Lied to wife

[Darrtanus]

I lied to my wife about a job interview I was supposed to go to. The interview was set up and everything, but I canceled it because I dont want to leave my current job. My wife has been pressuring me to leave the job because she was fired from it under "suspect" reasons. My wife found out about my deception and is now not speaking to me. I feel I was right in wanting to stay with my current job, but handled the situation wrong. I am wondering how I can fix things.

[DanZee]

Well, you can try explaining it to her and then prepare to sleep on the couch for a few days.

[DaisyMayPorter]

Why was she fired? Did they treat her badly?

[Sportster2005]

Apologise for lying. Tell her firmly you're not leaving your job. Tell her she doesn't have to like it, but she has to accept it.

[DancingFool]

Time to sit down with her and have an adult conversation about work, bills, boundaries. Tell her firmly and directly that you will not be leaving your job and that she needs to respect that. Her getting fired has nothing to do with your employment nor can she demand that you quit in some vindictive fit. Also tell her that you will not tolerate her acting like a child and giving you the silent treatment in your marriage. This is actually abusive behavior and you need to call her out on it and nip it in the bud.

 

You've now learned that lying to avoid confrontation doesn't work and creates a bigger mess. So time to strap on a spine and some steel balls and address the problems head on and draw some rules and boundaries in your relationship in terms of what you will and will not tolerate from her. Honestly, you wouldn't be in this situation at all had you been firm and honest with her from the get go that you are not leaving your job and that she will need to respect that. Period.

[Minikimini]

I lied to my wife about a job interview I was supposed to go to. The interview was set up and everything, but I canceled it because I dont want to leave my current job. My wife has been pressuring me to leave the job because she was fired from it under "suspect" reasons. My wife found out about my deception and is now not speaking to me. I feel I was right in wanting to stay with my current job, but handled the situation wrong. I am wondering how I can fix things.

 

Own up to lying to her, but be adamant that you're not going to leave the job just because she was fired from it. That's on her, not you.

 

Are you certain, though, that your job won't come after you because you're married to someone they fired?

[abitbroken]

I think you should have gone to the interview. It doesn't mean that you had to take the job. Who knows, it could have been a much better position as far as money, work environment and fulfillment. Or just to see what's out there. You might not have been offered the job, too. It was a risk free situation.

[Flip00008]

Hey! I am glad to see you are reaching out for help. I have been married for 8 years now and have found that communication and honesty is a key to a healthy marriage. You stated in your post, that you handled the situation wrong. Does your wife know you feel that way? Have you and your wife considered seeking counseling or speaking to a pastor? I think it could benefit you both and strengthen your marriage. I will be praying for you guys. Hope to hear from you soon.