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My fiance of almost 16 years broke up with me. I am now 35 and have to move back to my mother's house. I have no savings due to us buying our home last June and he spent 8 months of the last year unemployed. We had our fights over the years but I truly love him and we always worked through problems. I thought we would be together forever. He says that he just is not in love with me anymore. He says he still loves me though. He works out of town during the week and only comes home on the weekend. I would like to stay at our house to care for our dog while he works. I hope that we can work things out between us. I am just so heartbroken and suck because if all this. I don't know if I should just walk away and let it go or try to fight for my relationship.

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Time to see a lawyer and sort out what's what as regards that house you bought together, and into which you have sunk your own money. Get your documents together and consult a lawyer.



Just to add, do NOT walk away from the house which you part-own. Do walk away from a dead-end situation.

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We have been engaged for the last 5 years.

We decided to buy a house instead of the wedding this ladt year. Technically I have no ownership in the house. The mortgage is in his name only, I just madethe first 8 months of payments. My credit was to bad to go on the loan. He wants me to move out. I'm just so upset at all this and I want to work things out but he doesn't.

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Forget the working out Ellie. That has to be a two/way street. He wants you out. Nothing further to be said.


You are entitled to that 8 months' money back. See a lawyer, please. The mortgage may be in his name only, but on the Deeds for the house, since you mentioned "we bought" is your name not on there.

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  • 3 weeks later...

I have made the decision to move out and move on. It is extremely hard as I still love him. But I know it's for the best. Today I am beginning to pack all of my belongings and 1 week from today I have enlisted several family members with trucks to help me move everything. I know this process is going to be difficult. I am hoping to find some peace when I get settled at my mom's.

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Good for you, OP.


It won't be easy but it sounds as though this needed to happen. Staying at the house would only push him to have to push you out. Leaving on your own accord is the far better option.


Perhaps staying with your Mom for a little while will do you some good. The first weeks after a break-up, especially after so many years together, are rough. Having your Mom around might be just the extra comfort you need right now. You can think about sorting out your own accommodations later, after the emotional dust has settled a bit.

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We talked the other night and he made me hurt for him. I thought everything was great between us for all these years when in reality he has felt we were drifting apart for the last 5 years. I was oblivious to this. I really wish he would have talked to me. Maybe we could have made changes to make us better. He also doesn't really want to breakup. He just needs a change in his life. I wished him well and hope that he finds happiness. I don't believe the issues were about me . I think he is going through somewhat of a crisis with himself. I am moving on Tuesday and it may take me a long time to get over this but I am moving on.

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