A blast from the past and I’m in a year long relationship.. [emoji30]

[jessicia]

I don't really get what is keeping you in this relationship anymore, OP.

 

I would be done.

 

What does op mean?

 

I’ve set and wondered here lately the same and honestly I guess bc I love him and I do see the good in him as a person and my boyfriend we view life the same in many ways and are focused and want the same things down the road in life.. I see how much good he’s done for himself with my help being a year sober and doing better in life, growing closer with his family. I am very proud of him... but I just need some guidance and advice over this whole situation at times idk how to make sense of things or I think am I overthinking or what needs to be fixed and how?

and he wants to fix this relationship I’ve been very opened about how I feel and he’s listened to everything I’ve had to say and I’ve listened to everything he’s had to say about the whole situation.. he doesn’t think that our relationship is as bad as I do. [emoji17]

[Duzie16]

What does op mean?

 

I’ve set and wondered here lately the same and honestly I guess bc I love him and I do see the good in him as a person and my boyfriend we view life the same in many ways and are focused and want the same things down the road in life.. I see how much good he’s done for himself with my help being a year sober and doing better in life, growing closer with his family. I am very proud of him... but I just need some guidance and advice over this whole situation at times idk how to make sense of things or I think am I overthinking or what needs to be fixed and how?

and he wants to fix this relationship I’ve been very opened about how I feel and he’s listened to everything I’ve had to say and I’ve listened to everything he’s had to say about the whole situation.. he doesn’t think that our relationship is as bad as I do. [emoji17]

 

Original poster...thats you (;

[abitbroken]

I feel like I’m not settling but I do believe everyone deserves a second chance and I’ve been fighting for this relationship and got to where enough is enough for me but I’ve been willing to hear him out and work on things together to see what we need to do to make things work and different things with his health has took place so I’ve been there every step of the way because that’s just the person I am.. is that a bad thing? Can you give someone too many chances? Just because of his actions and him trying I do see that he’s knows I’m pulling away from him.

 

second chances are for people that crash your car, chose to take a really demanding job and didn't realize that it would take them away from you and they come back telling you they realized it was a mistake, People that put their foot in their mouth one time and say something dumb. "second chances" don't work for a relationship that is fundamentally incompatible or there is mental illness or drug abuse. He didn't have a "slip up" -- you are trying to pound a square peg into a round hole. He will always have issues with depression and if you stay, you will ultimately be driven crazy by the fact that you can't do anything about it -- that you will always be pushed away, or always be crying about how he doesn't give you what you need.

[abitbroken]

btw, just because someone has good in them does not mean they are the person for you. Tons of people have a lot of good in them -- but they don't make them the right choice to be my husband. There are a lot of guys who are kind, make enough money to put food in their mouths, etc, and that should NOT be the reason to stay in a relationship - that's just baseline adulting. I think you should break it off. It doesn't matter if HE is thinking the relationship is okay or not. Afterall, my abusive ex thought our relationship at times was great -- while i was suffering and being treated badly. This is about is what is best for YOU - not his perception of the relationship.

 

As far as the high school guy - look at him as a gift -- he has opened your eyes more to the fact that your relationship is terrible. But do NOt get together with him. Break up with your boyfriend and tell your high school guy that you are sorry he and his girlfriend are no longer together for the sake of his child and that you will not intefere.

[jessicia]

btw, just because someone has good in them does not mean they are the person for you. Tons of people have a lot of good in them -- but they don't make them the right choice to be my husband. There are a lot of guys who are kind, make enough money to put food in their mouths, etc, and that should NOT be the reason to stay in a relationship - that's just baseline adulting. I think you should break it off. It doesn't matter if HE is thinking the relationship is okay or not. Afterall, my abusive ex thought our relationship at times was great -- while i was suffering and being treated badly. This is about is what is best for YOU - not his perception of the relationship.

 

As far as the high school guy - look at him as a gift -- he has opened your eyes more to the fact that your relationship is terrible. But do NOt get together with him. Break up with your boyfriend and tell your high school guy that you are sorry he and his girlfriend are no longer together for the sake of his child and that you will not intefere.

 

 

 

Thank you! Your words mean a lot and made me think about a lot of things.. you truly made me view my situation with a different mind set.