So, NC it is! At least on my part.

[ClaireDarling]

So, after he sent that message stating that he's going through a lot and that he's not in the best place for a relationship, I kind of took that as, "You're nice, but I don't think I like you that way."

I told him that and I told him if he's trying to push me away, he's doing a pretty good job of it and I'll leave him be. He said that that's not at all what he's trying to do and that he is into me and that I'm amazing, but he just can't take on a full relationship right now.

 

I told my guy friend what happened and sent him the texts and he said if he was going through all that crap, that there's no way he would be able to focus on a relationship.

 

So, I'm in this weird place. I don't want to just move on, but I also don't want to wait around for something that may never happen.

 

I haven't deleted his number and I haven't blocked him or unfriended him from Facebook or snapchat. But I don't think I'm going to bother talking to him. If he wants to talk, he can come to me, but as far as I'm concerned, NC might work he best for me in this situation. That way nothing else is said and no feelings are hurt.

 

One thing that did irritate me was that he kept saying, "I'm sorry for hurting you." I know he meant well, but he didn't hurt me. I'm not a fragile puppy. And I don't want him to think he has that sort of power over me. I told him I'm not hurt. That I just hope it won't be a repeat of last things. He never responded to that and that was about at 10pm last night.

[Wiseman2]

After getting the "too busy for a relationship" line after a hookup, you should definitely go no contact and block and delete him.

 

Why? Because he stated he's too busy for a relationship, not to busy for random sex. He may contact you for again under the guise of "things aren't so hectic at the moment", then after the hookup he'll be be too crazy/busy again.

I haven't deleted his number and I haven't blocked him or unfriended him from Facebook or snapchat. But I don't think I'm going to bother talking to him. If he wants to talk, he can come to me, but as far as I'm concerned

[ClaireDarling]

I've already come to the conclusion that if he does want to hang out again, it will be a formal type of date. No hanging out at each other's places. If he can't handle that, then I most certainly will block him.

[boltnrun]

He wants a casual sex thing, on his terms and on his timeline.

 

He'll contact you saying he wants to see you, he misses you, etc. He'll suggest "hanging out" again, which means "hey, I haven't had any in a while and since you're willing, how about some sex?"

 

He doesn't want to date or be a boyfriend.

 

If what you want is to date, don't demote yourself to Occasional Sex Partner.

[HeartGoesOn]

.....................

[HeartGoesOn]

I'm not sure what the point of going "NC" is when this was just a hang out/hook up situation, and never involved dating? What are you expecting to achieve?

[ClaireDarling]

It just didn't seem that way. That's why this feels weird.

 

I've had my share of guys that only want to hook up. Conversations typical revolve around sex. His never did.

He could have just been buttering me up, but he was the original one that mentioned a relationship. He was the one who asked me how I felt about monogamy. He's the one who initiated hand holding in public. He's also the one who told all his friends about me and said the girls wanted to meet me. He's also the one that invited me on a family trip if I was able to go.

 

It just felt different and I know guys go to all sorts of lengths to get what they want, but he just seemed different.

 

And I meant NC for me. I have a tendency to not let things go and let them fester.

 

The thing is, I don't know if I want a boyfriend. If he asked, I would have said yes because I enjoy his company, but at the same time that's in any format. As friends, as FWB, or as boyfriend and girlfriend. I just enjoyed him.