He wants to stop being friends

[Adexx]

So earlier this year, this guy and I started talking. Of course at first, we weren't really comfortable with each other but soon him and I worked out great. We see each other and we talk all the time in school and then later at night, we probably text. Things were great and at first, it seems like nothing was going to ruin this friendship. There were some troubles that we faced around 2 months ago and that made us take a break from each other, but I wouldn't say that it was a big deal. Once we gotten over it, we started talking to each other again and things were even better than the last time. He would be the first to text me early in the morning and the last person I would text at night, it was as if we were dating. Idk, it would be a lie if I say that I never had any feelings for him however, he does have a bad side that I truly despise.

 

I guess, throughout our "perfect friendship" there were also times where I truly hate him. Even then, he used to teased me and make fun of me and sometimes it hurts but I didn't want to be appear as weak or sensitive so I brushed it off (and I'm not really one to hold grudges on people). Back to what I was saying, we went out once and that made us closer however, it was kind of confusing for the both of us as well, as we don't know where we stand in the 'relationship.' Soon, I realised that the feelings I had for him was just a pure immature crush, and I know that deep down the both of us will never work out...so you could say that I got over him. He then admitted about two weeks ago that he liked me, but since I didn't feel the same way anymore, I suggested that the both of us stayed friends. The very next day, he told me that he didn't like me anymore and had move on to another girl in our class. I was beyond happy. I thought that the both of us could go back to how we were and things couldn't seem more perfect. You could say, I was being pathetic and unrealistic.

 

Since then, I take the teasings more seriously than ever mostly because it felt like the teasings were becoming more hurtful each day. Whenever he makes fun of me, I would get angry and annoyed and I would tell him to just go away but of course, I would just be okay again the next day. However, today was different. I hated him more than ever, I hated him so much I wanted him to feel what I felt. I was so disappointed. We planned to hang out with the girl that he liked tomorrow and I would be third wheeling and help him out, but he told me after our fight that he wasn't coming. Then, I told him that it was fine if he didn't want anything to do with me anymore and he suggested that we should stop being friends. Before we ended everything, I asked him why he was so mean to me all this time and why he hated me so much. He said that, it was because I had a weakness. He told me that I had trouble standing up for myself and that the reason he was teasing me all this time, was so he could fix me. I don't know about you, but knowing the type of person he is that sounds veryyy sketchy.

 

Anyways, I have no idea what to do. He was one of my close friends and probably, the first person that I could tell all my problems to without judging me. Of course, I care about him and if I had a choice, I would want to stay friends with him. However, deep deep down I feel like our friendship was very toxic. Idk what to do, I feel like it's my fault that our friendship have ended but maybe that is what's best for the both of us. Should I try to get him back? Should I just stop here if so, how can I get over him? Was it my fault? Could have this been easily avoided? :(

[MissCanuck]

This guy sure doesn't act like your friend, OP. True friendships don't come with this much drama and an attempt to "fix" someone else. He sounds like an arrogant tool.

 

Third-wheeling with a girl he does like was a terrible idea anyway, and would hurt you. It sounds to me as though you still like him and are angry and hurt it didn't go anywhere with him. Trying to be friends with a guy who is so dismissive of you isn't going to work, particularly when his attention is now going to be focused on another girl.

 

Yes, you should drop it here. This doesn't sound like much of a friendship anymore so I would let it go.

[ThatwasThen]

I asked him why he was so mean to me all this time and why he hated me so much. He said that, it was because I had a weakness. He told me that I had trouble standing up for myself and that the reason he was teasing me all this time, was so he could fix me.

Stay away from him. He's a bully and he's being mean to you because he wanted to be more then your friend but you didn't want that so now he is punishing you for hurting him. Who the heck does he think he is that he can "fix you" anyway. He's just mean, he's not a psychologist trained to do anything of the such.

 

You don't keep men in your life that try to "teach you a lesson" by disrespecting you and verbally abusing you. You leave them behind and you don't look back.

[DanZee]

I don't understand how you would think you had anything to do with breaking up the friendship. But you will find guys are good at blaming women for everything wrong in a relationship and a lot of women believe it. What he was doing was just a mind trick. You don't need him as a friend and now that he has another girlfriend, he doesn't need you anymore. There are plenty of other people to make friends with. Just move on.

[Wiseman2]

Sorry to hear this. He's not your bf or your friend. Avoid him and find some new friends and if you are ready to hang out with boys find nice boys.