help me....

[SugarSweetness407]

I dont know what to do....i think i might have ruined the best relationship i have ever had. i have no one to talk to right now, and i need some adive. my boyfriend and i had an argument about me not telling the truth. he once asked me if i had relationships with men of another race, and at the time i told him no. well tonight i told him the truth. he was mad at me because i "lied" to him. i told him i was so sorry for lying and at the time he asked me i didnt feel comfortable telling him. now he says he needs time to think about things and i dont know what that means. i didnt want to hurt him, but i am so scared to trust people after my last relationship. when he dropped me off i said something that was extremely hurtful to him and i regret so bad now, i just wasnt thinking and i was hurting so bad myself that i said..."im not your ex girlfriend that sucks every guys ****". well needless to say that didnt help my situation. now he is overly hurt and i dont want it to ruin things with him even though i am sorry for saying that, he doesnt believe me now because i lied before. i dont know what to do...and i care about him so much, i honestly didnt mean to hurt him i just wasnt comfortable in telling him my sexual experiences at the time and when i said that hurtful thing about his ex girlfriend i didnt mean that either. i dont know what is going to happen to us now...but i just need some adivce...thanks

[melrich]

It doesn't sound like much of an issue to me. Can't you call him and apologise for saying what you said and explain your lie about past partners?

[SugarSweetness407]

i did in the car on the way home, he still is scared i think that i am like his ex. i dont know what to do. i hurts me so bad for what i said...i cant erase it...i can only apologize. i dont know what will happen next.....

[goddess23]

to be honest it seems like your bf was kind of waiting for an oppertunity to take a break. i dont want to be too disheartening here but maybe its best to leave it alone for a bit you've told him you're sorry you could even send him a really heartfelt letter or email or something or even meet up and say you just wanna tlak eveyrthing over. but it seems that right now he wants the space and pulling him is actually going to cause you to push him away. i know you're scared right now but realize that even if it ends its not the end of the world. but its not over and this could jsut be a little bump in your relationship road just give it a few days let thigns cool off and then see whats happening. then you can know for sure where you guys stand.

[pizzachick13]

can i ask what was so important about having relationships with men of another race? is he racist?

 

i agree with goddess23 though. just give it time and he'll realise that if you were like his ex-gf then he would have already gotten rid of you (i'm assuming he broke up with her, but vice versa if she broke it off with him).

 

Sappho...

[SugarSweetness407]

i dont think it was the fact that he was mad that i had sex with other races it was the fact that i didn't tell him when he first originally asked. not because i didnt want to i did, but i was scared and at the moment, i didn't feel comfortable. you are all probably right. but i know i said some hurtful things. thank you for the advice.

[Kurodashi]

It certainly is a pity you didn't tell him the truth.

I honestly believe that no matter what you should always be immediately open and honest in a relationship from the word go, otherwise problems will come up later on, when it will hurt more.

Apologize to him and tell him that you didnt mean any ill harm by your lie.

And... God i wish alot of enotalone members did this, but tell him what you told us! Show him how sincerly sorry you are for what happened.

Im sure you can work thrugh this if you want to be honest and open from now on.

Good luck.

[djedix]

Your past is your past.

And what's in the past, is in the past.

 

If it involves anything to do with STDs it should be known, if not, then telling the b/f how many/what kinda guys you've been with will make most of them insecure and pissed.

 

I personally don't care who the new girls been with, aslong as there's no diseases or surprises.