People who Jump from Relationship to Relationship

[qwaspolk82]

What do people think about someone who jumps from relationship to relationship? I just noticed a friend of mine (not very close someone I knew from growing up/high school) apparently just broke up with her boyfriend and father of her daughter. She didn't right out say it but she did the usual meme posts people do when they break up. This was last week. Then this week I noticed she posted a meme about "when you find the right guy" or something cheesy like that. Someone mentioned a guy by name. I looked at his page and realized that's someone I graduated with which was odd but then noticed he had on his page "in a relationship" with this girl.

 

No it doesn't affect me but I've been seeing too often people I am friends with and close or know who have kids, who end a relationship and then start dating someone right away. My former friend (and ex sister in law) she hadn't dated seriously from the time her baby daddy went to jail until she got married. I thought that was reasonable that she didn't bring these guys around her daughters but she still went out and met guys. Then she met this guy she married and within a month after dating him they're engaged. He was practically moved into her house within two weeks of meeting him. To me that's dangerous when you have kids. He isn't from around that area let alone the state. He's from New Mexico. He's about eight years older than her and has a daughter with kids and she's not much younger than my ex sis in law. (His daughter was born when he was like 15).

 

The age wasn't what got me it was that she let this strange man into her home who she barely knew when for the like five or so years before that she didn't bring any guys home. Then I see this girl do it and I have just noticed friends doing this who have kids. It just boggles my mind that anyone would put that over their kids. Add to the fact no one in her family or her friends like him. If it was just me I'd be ok. But not one person who has met him likes him. He gives off a creeper vibe. I think they saw what happened with me and don't want her to push them away so they don't say anything to her. She has threatened to move to NM with him and take the girls. I really hope there's nothing bad going on but those girls act different since he's been there the last 3 years and not in a good way. The oldest is super quiet and others have noticed. Someone did call CPS on her last year. I heard it was her mom or her ex's mom but I don't know. Those girls have been nieces and called me aunt since they could talk and are my daughter's cousins. I worry about them more than her.

 

I have a daughter. I've been divorced for a year. Yeah I got back with my ex husband for a few months after he got out of rehab but he didn't move in with us again. He would come on the weekends but that ended because he relapsed and I'm not going near that. But I don't think I would bring a guy around my daughter for a good six months or more. Maybe I'm too cautious or I've seen too many shows. But I don't trust even her father alone with her let alone some strange man I barely know.

 

Maybe I'm too independent so I can handle being alone better than most. I have no urge to date in the last year. First I don't have the time. My daughter's medical issues take up a lot of time. I have a nurse come so I can work out a few days a week or go shopping. But I just don't think it would be fair to try dating someone when I can't give it the time needed. And I don't want to end up getting suckered by some perv.

 

I just started to think about it more after I saw that person post and just thought why do people put dating over their kids? It's not worth the risk to me.

[Webb0108]

My ex wife of 15 years and 3 kids split with me and 4 months after i moved out she was seeing some one else so i guess sometimes you dont mean as much to some one as you thought you once did..but i understand sometimes that they are only trying to be happy again maybe the wrong way to do it but it is what it is i suppose..

[gebaird]

It can be hard for some people to find a good balance between following their heart and following their head. In the end, they get to make their own choices, but dysfunction often shows up in relationships and one way to avoid facing those issues is to keep moving from one person to the next. In my experience, entering a relationship too soon after a breakup generally leads to problems. But some people are more afraid of being alone than being with the wrong person.

[DancingFool]

Personally, I think that it's someone who can't be alone and as a result isn't very particular about who they get with so long as they are with someone. Sometimes it works out for them as in they stumble into a good relationship with a good person, but more often than not, they end up in terrible relationships and stick with them for too long.

[thejigsup]

I'm usually the kind of person who is very happy being single. I seldom have those "I'm lonely" or "I miss being with someone" feelings. I truly prefer being single most of the time. However, I have jumped from one relationship quickly to another one a couple of times. It wasn't what people who are dumped often feel, that I "needed" to be with someone. Far from it. NEWSFLASH: Sometimes you just meet someone awesome shortly after a breakup who is better for you than your ex. Both of these relationships lasted many, many, years. So, no, sometimes these people just meet someone better suited for them. With kids, yeah, you shouldn't do that ever. I never did. But when I was single? Yep. No harm, no foul.