Elusive 2nd Date

[annie24]

I haven't read all of the responses. But 1 date in a few months sounds like his interest level in dating you is very low, regardless of the excuse. Forget him and focus on the men who are asking you out and making an effort. Enjoy meeting the new guys on the dating site.

[annie24]

I am thinking about this situation differently and from a stronger place because of the consistent, sane evaluation of this situation so I appreciate all of the comments. I better recognize that he should’ve been able to at least create some time for me, many times over. I also recognize that I have been accepting fuzzy outlines of a plan from him; which ultimately he can’t or doesn’t do and that’s my fault for accepting that.

I am going to stop hoping to get together with him. If we do, now I’ve got this history of not getting together as part of who he is as fact. The rose colored glasses are off.

I’m now very happy I joined the dating site at least to give me perspective and options. I went on a date last weekend for drinks. It was completely asked for and set up for by the guy, the day before. It was a long drive for him to get to and he insisted on paying (I offered because I was five minutes late). On the date he was suggesting ideas for our future dates. It wasn’t a wonderful match for me and I texted him that the next day, to which he agreed and we wished each other farewell. I learned a lot of perspective from that one afternoon.

 

good to hear!! I know it sucks - I can relate to really feel like you've connected with someone on a first date and then for whatever reason, they disappear (or at least, the 2nd date doesn't happen). It really sucks when you finally meet someone you like and your hopes get raised and then nothing. Just hang in there. It's like when you have a good first interview at a job -- but don't have an official offer. You have to keep applying for other jobs until you have an offer in black and white on the table.