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What does this even mean?


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Just a little bit of a backstory before I begin, my ex girlfriend of 2.5 years broke up with me a little over a month ago claiming she was unhappy and needed to figure herself out. This all came out of the blue and about 6 months ago we had a little breakup of 2 weeks and during that time she was in a rebound relationship with this guy and every time I saw her she bragged about having sex with this guy and how great he was etc. Eventually she came back saying she was stupid and didn't know what she was thinking and was all over me for these past months leading up to this and even in December saying how happy she was with me and I'll all she will ever need until suddenly out of the blue this happened.


So yesterday I managed to take her out to dinner and before we left she was saying to me how she has no idea where her mind is at and how she is having a midlife crisis practically (at an age where this is the last thing on someone's mind) and how one day she says something and 3 days later she could be saying and feeling the complete opposite way. She went on sying she thought it was me making her unhappy (From what I knew she was happy with me but whatever) then she said she still felt unhappy so she thought it was other people around her one being her mother, then she said that she believes it is school and having to work and its a lot so she is finishing school up early and then she said she is moving to a different state with people she works with. A week before this, she mentioned that I should move there as well but that is really weird to me considering we wouldn't be living together nor would we be together so clearly that's a bad idea and quite strange. She also said that if she doesn't like it she would move back here and that she would be back for like a weekend a month to see everyone. A little later I told her to tell me whether or not there was any chance of us being together in the future or none at all. All she said was she cant see into the future. So what does that mean? There isn't a chance because if there isn't just tell me" Again she just said the same thing.


My guess is she is finally having freedom in her life and is enjoying it but also she is hanging out with these people so she doesn't feel lost and trying to make herself forget about being lost mentally. I describe it almost like when someone dies and someone starts to drink to sort of forget about it and trick themselves into being happy but instead of someone being dead and drinking it is this.


Then we finally left on our way to the place to eat and on our way there I noticed that she seemed like she was uncomfortable in a way or had something on her mind. I asked her what was up and she said nothing she just felt like I was feeling weird (which clearly wasn't the case she just had to come up with an excuse) I let her be but I knew something was up because she always puts her hands inbetween her legs when they sweat and she is nervous or thinking something and or bites her lip (she did both). A few moments later she brought up that she thinks she will be very happy in the new state and I told her good I'm glad but also asked her why she said that she would move back if she didn't like it there. Her response "I dont know" Then I asked her why she said one minute she thinks something and later it is different. Again I got the respnse "I don't know" Almost as if she were trying to keep the lost feeling away.


At the restaraunt we are eating and my eyes started to wonder and she asked me what I was looking at. I told her nothing and this happened twice more" We chit chatted a bit more and then got some togo boxes and told her to put what she doesnt want in the box because it seemed like she was done eating. She got sort of offended and said she wasnt done and why I was in a hurry like I had somewhere to be. I told her "I might be doing something later but if you're not done then finish up and eat" She got sort of jealous and got up and as she stood up i saw she had a bitter face and asked what was up and she said "you don't want to be with me" I restated what I told her to finish up and eat so obviously that wasnt true and she still had the bitter attitude. Then on our way out I told her to put on my coat and she said no so i told her agian and so she did and as she did she was smiling and blushing. On our way out of the building she asked me if she and her coworkers could come in and eat where I work. I didn't know what to say considering it would be pretty inappropriate of her to do that since I know she has slept with one of them. In my moment of silence she said that she wanted them to know who I was. I was completely shocked at this since before they knew nothing of me and she pretty much avoided telling them about me so I said "Oh now they can know?"




As we started driving away we started flirting and she started blushing and smiling and laughing and what not and a few moments later she said "I'm afraid youre going to be a man " I told her what does that even matter to her since we arent together and she said it again and agian i said the same exact thing. Again the flirting coninued and I asked her if she wanted to do something again this weekend or whatever and she said "If youre not too busy" jealously. Again back to the point in the restaraunt when I said i might do something later.


This is where she starts trying to make ME jealous after she ws jealous herself. Also during the car ride she was leaning towards me so our arms would touch on the center console but earlier on our way to eat she had her arms like i said in between her legs and close to her.


Then we started flirting again and making her laugh and smile etc and again a few minutes later she brought up moving by saying "I'm gonna need a new swimsuit for the beach" I just said yeah casually not giving into her mind tricks into try to make me jealous because obviously she knew that it kind of stings hearing that. Then again back to laughing and smiling and she mentions a good time or two we had together and I made her laugh more and then brought up this one time where she tried to have sex with me in a hospital (long story don't ask) and we talked and laughed about that and then again she brought up something about her moving Im gonna assume to try and keep it in my mind and make me say something about it. Then she when we almost are back she starts showing me pictures of where she looks really great in and i say you look good in that one and show me another and i say it again and shows me a few more but i din't say anything to those and then with this sort of snotty tone she says "Oh, sorry". I said for what and she didnt say anything and brought up when she was at these coworker's apartment (she is hardly at her home anymore again i think to try and suppress how she doesnt know where her head is still. Might I add these people are bad news and I told her this when we were dating how i realized she was starting to act a little different) saying "I heard someone having sex last week while i was there" I said something like thats gross or something. A normal response. Then she says "I feel bad about having sex in someone else's house" (bragging about she had sex with someone like i mentiond she did in before to make me jealous and for me to say something about it) I acted like it didn't effect me and like I heard it but didn't care and brought up what she wanted to do this weekend and then we arrived back and dropped her off and then went pn our way for the night.



So what the heck?! On our way back she was jealous, then she wanted to make me jealous but all in the meantime we were flirting and she was laughing and blushing and even brought up good times and sex with me.

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She is all over the place and will take you for a ride for as long as you allow it. She broke up with you to sleep with another guy, bragged about it and you still took her back. At that point you showed her that your feelings don't matter / she can walk all over you and that's what she has been doing. She is going to keep mistreating and disrespecting your feelings for as long as you allow it. At this point you are her plan b, her emotional safety net until she finds someone else / figures out where to go. If she was a quality person she wouldn't have done any of this. She has zero empathy for your feelings. I realise that you love her, but she is no longer the person you fell in love with. She has changed. It is YOUR responsibility to man up and drop her. Allowing disrespect like that is not going to get you anywhere good. The moment someone is hurting/disrespecting you, you need to get out NOT humor them and go along with it. Actions speak louder than words. She has become selfish and toxic. Blaming other people for HER actions is pure denial on your part. She has a choice. She is choosing to do all these things. You need to wake up and stop rewarding her hurtful behaviour. Drop her before you end up with no self-esteem. And raise your standards/ decide on your dealbreakers. Hint: Bragging to your face about sleeping with others is definitely one.

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Sorry this happened. It wasn't out of the blue at all you saw this coming before from her need to be free and date other guys. She sounds immature how old is she?


Sounds like she wants to move on giving you the 'confused" excuse but is stringing you along in the friendzone for now. At this point it sounds like games.

she was unhappy and needed to figure herself out. 6 months ago we had a little breakup of 2 weeks and during that time she bragged about having sex with this guy and how great he was etc. she has no idea where her mind is at and how she is having a midlife crisis All she said was she cant see into the future.My guess is she is finally having freedom in her life and is enjoying it but also she is hanging out with these people so she doesn't feel lost and trying to make herself forget about being lost mentally.she thinks she will be very happy in the new state
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Its simple. She wants the freedom to sleep with other people if she so desires. She does not want you to have that same freedom so will likely try to keep you roped in and be jealous if she starts losing your attention. Later you will discover that she is sleeping with someone else and then she will defend that by saying you two broke up. You will be more hurt and confused that you are today. /nostrodamus moment


I hope you make the right choice.

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