tease her yo please her

[VEN]

yeah teasing on aim isnt great because she wont understand your intentions or tone for example:

 

i like this girl, first time i saw her i was like wow. so anyways we are talking on msn and she asks me if i want to see her maiden bun lol, at that time i didnt know what it was so i said ok...so she showed me her hair lol, talked for a bit and said gtg. later in the week i said "i miss ur bum wannA show it againx?" she didnt really get the 'joke' but maybe its for the best, so she showed me her hair again but in different style and said she was ugly and had no make-up on but i said she looks pretty anyways, then she kept on repeating that she has ugly and had no make-up on and i thought that was funny so i said "you turn me on har har" she didnt like that but couldnt stay mad at me. she just couldn't enterpret my tone of voice or face expression.

 

 

p.s. just replying to first several posts

[bettyboop401]

Just a question about teasing - is it more effective for you guys if you smirk with it or if you smile with it or if you don't show any emotions. They're very different and I was wondering if smirking lessens the flirting value.

 

And on topic - I don't think you NEED to tease to flirt with or get a girl but I think teasing is fun to do. Being a girl I like the witty challenge of teasing back if I'm fast enough, or showing them how good they are if I can't. Usually I can though!

 

Of course it's a personal choice.

 

Betty!

[northernlights]

kimono_girl2, thank you. Finally someone makes sense on here. Interesting, all of this guys supporters are males. Every female I know who have looked at his stuff has come away dispising him. Hey, females are smarter after all.

 

Haha, well you just made all of us gals' day, ShySoul! I have to chime in here. Reading David's stuff always makes me feel like smacking that guy upside on the head. I have to groan outloud at some of the "c0cky funny" lines he advises men to use. And I feel genuine pity for those who worship him and try to imitate his "great advice".

 

I remember one time when he said to "get a girl's email address, not her phone number". If a boy asked me for my email address, I would turn off all potential interest I had in this guy and give him neither my email nor my phone number. David's rationale is that "not looking too interested makes her want you more", but really...what's the fun in chasing someone who's not chasing you back? Psh.

 

On the subject of teasing though...I like to be teased a little by guys, as long as they stay away from beauty, fashion, and weight issues. In my opinion, there is no tactful way to tease a girl about the way she looks, since we girls generally spend a *lot* of time trying to look our best.

 

Oh, but a important warning for you guys: when teasing a girl you want to be more than friends with, try NOT to go down the "aww you're so cute, like a little dog/sister/doll/etc." path. It's okay the first three times, but after a while, it just feels incredibly degrading. It's hard developing feelings for a guy who treats you like a kid, even if it's just teasing! (I broke it off with one guy I was dating just because I couldn't stand how he nicknamed me "little girl" and would call me that on a daily basis. It felt wrong having to kiss a guy who called me that!)

[MetallicAguy]

I never really go for a girl's email address anyway lol, just sounds stupid, it might take her forever to email you back and its lame, why not talk over the phone?

 

This is what all the new guys(who are just learning) tease girls about:

beauty, fashion, and weight issues.

.

 

Yeah, its why its better to tease them if they did something clumsy, holds a pencil weird, etc. Make sure you don't phrase it wrong or you just end up saying something stupid and then you do more harm than good.

[ShySoul]

The option that (without flamming) you annoy us by refusing to accept that any way other then the pure of heart nice guy route isn't an acceptable way to flirt. I'm not saying that your way hasn't worked, but there /are/ other ways that are just as useable and just as acceptable.

 

Why, thanks for the pure heart comment.

 

I'm just voicing my opinion on behalf of all the nice guys with a pure heart. You get plenty of posts on how nice guys finish last, how you have to tease, play games, be a bad boy. I'm just trying to encourage all the guys that they don't have to do that and will still come out ahead. Stick to who they are. And since most of those guys are either shy and won't write, or feel overwhelmed by the guys saying you need to tease, etc.... someone needs to speak for them. Since I'm having success, why not use my story as encouragement for them.

 

And if it annoys you, just ignore my posts. I'm not making any of you respond. You just keep doing it. If you do, I just stick up for myself and what I believe in.

 

Being a girl I like the witty challenge of teasing back if I'm fast enough, or showing them how good they are if I can't. Usually I can though!

 

You can have just a much fun in a witty verbal banter, without the teasing. I know its hard to believe, but it can be done.

 

Haha, well you just made all of us gals' day, ShySoul

 

Just doing my job, ma'am. If you ever need those spirits lifted again, you know where to find me.

 

On the subject of teasing though...I like to be teased a little by guys, as long as they stay away from beauty, fashion, and weight issues. In my opinion, there is no tactful way to tease a girl about the way she looks, since we girls generally spend a *lot* of time trying to look our best.

 

One, when are you girls going to see that you look your best when your not even trying to look good, but are simple your naturally beautiful selfs?

 

Two, this sounds like a challenge. You might think you like teasing now, but once you get a load of my wit and off the wall humor, you'll never go back...

[MetallicAguy]

I'm just trying to encourage all the guys that they don't have to do that and will still come out ahead.

Well, if you had got more than one gf with your "nice guy"-ness maybe these guys your talking about would be encouraged. Just saying. If you got 10+ gf's in your life time I'm pretty sure people would consider trying your ways. Hell more than 1 at least.

[Kitz]

I'm just trying to encourage all the guys that they don't have to do that and will still come out ahead.

Well, if you had got more than one gf with your "nice guy"-ness maybe these guys your talking about would be encouraged. Just saying. If you got 10+ gf's in your life time I'm pretty sure people would consider trying your ways. Hell more than 1 at least.

 

So true!!

Look, like 50 million guys have used the teasing technique and girls had it used on them. And it works. Everyone here is saying how it works for them and how they like it, etc etc, me included. Its obviously weilded alot of results.. Shysoul, can't you just stop dragging this on and admit that yes, obviously, teasing is a very good and capable way of flirting!! Sure, your way might be "nicer" but it isnt the "only" way to do it and so you can stop claiming that you way is THE ONLY good way to do it.. especially since, no offense, seeing as playful, flirty teasing has weilded alot more results than yours.

[northernlights]

Well, if you had got more than one gf with your "nice guy"-ness maybe these guys your talking about would be encouraged. Just saying. If you got 10+ gf's in your life time I'm pretty sure people would consider trying your ways. Hell more than 1 at least.

 

mm...I don't know about that. A guy who has had 10+ girlfriends seems like a major player. I mean, if you're a 22 year old guy and you have had that many girls, it means that you either started dating when you were 10, or that you throw away girlfriends faster than rubbish.

 

I'd prefer my future boyfriend to have not had a boatload of ex-girlfriends.

 

One, when are you girls going to see that you look your best when your not even trying to look good, but are simple your naturally beautiful selfs?

 

Woo that's a tough one there, dear! Part of the fun of being a girl is being able to primp and preen in front of the mirror. Of course, it can be pretty distressing at times if we go too far, but I wouldn't trade the oppurtunity to glamour myself up with anything! (ok, ok, it depends what...

 

Two, this sounds like a challenge. You might think you like teasing now, but once you get a load of my wit and off the wall humor, you'll never go back...

 

Heh, well I'll just have to moniter your posts closely and see then. I like tactful teasing. Not many people can do it, but it can turn out to be fun. As long as I get to throw my own quips back at the guy, of course. Some friendly flirting.

[ShySoul]

Well, if you had got more than one gf with your "nice guy"-ness maybe these guys your talking about would be encouraged. Just saying. If you got 10+ gf's in your life time I'm pretty sure people would consider trying your ways. Hell more than 1 at least.

 

So it's better to have 10+ girlfriends then to have one girlfriend who you end up with for the rest of your life? Cause hopefully thats how things go. I've never wanted girlfriends, never wanted dates. I've only ever wanted love. I'm the guy that ends up with one girl, and gets it right on the first try. Batting 1000, now thats success.

 

Sure, your way might be "nicer" but it isnt the "only" way to do it and so you can stop claiming that you way is THE ONLY good way to do it.. especially since, no offense, seeing as playful, flirty teasing has weilded alot more results than yours

 

Sigh, never said my way was the only way. If anything I've said that very few will understand what I say. But it comes down to goals and motivation. Do you want something that will last? My way gets you there. It's not just me, its in the successful relationships I have seen. Do you want lots of dates, go ahead and tease. But don't be surprised if things don't work out. Maybe you'll end up with a 5% success ratio. I'll end up with 100%.

 

Woo that's a tough one there, dear! Part of the fun of being a girl is being able to primp and preen in front of the mirror. Of course, it can be pretty distressing at times if we go too far, but I wouldn't trade the oppurtunity to glamour myself up with anything! (ok, ok, it depends what...

 

Far be it for me or other guys to deny women that pleasure. And we appreciate your glamour. Though no amount of makeup or the right dress will make you as beautiful as you are after waking up beside you, your hair a mess, just you in your natually beautiful state.

 

Heh, well I'll just have to moniter your posts closely and see then. I like tactful teasing. Not many people can do it, but it can turn out to be fun. As long as I get to throw my own quips back at the guy, of course. Some friendly flirting.

 

Tactful, theres a key word. All the stuff I've been hearing has been anything but tactful. I think we're on the same wavelength here, friendly flirting but polite. And don't worry, I like a girl to give me her best shots, see if she can keep up with me.

[MetallicAguy]

I've never wanted girlfriends, never wanted dates. I've only ever wanted love. I'm the guy that ends up with one girl

Guys reading this this is what happens when your a nice guy and you "wait" for the perfect girl, you don't know what you find attractive until you start dating some girls. I've added a lot of things to my personal "mental list" in terms of what I find attractive and don't find attractive about women from dating women.

 

Ok and that crap about not taking your way and things don't work out in the long run, LOL. Guys this is bs. My friend was in line for pictures with one of his friends (girl) that he's known like all of his life (never dated) and he was teasing her just for kicks and she totally got a kick out of it and was teasing him back too, they were both having a good time. I don't remember what they were talking about but it was funny, it pretty much started when she was trying to get him to give her money but he didn't let her supplicate him, it was like "friendly teasing". All I remember about the rest of the topics was they weren't like teasing to get somewhere.

 

Though no amount of makeup or the right dress will make you as beautiful as you are after waking up beside you, your hair a mess, just you in your natually beautiful state.

Maybe you live by that term, but mostly every guy I know likes a woman that wears good clothes (not cheap crap but not extremely expensive) , and women believe me a little make up (not too much) will make you look more attractive than without make-up. Best clothing that a girl can wear is probably all the preppy stuff (i.e. A&F, AE, Hollister, etc.). And I'll be honest, messed up hair looks not all that great. I mean it's probably the eqivelent of what you think of a guy that doesn't take a shower every day, his hair is probably greasy and stuff and smells of B.O.

[asdf]

To be honest, I think you know that teasing is not meant as insulting, because hey, you just did it here:

 

I'm not laughing at your jokes, I'm just straight out laughing /at/ you

 

Well, if we're going by the playground method of showing attraction, guess that means you like me. Unfortunately, it just won't work out.

[asdf]

I'm just voicing my opinion on behalf of all the nice guys with a pure heart. You get plenty of posts on how nice guys finish last, how you have to tease, play games, be a bad boy. I'm just trying to encourage all the guys that they don't have to do that and will still come out ahead.

 

Mmmm, evident by the number of "bad boys" whining and making threads saying "bad boys NEVER get the girl in the end

[JRM]

Hm.. It seems the now main debators in this thread(MetallicaGuy&ShySoul) have two different aims in mind. MetallicaGuy is talking mainly about dating, as apposed to long term relationships, of which is what ShySoul is speaking.

 

I still say c0cky/funny is the way to go, but I've been talking about dating too. As far as real committed relationships go, women look for someone who can provide for and support them rather than just a fun challenging guy to hang out with.

[ShySoul]

To be honest, I think you know that teasing is not meant as insulting, because hey, you just did it here:

 

That wasn't teasing, it was flirting. I seem to be quite the flirt lately. All I said to her was that her actions, according to her views, would constitute liking me and that I was taken. There is a difference in flirting (which is fine, fun, and works) and teasing (which by its very definition is of annoyance and irritating, I just looked it up). Everyone example of teasing that has been give has, at its base, been about finding something in the other person to make fun of. I don't do that.

 

Mmmm, evident by the number of "bad boys" whining and making threads saying "bad boys NEVER get the girl in the end

 

Bad boys wouldn't make posts about that because all they are really concerned about is whats in their and the girls pants. Again, ya they get dates. But then they end up having to get more and more dates just to feel valuable. Eventually they come to change their tune cause they know there missing something in their life that will never be fulfiiled by being a bad boy.

 

Nice guys make posts out of frustration, because they see the bad boys breaking hearts and manipulating women. They wonder why they have to wait when they know there way is right. But in the end, they come out ahead. Bad boys continually make posts to defend there position and try to convert others because they need to constantly tell themselves they are right. But then they see they aren't. Bad boys have there fun and lead for the first 8 innings of the ballgame. Then the nice guys hit the homerun in the bottom of the ninth and win the pennent.

 

Cool, a baseball analogy that isn't sexual. Love those sport metaphors.

 

Guys reading this this is what happens when your a nice guy and you "wait" for the perfect girl, you don't know what you find attractive until you start dating some girls. I've added a lot of things to my personal "mental list" in terms of what I find attractive and don't find attractive about women from dating women.

 

I've had my mental list sense I was 5, and it hasn't changed a bit. You know whats on the list, pretty much what is on everyone's list? Someone who understands you, someone who is there for you, someone you can relate with. She'll have similar interests, a great heart, be a spirtual and emotion person with a wonderful sense of values, ethics, and morality. She will care about others, do the right thing, want to make the world a better place. Someone who will encourage me to be my best. Someone smart, loving, kind, generous, decent, trusting, etc. This is what I have always found attractive. What have I never found attractive? Loud, rude people who put themselves first. Those who treat things as a game and manipulate others. Smokers, drinkers, partiers. I never had to date a single girl, because I knew who I was and I knew what I liked and what I didn't like in people in general.

 

Maybe you live by that term, but mostly every guy I know likes a woman that wears good clothes (not cheap crap but not extremely expensive) , and women believe me a little make up (not too much) will make you look more attractive than without make-up. Best clothing that a girl can wear is probably all the preppy stuff (i.e. A&F, AE, Hollister, etc.). And I'll be honest, messed up hair looks not all that great. I mean it's probably the eqivelent of what you think of a guy that doesn't take a shower every day, his hair is probably greasy and stuff and smells of B.O.

 

Clearly you have never spent the night in a womens arms, simple sleeping. Clearly you have never experienced the sensation of waking up to see her peacefully sleeping beside you, no stress or worries, just a blissful calm. It's a feeling you can't accurately put into words, but when it happens you'll go back on everything you just said there in that paragraph metallicaguy. And don't be quick to judge the guy there. I wash everyday, but my hair gets oily quick. And yet, when we awoke, she found my hair to be cute, all messed up and even oily. Yes, brush your teeth, but after that, just be natural, its the most beautiful way you can go.

[jordan_2]

I posted this somewhere else (possibly in this thread)

but I'll say it again...

there is a third type of guy to add to this list of "the nice guy" and the "jerk"...

i read this on a website that a poster had posted and I think it is 100% true..

nice guys are sucks, flat out (sorry for hitting the nail on the head so hard) but it's true...

they're insecure about themselves so they vent these insecurities on the woman that they can't attract...(they like to think its the woman and not them with the issue) thus playing the "victim" of love gone bad...

 

the jerk, is not any more secure than the nice guy, the only difference is, his way of covering his insecurities up (as shysoul said) is by dating even more hoping to shield the void in themselves with loads and loads of beautiful ladies...by doing this, they hope to personify a character of a "pimp-like" stature, where they become respected because they can get a number of girls on their sides everyday...

(then u can put the nice guy fretting over the evenly insecure jerk and make a cycle)

 

however thers is a third guy...the KIND guy...the one who is not nice to woman just to get their attention in hopes of sparking a "oh he's so nice, I wanna go out with him" mood...instead kind guys are generous and genuine about their actions...they are kind whether or not the girl is watching them....I think that this more respectable type of guy ends up with a fulfilled life because he is able to show a genuine respect for himself and the world, which will reflect onto the women around him, drawing a "true attraction"....lol sorry if this seems like mummble jumble, but if you read the article (hopefully I'll find it, or if someone can find the link) you'll understand where I'm coming from...but here's an easy way to remember

 

nice guy- sulky, insecure whiner...

jerk guy- equally insecure, possible womanizer, always a void in a relationship

kind guy- genuine person who knows how not only to treat his lady properly, but shows respect for himself and teh world (this means good!)

[ShySoul]

Actually, what you say is the kind guy I would put as a real nice guy. What you call I nice guy I would classify as simple, overly insecure. No need to bring down the name of people who are honestly nice for the sake of being nice.

 

Nice guy = someone who is nice

Kind guy= someone who is kind

Jerk = someone who displays jerk like characteristics, being mean, manpulative etc.

Insecure guy = someone who is insecure

 

Labels are pretty clear to me.

[jordan_2]

lol sorry shysoul

but I didn't wanna complicate things and make people think that the "nice guy" was all of a sudden the guy to be..

if I can somehow find the article, it'll explain the differnce in greater detail but I'm just going upon what I read, and it made perfect sense,

but from what you're saying, yeah it would make sense to classify it as such (by the way lol i like calling the nice guys "overly insecure" it has a nice ring to it

 

 

*edit*: i found the link, it was posted by chiclid_chick in another post:

Not all nice guys finish last. My BF is one of them that didn't.

 

Anyway, I would definitely read this

link removed

 

You'll have to add an "i" where the "*" is because it edits it. >.

[skyteph]

There is a difference in flirting (which is fine, fun, and works) and teasing (which by its very definition is of annoyance and irritating, I just looked it up).

 

But this isn't just teasing, it's using teasing with a positive spin TO flirt.

[jordan_2]

 

ShySoul wrote:

There is a difference in flirting (which is fine, fun, and works) and teasing (which by its very definition is of annoyance and irritating, I just looked it up).

 

 

But this isn't just teasing, it's using teasing with a positive spin TO flirt.

 

then is in not just called flirting???

teasing is when you poke fun at someone, but i think in the use here, teasing has taken on a new connotation...

it means more of a playful, way of interacting with the opposite sex to help ease the tension...by being playful, you can pay a compliment to someone by "teasing" them about it...lol i know it's hard to explain, but for eg. "hey nice hair, maybe one day I can grow locks like your's and be the hottest blonde in school" something as stupid and random as that, is not looked upon as the dictionary term of teasing, however, this new coined term is simply a comfortable method to give off subtle compliments without pouring out all your feelings for the opposite sex...it's like an ice breaker to show interest without being too aggressive or too shy, or too open...sorry if this didn;t make any sense, I just realized how this term's connotation is changed when applying to flirting

[skyteph]

 

ShySoul wrote:

There is a difference in flirting (which is fine, fun, and works) and teasing (which by its very definition is of annoyance and irritating, I just looked it up).

 

 

But this isn't just teasing, it's using teasing with a positive spin TO flirt.

 

then is in not just called flirting???

 

Yes, it is, and teasing is the style of flirting.

[jordan_2]

got it

lol sooo confused right now,

but I somehow get it

[ShySoul]

But this isn't just teasing, it's using teasing with a positive spin TO flirt.

 

Teasing would have been:

 

"Boy steph, you keep trying to get into arguments with me. Your all over me. And you don't even know me. Kinda easy aren't you, going after a guy you barely know like that. And going after a guy that much older. What would that make you? But don't worry, I kinda like the attention, even though you probably do it with everyother guy."

 

Hm.. It seems the now main debators in this thread(MetallicaGuy&ShySoul) have two different aims in mind. MetallicaGuy is talking mainly about dating, as apposed to long term relationships, of which is what ShySoul is speaking.

 

I still say c0cky/funny is the way to go, but I've been talking about dating too. As far as real committed relationships go, women look for someone who can provide for and support them rather than just a fun challenging guy to hang out with.

 

And the point being, you can get all kinds of dates but if they don't lead anywhere, what did you really gain? Can you really count it as success? Would you be more proud of saying "I've had dates with 20 different women" or "I had a date with one women and we've been together for a year?" What I say gets dates, and those dates actually go somewhere.

[MetallicAguy]

women look for someone who can provide for and support them rather than just a fun challenging guy to hang out with.

If your trying to settle down and start a family listen to shysoul, otherwise...well you get the point. You can still have a long-term by using a more effective fun way of flirting....this guy just believes it doesn't work because he sucks at it and got a negative response. That's like trying to ride a bike for the first time and you fell over and got a bloody knee and gave up and decided it wasn't good to ride bikes, if you keep trying and maintain your balance and start out small you'll start getting positive responses.

 

Boy steph, you keep trying to get into arguments with me. Your all over me. And you don't even know me. Kinda easy aren't you, going after a guy you barely know like that. And going after a guy that much older. What would that make you? But don't worry, I kinda like the attention, even though you probably do it with everyother guy

LOL. That's not teasing, that's what you think teasing is and you throw an insult in there.

 

Nice guy = someone who is nice

Kind guy= someone who is kind

Jerk = someone who displays jerk like characteristics, being mean, manpulative etc.

Insecure guy = someone who is insecure

 

So someone who can flirt in a different way than you is a jerk .

[ShySoul]

MetallicAguy,

 

If it works so well, answer these questions:

 

1. When was the last time a girl said she loved you?

2. When was the last time you kissed a girl?

3. When was the last time you spent the night lying next to a girl?

4. When was the last time you had a girl saying she needs to be next to you?

5. When was the last time a girl described you as the perfect guy?

 

Please enlighten us. Cause if teasing works so well for you, then you'll have had some of these things at least and you'll have had it recently. I've had all this things lately, so clearly what I say works just fine. Can you tell me you've had this kind of success?

 

As for my negative response, it's not just me. It's from several guys I know who got the same response. So I can point to a proven track record of success for what I say, and a proven track record of failure for what you say.

 

Anyone who actually wants something real, you know what to do. Anyone who wants to listen to a guy who claims to have success but can't back it up, listen to MetallicAguy.

[MetallicAguy]

It's from several guys I know who got the same response. So I can point to a proven track record of success for what I say, and a proven track record of failure for what you say.

They suck at it..not my problem.

 

 

 

When was the last time you kissed a girl?

Last year around June/July.

 

When was the last time a girl said she loved you?

Sometime last year, recently though I've had girls say there interested in me...not really interested in them, there completely different than me I don't have any interest in them. One girl is interested in me, I can tell by her body language, "Proxemics", and how she talks to me, acts different around me only, and she has a bf. Except I'm not interested in her.

 

 

When was the last time you spent the night lying next to a girl?

I was watching a movie with her on the couch, it wasn't a night but still, it's close enough.

 

 

Cause if teasing works so well for you, then you'll have had some of these things at least and you'll have had it recently.

Well, what if I'm not interested in anyone right now? It sure works (although I don't use it that much...just comes off as superficial) when I'm hanging out with girls that I don't want to go farther than friends just to give the conversation flavor, but that's just recently though, it's worked with girls I've liked in the past.

 

 

 

5. When was the last time a girl described you as the perfect guy?

Haven't met a girl that's told me that...(your probably so pissed at me your going to flame me because I've never had it happen XD). Plus I don't want to be the "perfect" guy because if your perfect it gets boring. Like lets say, you meet a girl and she has nothing you dislike about her. Like your both the same, that is boring, if a girl doesn't have one thing that I don't like about her, like lets say my favorite food place is subway and she hates subway, I won't like it but I'll get over it. It kind of feels like a "challenge" sort of in an emotional way. Playful teasing, kind of makes you a challenge sort of in an emotional way when your dealing with a girl your interested in. And by the way, several guys probably failed at using teasing because they just met the girl a while ago (or said it wrong, talked about her weight, clothes, or something like that) and it gave her the wrong idea. That is their fault.

 

 

1. When was the last time a girl said she loved you?

2. When was the last time you kissed a girl?

3. When was the last time you spent the night lying next to a girl?

4. When was the last time you had a girl saying she needs to be next to you?

5. When was the last time a girl described you as the perfect guy?

You've had all this happen to you with your first gf, you think you're hot **** now? Lol.

 

Anyone who wants to listen to a guy who claims to have success but can't back it up, listen to MetallicAguy.

Lol.