He lied

[catfeeder]

Whether he's lying or not becomes irrelevant when the bottom line is, you don't trust him.

 

When younger I viewed people questioning whether I trust my BF as pointing out that I had too little faith in the guy rather than pointing to my own gut instincts as a reason why I shouldn't overlook the obvious. They meant that this one particular incident isn't the problem--the fact that I'm questioning the guy's trustworthiness in the first place can mean one of two things: either the guy has already behaved in ways that have caused me to no longer trust him, OR I went into this without a healthy ability to set my internal trust meter to a neutral 5 and allow someone to earn my trust over time.

 

Either way, the relationship would keep me miserable--and is that how I want to live? If someone behaves in ways that knock down my trust, why would I stick around for that? On the other hand, if I'm entering relationships with a mistrustful chip that I haven't healed from my own past, then I'M the one who isn't ready for a relationship, so we wouldn't have a shot no matter what he does.

 

Head high, and get clarity about whether it's just this guy who you don't trust, or all men. If it's all men, consider working with a therapist to regain your ability to trust within reason. Otherwise, you'll project suspicions of future harm onto anyone who wants to partner with you, and that's not relationship material.