She loves me, but she says its not working

[lostguy]

I have been dating this girl for 4 months now. We go to college together and are studying abroad together. Up until a few weeks ago the relationship has been progressing very quickly. Being so apart from home we spent lots of time together and its almost like not reality. Recently her single friends have challenged the relationship and have put all these ideas in her head. She says she loves me one day and the next wants to break up cause she says that I am not right for her and that our personalities clash. I tell her to stop listening to her friends cause misery wants company. She thinks they are right and that we should not be together. I love her very much and want her to be happy. I dont know what to do from here, should we break up completely, or slow down. We go home soon and I feel that the relationship will only get better but she disagrees. I do not want to loose the best thing that has ever happened to me.

[NewsGirl23]

well if I were you I would let her be, sometimes the hardest things to realize is that we have completely no control over how other people feel... I have been having to realize that myself lately. No matter how badly you want to make someone love you or think the way you think.. its completely impossible. If you feel the best thing that has ever happened to you is this girl then you need to let her go for a while. I know that sounds weird- but if its meant to be then she will come back and realize that yes you were a in fact making her life more pleasurable by being apart of it- I feel for ya - its a hard situation and it always sucks to be on the recieving end of something like this. I am going through the same thing kinda right now- not exactly but I am still feeling like crap.. haha. goodluck..

[discordant_verse]

Honestly, I have little patience with people who dont know what they want for themselves and allow others to walk them around. Particularly if its a gal I am interested in.

 

Since she is so wishy washy about the whole thing, I'd suggest you let her be and walk away. Saves you the heartache - though it begets another kind of heartache. Just tell her that since she doesnt think it'll work out, just be friends, she can find you anytime but you decide whether to give her the time of day. Change your expectations accordingly and just treat her as a friend or just walk away.

 

If she wants you enough, she'll come around looking for you. Otherwise, she just didnt.

 

DV

[Day_Walker]

Well if her friends have that much input in her life it does sound unfair to both of you. At best it would seem that she herself isnt sure about the relationship and she is using what her friends say to put her on that side of the fence. Obviously you dont want to break up and you have offered some suggestions as to what you think it would be best to do. Is it really your choice if she is the one that wants to break up, then thats whats gonna happen.

[lostguy]

well I told her how I felt about her and how much she means to me. Not to try to get her back or changer her feelings but because I knew I could not walk away without her knowing how I feel. She basically just beat me down and abused me emotionally and could not believe that I still felt the same way even after she did this. I wish I could stop loving her, but I cant. I guess I just miss my friend