Finally Meeting for closure

[UBC9]

Hello! Since finding this site I have read similar stories to mine and it's helped me

 

My BF and I moved in together after 8 months dating and it was amazing. We got along and fought sometimes but always worked through it. In Feb. we fought and things changed. I became more suspicious and he began hiding small things from me. I never thought any of this would happen, he constantly talked about marrying me and our sex life was incredible we were truly best friends but we fought as normal couples (he is also very impatient btw)

Long story short in May we fought and he spend a few days away from me.

He semi- moved out but most of his things are still here. I live in our apartment still

We missed each other and talked every night and I began wondering what we were, we decided to take things slow and "date"

He would take me out Friday nights but spend the rest of the weekend with friends or his parents home sleeping/relaxing. He says he can't do this with me bc I bother him and always want to go out and do things and never let him be

I don't agree with that I think it's OK to spend time relaxing but it's also the weekend! I want to go out and do things with my best friend (him)

2 weeks ago he calls me on his lunch break saying he's sad and begins to cry saying he's ruined our relationship from the beginning by being jealous/fighting with me/being angry and pretty much ended it.

I was destroyed and still am. I haven't seen him in maybe 3 weeks now

I am meeting with him this week to say my part. At this point I am so sad and confused. I'm living in our apartment seeing all his things and everything/store/activity reminds me of doing it with him.

I was not ready for this sudden break up and I want to be able to say my part too...

he is sweet and says I did nothing wrong but continues to be slowly agitated with me if we talk for more than 5 min on the phone (he is at work/gym/etc) and says we will talk about everything when we meet and I need to respect our agreement. The funny thing is that he is usually the one who calls me or texts me and if he has something to say I listen.

I have gone through a very hard time and I just don't know what to do about our meeting I miss him like crazy I dream about him and think about him all day. I cycle through sadness and anger, frustration, anxiety and then just numbness and get gitty when he texts me (every blue moon) then devastated all over again.

Am I just torturing myself with this meeting? He says he thinks about me too but I feel like this has taken a larger toll on me than him since I'm still in the place we used to call home. I haven't felt truly happy since I've been with him. I want to tell Him how much he hurt me but I don't want it to be a lecture. I want him to know how much I loved him and I recognize my own faults but I don't want to seem pleading

[luvedup]

If i was you id watch brad brownings videos on YouTube. He helped me a lot when my ex came to collect her stuff from my house. Instead of getting emotional and bringing up the split..we talked, laughed and flirted. We even kissed passionately before she left.. i am doing no contact again now though. Its the best advice you will get. Or go on breakupbrad.com