Online dating.. yes or no?

[bem72]

So, I've never tried online dating before and I am quite skeptical about it. I have Bumble, but I literally never reach out to anyone. I am starting to realize this might have to be the road I take if I ever want to meet someone.

 

So, how is online dating for those of you whom have tried it, successfully or not? I am so worried about meeting someone in person and they arent who they say they are. Or they are a ty person. I mean I guess thats the point of dating, but I am someone who gets hopeful/attached/hurt easily.

 

I also am not necessarily looking for anything right now, but someone to talk to would be nice. If the person comes around and changes the game thats all good with me though. However, I dont want to get anyone hopes up or hurt them, but I dont want to be a booty call either.

 

Anyways, I'm probably reading way too far into this, so personal experience, sites and other suggestions are welcome!

[vesper]

I would recommend ok cupid, that's where I met my husband. We dated for 2 years. Just make sure you are honest about what your looking for in your profile. AND it's free read my signature

[SherrySher]

The thing with online dating is, you have to have very thick skin and not believe everyone you talk to. What I mean is, there are many on those sites that are not genuine or are married and looking to have fun or are single and not willing to commit. It takes a lot sometimes to find a decent person and many just give in because it did not go well.

 

Yes, there are some that get lucky and find someone decent and end up being with them but more and more these days there are game players than decent ones.

I know that sounds negative, but it's the unfortunate reality.

 

You need to be smart about it, not jump in head first and don't take everyone's word for things. Really get to know someone and meet and then further get to know them well before you decide if they are genuine and worthwhile for a long term relationship.

Yeah, it takes work, but it's better to be sure than to have more disappointments and crap experiences.

[Coolstorybro]

If you're a women, sure.

[Starlight925]

The thing with online dating is, you have to have very thick skin and not believe everyone you talk to. What I mean is, there are many on those sites that are not genuine or are married and looking to have fun or are single and not willing to commit. It takes a lot sometimes to find a decent person and many just give in because it did not go well.

 

Yes, there are some that get lucky and find someone decent and end up being with them but more and more these days there are game players than decent ones.

I know that sounds negative, but it's the unfortunate reality.

 

You need to be smart about it, not jump in head first and don't take everyone's word for things. Really get to know someone and meet and then further get to know them well before you decide if they are genuine and worthwhile for a long term relationship.

Yeah, it takes work, but it's better to be sure than to have more disappointments and crap experiences.

 

This is a great post. ^^^

 

I've done online dating, off and on, for many years. I even married one! (divorced, but not because it was online). And my current BF of 1 1/2 years is from OLD (Online Dating). My prior BF (2 1/2 years) was also from OLD. So yes, I believe in it.

 

However, you have to kiss a ton of frogs, lol. Not just about bad guys, as there are so many bad girls there too, which is why so many are so jaded. The guys reach out to, say, 10 women, and they're lucky if they get 1 response. The women get a ton of messages, but are only interested in 1 out of 10 guys. Doing the math, it's no wonder people in general get so jaded.

 

The thing is, if you hang in there, you can meet some pretty nice people. My BF's best friend was "never" going to do OLD, and insisted on meeting someone "organically". A year after becoming single, and still waiting for his "organic" meeting to take place, he finally bit the bullet and put up a profile. He went out with a few nice girls, and is now, almost a year later, seeing probably the love of his life.

 

Here are the basics:

 

1) If you're on Bumble, swipe just about every guy that you think you might like, and if they message you, message them back soon. Do not play games!

2) Get on others as well. Tinder, POF, Match: pick 1 or 2, to widen your odds.

3) Meet a lot of people. It's only coffee/lunch/a drink. So what if he's not your ultimate love connection? I looked at it as a great way to try out new outfits, or new makeup, or try a new place.

4) Don't take each date too seriously. Don't go into it thinking this is your future husband! This is your future lunch. That's all it is.

5) Meet in public, during daylight hours if possible.

6) Never get in someone else's car, or give your home address, or your last name. No reason to Social Media them either. Just meet. Remember, they are putting themselves at risk too, by meeting you, a stranger. You are both just meeting for a drink. That's all it is.