I'm really not a stupid girl..I swear!

[greenie35]

So..

I'm a little embarrassed to post this actually, but then again I made the decision and to be honest I don't regret it.

 

I met a guy at a bar not too long ago. He and I chatted and flirted and then I said I was leaving and he said ok, well I hope I see you again. A few weeks later I returned to the same bar with a friend of mine. He approached me and we chatted some more. We were heavily flirting and I was and still am very attracted to this guy. So...we went to my place and had a really really good night. THe morning was even better sitting around chatting eating breakfast and I drove him to his brothers house way out in the country...it was a gorgeous day. It seemed obvoius that this was just going to be a one night stand. Although there was a definite attraction he is just not the kind of guy I am looking for. He doesnt have a job, he is 3 years younger than me. He drinks probably a lot more than I do. Basically the guy just doesn't have a lot going on for himself. But I LIKE HIM!!

 

He was incredibly sweet to me, even the next morning. I ran into him again a week later..same place. He approached me and was at my side for the majority of the evening. Yet again, we returned to my place and spent the night together. He told me he loved me, I thought this was strange, but "I love you" can mean different things depending on the circumstances. I have my *beep* together. I go to school full time and I work about 30 hours a week. I have my own place, my own car and I've got goals. He told me that if he had known how much older then him I was he would have never approached me. That he would have been intimidated. He told me that I am different then other girls he has been with because he actually likes hanging out with me. In other words other girls he has been with he just walked out on in the morning. He tries to act like he's just a rollin' stone kind of guy, but always seems to interrupt himself when he goes off this way...It's like he realizes that he can't pull the wool over my eyes or something...I'm not a stranger to guys like him, and he realizes this. Sometimes it felt like he really liked me but he was fighting it...

 

I wonder if he is insecure...I wonder if he thinks he has nothing to offer me but really sees something special in me.

I am not at all interested in getting serious with him, unfortunately I was just looking for sex and he seemed completely ok with that. However he admits that he is a bit of a player. He seems ashamed of it...it seemed like I could read him so easily. He gave me his number (I did not have a phone set up in my new place yet) and I called him and he was kind of blah on the phone...that didn't bother me. Oh I called him before I saw him the second time...that's the only time I've called him. I don't really care to much about what develops. What I can't figure out is why it is I like him so much...perhaps its just the mystery of getting to know him for who he is instead of this facade he tries to pass off as his true nature.

 

So...yeah...im not a stupid girl. I can tell when a guy is just a prick or just wants sex. Well, I guess I jsut wanted sex plhhh. Either way, i feel like this guy likes me but is too proud to admit it...does that make sense...can anyone see the logic in this or am I just thinking too deeply on it? Regardless of all that I have no intention of seeing him again in that way. This is not characteristic behaviour on my part. I am not easy or anything like that. I don't particularly like acting on my sexual frustrations in that manner, but it just seemed like the right thing to do.

[Mun]

Well I'm not too sure what you are asking, but since you already know you don't want to see him again. Then try not dwelling on it too much... or you will find yourself with an unemployed/player boyfriend.

 

Sometimes a woman just wants sex --plain and simple. Give yourself that "out" and go on with your life.

[greenie35]

Yeah I in no way feel honored...nor do I have any hope of changing him. There is something to be said about being a person that makes a person want to change though Not that I hope to be that person. I was just curious as to whether he might have contemplated that based on what we discussed and just the way he acted when he was with me. I'm not "in" anything to "get out" of...so there's no decision to make there. I have had a one night stand before about 4 years ago that I tore myself up over. I think most women however promiscuous they might be and however liberated they claim they are, often feel a little bad when they engage in that sort of behaviour. I don't really regret it, but it still kind of pains me a bit to think that I was "that girl." I'm not losing sleep over it or anything. I understand my hormones a lot more now than I ever have before in my life.

[bluekey]

well.. it's hard to see make a good decision when your feelings are involved, and that is certainly the case here. You know that you like him, and you know that he likes you. Personally, I think age is nothing but a number, and shouldn't be a problem. However, if he is such a slacker, and you are looking for someone who is goal orientated, you might want to reconsider dating him. Because clearly, being with him gets you no where. I really don't think he is a player, a player never tell others that he is one. He might be just really want sex, if you are only looking for sex, then you should relax and enjoy each other, physcially....