mustlovedogs Posted October 21, 2018 Share Posted October 21, 2018 Ugh, I can sense the judgement for this coming lol. My car (not his, because his is a two seat convertible and not exactly... useable). Do you think that’s something a mature man does? Car sex is a high school thing. Not to mention - there’s the risk of getting caught. You could get on a sex offender list for that. Link to comment
makenzie23 Posted October 22, 2018 Author Share Posted October 22, 2018 My twin brother at 61 or so...(a few years ago) married a woman his daughters age. He was just going thru a divorce and met her online. She was Filipino and newly over to this country. Had a 9 mo. old and a 3 yr. old. Her husband (in his 40's) had just died of a heart attack. She wanted someone to take care of her and her kids. My brother wanted someone young enough to enjoy sex....and (i feel) he could be in charge. My brother was NEVER a kid person...so why in his 60's he wanted to take on young kids, I'll never know. But it's been 4 years and they're still together. (his previous marriage lasted 1 1/2 years!!! ugh) Not being together because one could die...would never be a deterrent for me. I just think there are far more men....even in their 30's that would be a better match. But I'm not here to judge...I just don't like old men NOW...at my old age! lol Will he be active in 5 more years? That's MY dilemma!!! Sure he could pass away in 10 more years, but so could anyone. And maybe you do have an emotional connection. I say , enjoy it while you can. It probably won't last...but you're not asking it too! You're young....most young relationships don't last no matter what the age gap is....or isn't. Thank you for the story about your brother, that's very sweet (: And I completely agree with you. Link to comment
Hollyj Posted October 22, 2018 Share Posted October 22, 2018 Why don't you go to his home? Why are you fooling around in a car? It sounds like this dude is married or involved. How long are you going to be one another's secret? I don't understand this at all! Link to comment
yatsue Posted October 22, 2018 Share Posted October 22, 2018 Given you're together for the rest of his life, do you accept becoming a widow at middle age? Link to comment
makenzie23 Posted October 22, 2018 Author Share Posted October 22, 2018 Do you think that’s something a mature man does? Car sex is a high school thing. Not to mention - there’s the risk of getting caught. You could get on a sex offender list for that. It was not his idea to get frisky in a car, it was mine. He always wanted me to come to his home and I declined. So he offered a hotel, which I declined. I am aware of the sex offender thing, so I'm definitely cautious. Link to comment
mustlovedogs Posted October 22, 2018 Share Posted October 22, 2018 It was not his idea to get frisky in a car, it was mine. He always wanted me to come to his home and I declined. So he offered a hotel, which I declined. I am aware of the sex offender thing, so I'm definitely cautious. Again, a mature man wouldn’t do that. Link to comment
Hollyj Posted October 22, 2018 Share Posted October 22, 2018 How long have you been dating? Link to comment
makenzie23 Posted October 22, 2018 Author Share Posted October 22, 2018 Why don't you go to his home? Why are you fooling around in a car? It sounds like this dude is married or involved. How long are you going to be one another's secret? I don't understand this at all! I plan on going soon, it's just far away. Also it was my idea not to go to his house, I'll mention that again. I'm not his secret, he's told his friends about me. Hopefully he won't be my secret for too much longer. Link to comment
makenzie23 Posted October 22, 2018 Author Share Posted October 22, 2018 Again, a mature man wouldn’t do that. Wouldn't do which part? Link to comment
makenzie23 Posted October 22, 2018 Author Share Posted October 22, 2018 How long have you been dating? It's been about 9 months. Link to comment
Hollyj Posted October 22, 2018 Share Posted October 22, 2018 I plan on going soon, it's just far away. Also it was my idea not to go to his house, I'll mention that again. I'm not his secret, he's told his friends about me. Hopefully he won't be my secret for too much longer. How do you know this? Have you spoken to them? Link to comment
mustlovedogs Posted October 22, 2018 Share Posted October 22, 2018 Wouldn't do which part? Even entertain the idea of car sex (or whatever y’all do). Have you met his friends? Link to comment
Hollyj Posted October 22, 2018 Share Posted October 22, 2018 It's been about 9 months. You have not met anyone close to him in a nine month period (secret).. Link to comment
makenzie23 Posted October 22, 2018 Author Share Posted October 22, 2018 Given you're together for the rest of his life, do you accept becoming a widow at middle age? Depending on how the next few years go, my answer would be yes. It just doesn't make sense to me to turn down however many years I might get to spend with him, just because there's a good chance he'll die first. Link to comment
makenzie23 Posted October 22, 2018 Author Share Posted October 22, 2018 How do you know this? Have you spoken to them? No, I've never met them. He told me early on in our relationship that he told his closest friends about me, and they weren't too fond of the idea. Link to comment
mustlovedogs Posted October 22, 2018 Share Posted October 22, 2018 No, I've never met them. He told me early on in our relationship that he told his closest friends about me, and they weren't too fond of the idea. Ah. So everything you know about the relationship he told you. Must all be true then. Link to comment
Hollyj Posted October 22, 2018 Share Posted October 22, 2018 No, I've never met them. He told me early on in our relationship that he told his closest friends about me, and they weren't too fond of the idea. You don't know this. He can anything. I think the fact that you have not met a soul, indicates it is a lie. I think that it is very strange that you have had a secret relationship for 9 months. Link to comment
makenzie23 Posted October 22, 2018 Author Share Posted October 22, 2018 Even entertain the idea of car sex (or whatever y’all do). Have you met his friends? Maybe he's a little sexually immature for his age then. Which I don't mind, he's a lot of fun. Haven't met them, but apparently they know of me. Link to comment
makenzie23 Posted October 22, 2018 Author Share Posted October 22, 2018 Ah. So everything you know about the relationship he told you. Must all be true then. What do you mean? I trust him. Link to comment
makenzie23 Posted October 22, 2018 Author Share Posted October 22, 2018 You don't know this. He can anything. I think the fact that you have not met a soul, indicates it is a lie. I think that it is very strange that you have had a secret relationship for 9 months. I have not wanted to meet his friends. It's strange, I know. Link to comment
Hollyj Posted October 22, 2018 Share Posted October 22, 2018 OP, I suggest that you tell him that you would like to meet his friend circle next week. Then, ask to meet his family the following. You will see exactly what this is about by how he responds, and acts. If he does not follow through with this, then clearly his friends do not know, and never will. I would bet money, that you will never meet anyone in his life, and you will continue to be a secret. Link to comment
Realitynut Posted October 22, 2018 Share Posted October 22, 2018 To be honest...my brother starting to date a 33 year old at the age of 61 was bad enough. I told him...she's using you for a meal ticket. (he makes good money). He said so? I think basically he feels they're using each other. They both get what they want. I secretly think....she's probably thinking, if I wait long enough, he'll kick the bucket and I can marry someone younger. (he is a pain in the butt!) BUT....that being said....18 years old and 60....eeew. He shouldn't even find you REMOTELY attractive in a 'personal' level. My ex told me, he could NEVER date a woman his daughter's age. It would feel WRONG, WRONG, WRONG.... BUT...you're both consenting adults. Let the fling begin....just don't be hurt when it ends. Link to comment
mustlovedogs Posted October 22, 2018 Share Posted October 22, 2018 What do you mean? I trust him. What I mean is you have no experience to base any statement off of. What’s his place like? What are his friends like? You have no answers to these questions but what he tells you. Trust but verify. You’re being naive if you do anything but that. Link to comment
makenzie23 Posted October 22, 2018 Author Share Posted October 22, 2018 OP, I suggest that you tell him that you would like to meet his friend circle next week. Then, ask to meet his family the following. You will see exactly what this is about by how he responds, and acts. If he does not follow through with this, then clearly his friends do not know, and never will. I would bet money, that you will never meet anyone in his life, and you will continue to be a secret. Interesting idea. I'll consider it. Link to comment
makenzie23 Posted October 22, 2018 Author Share Posted October 22, 2018 What I mean is you have no experience to base any statement off of. What’s his place like? What are his friends like? You have no answers to these questions but what he tells you. Trust but verify. You’re being naive if you do anything but that. I've seen many photos of his home, and I've read articles about his friends (local politics). I don't know them yet but I don't have a problem with that. Link to comment
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