UH-OH!! HE CALLED....WHAT SHOULD I DO???

[esboogie143]

Well I have been very good. No calls, no emails no anything and look what the cat brought in...The one who didnt want anything to do with me rejected my every call and humiliated me every time....yes...u got it the infamous ex of mine. I was on the phone last night when my someone beeped into my line...i tell my girlfriend to hold i click over and say hello...he says hello? (very somber) Now instead of just hanging up I said whats up...like if he was just anyone(strongly might I say) he was like i just wanted to say that im sorry for all the mean things that i said to you and im just reallly sorry...he was like thats all i wanted to say...i was like gotta go he said bye and i clicked over....all of a sudden another beep i said "hello" he said I just wanted to get something off of my chest...Thank you for all you have done for me and all that u would've done. And I will miss you. After that I said I gotta go and just clicked off.

 

What the hell do I do now. I think I handled it well. I gave him what he wanted NC and look at him now. Now im thinking did i do the right thing? Will he ever call again? Now im just thinking! I know I should still not call/email him...right? I need some advise...this is very hard for me...THANKS

[Beec]

esboogie,

 

You should not call or contact him unless and until you can really control your emotions around him. If you saw him and he was charming, would you fall right back in with him, and end up seeing him walk out again, or would you be able to resist?

[Luscious]

Im really proud of you I know that it probably took alot to not show any emotions when he called but you did it!!! Now don't do anything to mess up your no contact, he called, thats fine, give him what he wanted..NC...he's now missing you or what the relationship shared but don't fall into his arms again.

 

Be strong you can do it!!! If you can get over this, you can get over anything.

[DN]

I agree with Beec. It could also be that what he said was simply the truth. That he wanted to clear his conscience for the hurt he had caused you and needed to apologise for it so that he could move on. I would read no more into it than that, and continue the no contact. If he continues to call, then you may have to consider what course of action you want to take.

[arwen]

I agree with DN, and think you handled that phone call really well girl! I am proud of you

 

Buy yourself a big box of chocolates as a reward 8), and continue to stay strong in no contact. You will be just fine.

 

Ilse.

[Beec]

It could also be that what he said was simply the truth. That he wanted to clear his conscience for the hurt he had caused you and needed to apologise for it so that he could move on. I would read no more into it than that, and continue the no contact. If he continues to call, then you may have to consider what course of action you want to take.

 

DN is right. Let's think about this. He broke up with you, and you continued to contact him. You went out with him a few weeks ago, and ended up with him staying overnight, then he told you he was using you. Still, you wanted him right back. HE said you should go slow, not YOU. Anytime he wants back in, you let him come back in. So he picks you up and drops you as he feels the need. When he has not seen you for a little while, he feels like he wants a little attention, so he calls. Then he gets it, and maybe a little something-something, and he feels guilty for taking advantage of you, because he know you will let him and he did not use any will power. So he has some guilt and does not want to have it again, so he does whatever he has to to drive you away. It may hurt you know, but at least he won't feel guilty for using you again.

 

So, recently he has really driven you off. Maybe his having another woman was a lie just to run you off. Finally, you get that you should leave him alone and do so. Now he feels guilty for hurting you and wants to apologize.

 

Just a possible scenario. I have been in a on and off relationship in which she wanted me forever and I did not feel the same way. I felt guilty for taking advantage of her, so I would end it. Then we would see each toehr and could not keep our hands off each other. So we would date some, then I would felt guilty and end it. Then . . . Finally, I moved away.

 

It does not change the fact that he wanted to end it. LEAVE HIM ALONE.

 

Finally, you had a fairly long relationship with this guy right? The questions you should be looking at trying to answer are why he wanted to end it, why did his feelings toward you change? Until you can figure out real answer to these questions, and you should be able to based onhow the two of you acted over time, then you have no business trying to see him, unless you can really control yourself and just act like a friend, even if he is really charming and making moves on you.

[esboogie143]

Thank you all for ur well taken advise. I have to think about this thoroughly about my situation and will reply later on with what I came up with with regard to him and my actions. I am just a little confused right now.

[hecka_bekah]

Hey! I just wanted to comment on his apology. If your ex really meant what he said, he wouldn't expect you to act like nothing happened in the first place. He needs to regain your trust by apologizing through his actions.

 

I think you handled the situation very well! You were kind to him as you always were, yet you showed him that you can have a life without him by ending the phone call soon! Your actions have made you a little bit stronger!

[vhshowdown]

Esboogie143, i think you did really good. You should be very proud of yourself and hold your head up high for you actions. Alot of times when they tell you they want NC is to get a reaction from you, whether it be mad, jealousy, whatever. Almost to make them feel better about themselves.

 

It is totally up to you if you are ready to talk again. If you decide to, take it very slow, and DO NOT TALK ABOUT THE PAST!!!!!! OR A RELATIONSHIP, just talk about getting to know one another again!!

Or if you decide to wait until you are ready again, that would be fine to.

Do what makes you happy and feel comfortable with!!

 

Good Luck!!!

[esboogie143]

Thank you all!! Im sorry but im just speechless with everything! All I can say is thanks for all ur concerns

[hurtwou]

ok you messaged me and wanted me to reply to some of your posts. This may not be what you want to hear. But dont let him back in your life, he wanted no Contact you gave it to him, and now he thinks that because you are strong, he can march right back up into your life, and play games again. Seriously guys can be so stupid. They think all girls are made for games, and when they hurt you, they think they control you, but there are alot of strong girls out there who doesnt put up with that kinda crap. Be one of them, ignore him, when he calls tell hi....you wanted Nc you got it, live with that mistake...goodbye! Hang up, which it will be hard, but have have self respect for yourself, and youll go along way in life...