How do I ever move on with life after drunk kissing my friend's husband?

[Lemon2018]

I do want to get help for the drinking. I know that it needs to be sorted, I completely agree. But even if I never touch another drop of alcohol, it won't undo the damage that's already been done. My friend will never speak to me again, her friends will never speak to me again, her family will never speak to me again. They are all likely shocked and disgusted - as am I.

 

I'm anxious but I'm not socially anxious. I am socially awkward though. I'm just really bad at making friends.

 

I have a job at the moment and I'm in my notice period and have taken another day off because I can't stop crying. I can tell my manager is annoyed and probably thinks that I just don't care anymore because I'm leaving soon. My references for my new job has already been handed in but maybe he'll now get in touch with them and tell them about all this extra leave.

 

My boyfriend is probably going to leave me as he said he can only stay with me if I pull it together, and I can't. I can't accept that my life is ed up and I've lost the majority of people who I cared about and socialised with.

 

I know the problem is deeper than that one incident that night. But that incident is what has caused this and as I said, even if I never drink again, the damage is done.