citrusgreen Posted March 20, 2018 Share Posted March 20, 2018 Hi guys. Things have been going very well with my SO and me. (Thanks for your help along the way!) And at the end of this week we are going away on vacation along with his 2 daughters (age 11 and 14). (Brief background: I’m early 40s; he is 50. We’ve dated for 3.5 years, but in the past 7 months, after a short break, things have become come much more serious and committed between us and it’s going great. I’ve known his daughters for about 3 years; we’ve done some activities together and have been away on a few shorter, long weekend style trips, sometimes with other mutual friends involved. But I don’t see a whole lot of them in general, because he usually has them 2 nights a week and I generally give him his father-daughter time during those days/nights). Anyway, this will be a real, 10-day vacation. I’m excited but nervous. Looking for any tips from you guys in advance. For instance, I’m never sure how friendly and involved I should be with them, and in relation to their internal family dynamic, or if I should hold back more (my natural tendency, because I’m shy and cautious, is too hold back more, so as not to overstep my bounds — but I sometimes worry that comes across as too cold). One specific question. I’ve been working (as some of you know) on being more openly physically and verbally affectionate with him — and just to act more couple-y with him in general (because he wants this and has asked for it, and I want it too). I’m making some slow, subtle progress. But I’m wondering what the best way to conduct myself in front of his daughters. I really like his daughters and want to respect them, etc. I also really want things to continue to go well and move forward with my bf (he’s reiterated ,again recently, that we’re in an exclusive relationship and that he loves me and is taking our relationship seriously and wants to be with me for real and for the long term). PS: Their mom recently started seeing a man (possibly the first person she’s dated since their divorce 7 years ago). It is still the early stages, but his daughters have reported to my SO that they’re psyched about their Mom’s new guy and really like him. (I’m just reporting this to say that it sounds like the daughters are in theory open to their parents being with new partners—I’d like them to be happy with me as well!) Link to comment
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