mountainmomma Posted January 20, 2018 Share Posted January 20, 2018 My husband and I have been together for ten years (married for 1.5). I am a SAHM, and he is the breadwinner. We have an eight year old, and a three year old. We've got our problems, but a pretty nice life. He recently crushed my soul with one strange comment that I just can't seem to get over. It really changed things in my mind, and I'm not sure what to do-I can't stop replaying the stupid look on his face when he said it, and what he said...after returning home from the holidays, I worked REALLY hard to clean/organize the house and he was so happy(Our home is fairly normal, not immaculate, not too messy). He said, probably 5-6 times, how nice the house looked, then he had an epiphany. As a side note, money has been pretty tight around here for the past year or two. He said "I will SERIOUSLY reward you, if you keep the house clean, so you can teach our kids how to be clean and organized(he is a very organized person, which I appreciate)." It made me feel like we do not have a partnership, I am not an equal, the hard work I put in to be a good mother means nothing. And he took the joy out of having a clean home, because ever time I clean around our home now, I think of his stupid face, thinking he can reward me like a dog. I put my all into being a homemaker and mother, which obviously isn't enough to do something nice for me. I am so resentful, and the only thing I have to look forward to lately, is when my 3 year old goes to school next year, and I can hopefully get a part time job. I don't need to be rewarded by my husband for a job well done. I just want to be loved for the woman that I am. Honestly our other problems should bother me a lot more, but this just killed me. Maybe it was just the cherry on the cake. Any words of advice would be much appreciated, feeling pretty low. Thanks. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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