Jump to content

I really need help on getting my ex back


Recommended Posts

Hi, me and my ex boyfriend had broken up a month ago due to him losing his feelings and being really busy with work. He kept telling me that there's nothing I have done and I'm amazing but yet he's still lost feelings. I asked him if there's anyone else he's seeing and he kept saying no, now isn't the time for him to be in a relationship. We had been together for 3 years and had planned our future together. When he broke up with me my world went upside down, I was in depression I had lost so much weight I couldn't eat sleep or do anything and I had started self harming. I really thought he was the love of my life. Anyways, during this break up we still spoke sometimes, it wasn't anything like before. From time to time he'd ask me how I am etc (sometimes I feel like it was only because he felt bad about the fact I was in depression) we even met a couple times too, he had told me that he still loves me but just not like how he used to and there's a chance we might be together again in the future however he can't promise anything and he doesn't expect me to wait for him, when I see him it's obvious that he still loves me so much, he even kissed me I feel like he's hiding his real emotions and even said that our future was possible and doesn't want to lose me. Everything he says and does contradicts itself. He's even blocked me from all social media because he wants to move on. Yesterday we had agreed to meet up but he constantly makes excuses as to why he can't and I'm fed up of it, he told me to just leave him and find someone better . I sent him a long paragraph explaining that I'm going to walk away and how I get treated so badly etc. I don't think he expected it because I've always just chased after him but this time I didn't . He's read the paragraph but hasn't responded to me, I really want him back please help me what should I do?

Link to comment

You need to believe him when he says you should move on.


Nobody who truly wants a future with you would tell you that. I don't say that to be unkind, but it's time to start accepting that this is over. His actions are showing you that you are not a priority and he doesn't want to reconcile at this time.


You need to learn to live without him, for your own well-being. Break-ups are awful, yes. But going to the extreme of self-harming indicates there are much bigger problems. Do you have a trusted friend or family member you can talk to?

Link to comment

Seems like he is being really honest with you. This doesn't mean he doesn't feel affection for you. He does and is worried about your wellbeing and surely feels a bit guilty about you feeling this way. But that isn't the same as love.


I know it feels like the end of the world, but really it isn't. It just takes some time until you start feeling happy again and happy to be on your own.


Why are your hurting yourself? Have you done that before?


How old are you?

Link to comment

Sorry this happened. Unfortunately when a long term relationship ends, it has been contemplated for quite a while. "It's me, not you" is a common exit. Please cease all contact with him and block him from your phone and social media. Do not become the "crazy stalker ex".


In retrospect, what were the red flags and what do you mean by "treated badly" and what did he mean by "find someone better"? Please seek help for emotional issues and do not send him dissertations on your feelings and hurt.

He's even blocked me from all social media because he wants to move on.he told me to just leave him and find someone better.
Link to comment

You've got to stop texting this guy and stop meeting with him. You keep picking the scab of the relationship wound just getting it more and more infected. You can't heal until you finally end this relationship in your own mind and stop all contact. Forget about the excuses he's giving you. He's only trying to let you down easy and not have an argument with you when he says he still loves you and stuff. If you translate what he's telling you, he's saying he's not IN LOVE with you any more. Cutting yourself isn't going to get him back. You need to pick yourself up and move on.

Link to comment


This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.

  • Create New...