Non-traditional Student in a new city...

[therealjames]

It's been a less-than-ideal first 3 weeks of the fall semester and I DO NOT want this trend to last the rest of the semester/year/degree.

 

I made a couple friends, but it all seems so foreign to me. I am a 25 year old male, the majority of the people I'm in class with are 19-21. I have no problem meeting girls and stuff, regardless of age, but I do seem to be having a lot of trouble making friends to hangout with.

 

The couple friends I did manage to make were also transfer students, but they joined a fraternity and just about every night they have something going on that I'm not able to attend. I would have joined the frat for engineers as well, but, their "rush" activities fell on two class nights and a weekend during which I had drill for the Air Force Reserves. I know I could have probably tried harder but I really didn't know what the fraternity was all about. Turns out, it's for making friends. Too late for me.

 

Anyways, I am having a hard time relating to a lot of the "kids" that I go to school with. I know that I need to stop viewing them as kids and start looking for more similarities. It just seems like everyone already has their friend groups and no matter where I go, everyone is walking in pairs or threes and it's usually just me. The people I've exchanged numbers with over the past few weeks usually don't text me. I'm always reaching out to them to see what's going on if they want to hangout. I just went through 8 people and everyone has other plans for the day/night. I don't want to go through another weekend sitting at home.

 

I am a smart guy, my incoming GPA is 3.83 which is high for engineering. I have zero motivation to even continue studying at this point. It's only been 3 weeks, yes, but I can only see this dragging on and it's starting to scare me. I've never been so unhappy before.

 

Does anyone have any suggestions for someone going back to school either as a veteran or otherwise? On relating to other students and making friendships? I've always done well with making friends with coworkers since I've basically worked for the past 13 years, but this seems so much different to me and I want nothing more than to feel more involved. After leaving the military I've lost that feeling of belonging and although there are thousands of students around me, I've never felt more on my own than I do right now...

[Wiseman2]

I would skip the frat house kid stuff as well and focus on more professional groups and joining up with more military groups. See what's on campus and particularly off campus.

the Air Force Reserves.

[lukeb]

I would skip the frat house kid stuff as well and focus on more professional groups and joining up with more military groups. See what's on campus and particularly off campus.

 

I would try to get involved in something around an activity whatever you may be interested in and see if there are groups or clubs in the area either on or off campus.

[Rising100]

I would also skip the frat houses too, focus on your own stuff and do your own thing.

People will come to you. I do well alone and still attract people.

[therealjames]

Yeah, I guess I'm just getting a little impatient.

 

It's been harder to make friends than I thought it would be.

[Wiseman2]

What about a part-time job off campus?

It's been harder to make friends than I thought it would be.

 

]

[therealjames]

I have been thinking of a part time job, I would prefer volunteer to that though just because I am taking 18 credits to try and make up for classes that didn't transfer.

 

I have a job for between semesters, I am now a reservist (1 weekend per month), in class M-F from 8 am to 9 pm 2 days per week and 8am-5pm 3 days per week...not much room for a job at this time.

 

The problem with off-campus folks is that I will be spending 95% of my time on campus for the next 2.5 years.