Meeting with my ex for first time in 3 months

[robin13]

So I met my ex after 3 months of not seeing her. We were in a 4 year relationship and lets just say it ended probably in the worst way you think it could end and then multiply that by 10. We went for a drive and parked up in a place where we used to make out (she gave me a cheeky smile as we turned in) lol anyway we were talking about what happened about me cheating and all our issues etc etc and she started crying her eyes out for ages and we held each other hands we hugged i kissed her and she just cried and cried and i told how much i loved her etc. She said maybe to getting back over summer/in a few years and that she wants to be with me but just cant because she doesn't trust me. I know myself I would never do it again. I asked her does she want me to commit to her and she said no which i was annoyed at but did respect her decision. That night I went out to a club and kissed a few girls and she found out and went crazy, I then asked her does she care and I will stop it if she wants and she said no she doesn't and she doesn't care if i kiss people. About a 3 days later I was out and met up with this girl in a club and one of her friends seen me and told her and she went pretty mdd again over whats app telling me not to speak to her again etc, this was the day after I asked her for dinner and she didn't reply. It's all very weird. I am moving on at the same time but I do think we are meant to be. She says she'll see me over summer, I didn't go on a exchange to Oz to try and make it work. Bit stupid but she I do think she Is the one. Advice? Bear in mind I got to her agreeing to seeing me through begging and pleading, haven't tried proper nc yet, she had me blocked on everything, told me she never wanted to see me again and literally called her mum everytime i contacted her, this was 3 months ago.

[greta96]

Same advice as in yesterday's thread.

[Keyman]

Honestly, people throw around the statement of 'I think she was the one' like it's sand at the beach.

 

If she was the one you would not have cheated on her. You would not have told her you wouldn't do it again and then gone kissed a bunch of girls.

 

Leave the poor girl alone, you are not worthy of her.

[kbbcoop77]

Leave her alone you imbecile. You cheat like it's nothing and expect her to accept it. Let her find someone worthy of a relationship because you aren't it.

[Raggie]

What I'm about to write won't make a lot of difference now, really.

But I hope you take it on board for your future relationships.

 

I believe people can change and often the remorse felt for a mistake can trigger that. What you should have done is taken time out from going out, pulling et al, and proved by your actions that you would put her first. Give her space but during that time act trustworthy and with integrity. You didn't do that.

 

Now, you will have to chalk this up as a learning experience. For her sake, don't reach out. I'd have a think why you feel compelled to go to other women when you're feeling c**ppy? You're feeling worse now, right? That needs addressing.

[robin13]

Trust me. I am.

[Wiseman2]

This is a logical fallacy very typical of the ones those who suffer from obsessional disorders (obsessional love, magical thinking, etc) have. You may benefit more from therapy than stalking and chasing someone at this point.

I am moving on at the same time but I do think we are meant to be.

[SherrySher]

Good lord...you know nothing about women or love or how to make either of them work. You need to mature and stop being a little boy. Chasing women and kissing on whoever and cheating etc, is ridiculous.

What did that foolishness ever bring you? Because I will tell you what, it sure won't bring you true love or anything sustainable. I don't blame this girl for running away. You're not ready for anything serious..you can't even be serious.

And FYI..she keeps telling you she doesn't care what you do because she knows you'll keep acting like an immature man who can't be counted on to act responsibly. If she could, you wouldn't have done even one of those things, never mind all of those things. *shaking my head*

[JoeyD2000]

Pretty sure if she was the one you would not of cheated on her.

 

Move on & let her be.

 

It's likely it is your ego you're more concerned about. If you got her back you'd probably cheat on her again & it's no challenge.

 

Use this as experience for the future. Playing with peoples minds is not cool.