Loneliness & Depression,United With Feelings of Betrayal

[annie24]

You need NC, so just pick up the phone then and cancel the beach event. She can go to the beach with another friend, and so can you.

Argh. Alright, well, i still don't agree with that.

 

Okay, I'll walk her home - that's it, if I get myself some coffee to-go oh well, it's dark anyways - she needs to be safe.

 

That's my excuse and I'm sticking with it. Though, I'll make sure NC is the focal point of our conversation.

 

You are 18. she was not that instrumental in your life, if you were older, and maybe had a 5 year or longer relationship, it would be more difficult.

 

It was my longest relationship so I haven't even learnt how to deal with something 8½ months long yet.

 

 

1- Ex-boyfriend sat around all summer feeling sorry for himself

2- Ex-boyfriend split to Europe for 2 months, and went all over Greece and had some wild adventures, saw the acropolis, ended up in Italy.. drank grappa....backpacked through Tuscany, met some hot Italian babes....

 

It's your life- it's your choice.

 

Well, I'm actually already planning a trip to Europe for 8-12 months. So that just might work out.

 

I was talking to her about doing a "long-distance" relationship for while I was there. What does that sound like to you?

 

If you're going to wallow, you may as well wallow on some beach in Greece.

 

Hahaha, oh I like that! 8)

 

"Long-distance" while you are in europe? Honestly, I think this is the most ridiculous idea I've ever heard. Dude - she broke up with you! What are you doing? It's over!

 

I strongly agree with Richgabe. I know that this is your first love, and that first love is very powerful and it's hard to know how to get over a relationship the first time you break up, but you need to stop this now! She broke up with you. You should take some time to heal, stop being so clingy.

 

When someone breaks up with you is not the time to be planning a long distance relationship with them. It's over!

 

Where to meet new girls? Anywhere! If you go anywhere, you'll see that 50% of the population is female. Meet a new girl - at work, in school, a neighbor, whatever. But not right now, you need to heal first.

 

And yes, trust me, you're not the only one on the planet that can take her to the beach.

[perseverance_rules]

Let me say this: I realize that this post hasnt been posted to since the 2nd of June but I want to reply anyhow.

 

Im 29 years old, have been there done that. I have been married once before at age 23 and it lasted 12 months. I married this woman because I truly thought she was the perfect one, my "soul mate". After time went on we didnt get along like friends and lovers should. A married couple for that matter. I would call her just to call her, try and meet her for things, and tried to be friends with her just because I didnt want to lose that contact, basically holding on to her...which was never good for me.

 

She ended up cheating on me with a FEW men not just one, and ended up pregnant, which she said it was mine. IN the end she lost it five months nito her pregnancy, which I later found out that she had an abortion.

 

Those feelings lasted nearly a year, and I really to this day dont know how I got over that, but I did. When I think of her now, its just a phase of my life that I learned from. Yes you feel like it should have been the one, and you LOVE her, but calling her and keeping in touch with her and telling her how you feel only makes you look pathetic to her, and fuels her fire of wanting you out of the picture making her feel better about getting rid of you. The saying on that one is, "let her go, and if she comes back it was meant to be, if she doesnt, then youre better off."

 

After all that I went through, 2 years ago this month I met a new woman, after having dated many girls over the prior few years, only to keep finding clingy and very needy women. This new woman knew of my past, and knew what I went through in relationships, and I knew what she went through. Together, we understood each others pains and sorrows in life and wanted to be together to share better experiences. We had so much in common and basically she moved in within a month and a half of us dating because she was being asked to move from her current place and had no better place to go.

 

Things were good, and things were bad at times, but we talked things out whenever we needed to to make it better, and we worked at it as much as we could.

 

This past wednesday we found out that she was pregnant. I was so filled with joy because anything that was causing problems would seem so little compared to what we were facing... A NEW LIFE IN THE WORLD.

 

two days later I found out from HER best friend that she cheated on me last weekend with a guy from the bar she had been going to with her girlfriends.

 

I told her she had to go when I got home after that talk with my friends. (her best friend told my friends, and they dragged me out of the house to tell me). I could not believe my ears. I was SO happy one day, and totally floored the next.

 

Not only did this happen to me once in my life, it has now happened twice now. SO I get to live 9 months wondering if this is my child, and I truly hope it is. Im 29, and I think IM ready for that, Ive always wanted that, and so has she. What I feel right now as I write this is that Im not sure how long this will take to get over, but what I do know is that the more Time I spend without her around and seeing her, the better I will be and the faster the healing process will be. The hardest thing to deal with is that I just started an insurance sales career at the place she is the secretary at. Yes that will be hard to do, and Im not sure how long it will last, but at least I will try to make it work. Only time will tell that Im sure.

 

I too was broken up with from my high school love, only for her to marry my best friend. Thats a totally different ball of wax that I hold in my heart to this day, but I am still best friends with him, he is one of the guys that told me about this fresh incident with the mother of my so called baby.

 

She told me that she was only with him last weekend friday and then sunday nights, and that she was pregnant well before that and shes sure its mine. But after this, who am I to believe? I cant believe her, only tests performed after the birth. So I have to get over this and not worry about the baby until that time comes.

 

The biggest moral here to anyone who has gone through tough times is this: No matter what you are going through, there is always someone going through the exact same thing you are, or worse. My motto is "well, it could be worse" as long as I tell myself that this is probably for the best, and it could be worse, Im better off.

 

Weve all been there guy, but TRUST me. IT DOES GET BETTER. And looking back you will see how silly you are being! Find another woman, hell find ten, but dont hold onto what doesnt want to be held on to. Time heals the wounds....thats all that can heal it.

 

THANKS FOR YOU TIME EVERYONE! IT FEELS BETTER TO WRITE THIS MYSELF EVEN! Im just starting to heal, and this feels good to me right now.

 

8)

[Ripples]

Perseverance,

 

You sound like one strong guy. I have no words of wisdom for you but i do admire your courage.

 

Good luck man.