Making contact after first date

[pip]

If a guy is still really interested in a girl after their first date, how long will he wait to message or call her again?

 

If he doesn't message or call me, should I assume he's not interested?

 

Thanks

[sidehop]

There's always that general rule of thumb (stupid IMO) of guys waiting 2~3 days after. If he doesn't call back after a week I guess he's not interested. Personally I like to give the girl a day or so depending on the person.

[pip]

Yeah, and I know I could always message him, but he knows how I feel, so the ball's in his court.

[hoppy27]

was this the first date???

 

im in a similar situation. except we have had acouple dates. ive called her acouple times. she will return a call............but wont make a call.

im kinda taking the hint.

[darkblue]

If a guy is still really interested in a girl after their first date, how long will he wait to message or call her again?

 

If he doesn't message or call me, should I assume he's not interested?

 

Thanks

 

I don't think you should assume anything. He could just be waiting to make it look as if he isn't being 'needy'; or playing 'hard to get'.

 

I think, 3 days is acceptable anything more is pushing it, and after a week I wouldn't bother.

[DN]

Yeah, and I know I could always message him, but he knows how I feel, so the ball's in his court.

 

Who asked who out in the first place? Why can't you message him? Just because he knows how you feel doesn't mean the ball's in his court. This isn't a tennis game. If you want to have a second date then you can ask him out - this is 2005 not 1955.

[pip]

Just a second DN. I say 'the ball's in his court' precisely because I've told him how I feel and it's up to him to work out what he wants. I realise that I can easily contact him myself, but I'd prefer to give him a few days to work it out and approach me himself.

 

I wasn't making that assumption because he's male and I'm female, or because we're playing any kind of back and forth 'game', or anything like that. Sheesh.

 

Anyway, thanks for the advice guys. I hope he does call/message soon! [-o

[DN]

I am not clear what you mean by 'told him how you feel'. What did you say to him?

 

I am not trying to attack you here - just pointing out that sometimes people don't act or react precisely as we would wish and we can lose out on a potentially good relationship because we wait for them to take the next step. There is nothing wrong with being proactive as well as reactive.

[chai714]

I would say that if 2 weeks passes and no call, his interest level is not high. Also, I don't believe in the phrase "the ball is on his/her court." This phrase means you're relying on someone else to take control of the situation, when you knowingly have control too. It's this simple - you can call him too. Next time you see him, watch his body language and that will tell you whether or not he is into you. If you don't know much about body language, learn about it. A good book is one called "Body language Secrets" by R Don Steele.

[Msnak]

So, I met this guy online. We met and had a great date in June. Only thing, in summer, we both had travel plans and lots of crazy work hours. It's August now and I haven't had a second date, though he's asked me out a few times but something always comes up or I'm unavailable. We're both interested, we stay in touch OK, but the fates are working against us. I've called, I've asked him out. He's asked me out. He seems excited about us, and then he seems overly shy. I think I should move on. But he's the best guy I've ever met. I'm so confused. I'm miserable because I want to spend time with him and don't want to move on without seeing him at least once more. What to do?

[Jaela]

Make time to see him once more!

[MetallicAguy]

It really depends on the guy and when he wants to call, just forget about him after a week he should of called by then.