great books, develop my knowledge of jazz, etc.), but end up so scattered that I do nothing and thus do not develop myself.

 

Anyway, I think one thing that helps is to develop one's confidence. Other people are nice to have around because we can lean on them ... but the confident individual knows s/he doesn't HAVE to lean on someone else. It's an option to lean on others, but only one option of many.

 

So I would suggest taking time to reflect on your life regularly through journaling. What ARE you able to do? Take some pleasure out of who you already are as a person. Are you already good at painting, or knitting, or ice hockey?

 

I had some experiences recently where I could have either gotten down on myself about what I am NOT yet able to do, or I could take pride in the skills I have. Obviously, if I got discouraged about how much I have to learn, I'd probably never become independent. But if I'm thankful ... then anything's possible.

 

You could also journal about your daily or weekly experiences. Such as ... what you thought about that story your heard on the news, or the trip to the museum you went on. That helps to develop your opinions, and then you can share them with other people.

 

Good luck & have fun!

[skyjuice]

Hi

 

I agree. Journaling really helps you to understand yourself. It express who you are. When you look back at it after a year or so, you will know that how much you have improve and accomplish.

 

This would indirectly boast your confidence.

[ShySoul]

Everyone is a unique individual. All you need to do is think about who you are and what you like. Then do those things. Being an individual does not mean being alone. It means standing up for what you believe in, voicing your thoughts, and doing what you like to do.