Need some quick advice

[justme123]

Okay, so I've been thinking I'll call my ex-girlfriend up sometime soon. Just to re-establish contact with her and see how she is doing, kind of just to see what she says or what her reaction is to hearing from me.

So what I need some advice on is if I should call her tomorrow, because tomorrow is a specific day, it would have been our 2 years anniversary tomorrow, if we hadn't broke up. My question is just if it would be a good/bad idea to call her on that day?

Please let me know what you think, thanks!

-justme

[SilverManic]

How long have you two been split? Was it an emotional break up? Did you dump her or the other way round? I wouldn't be able to pass jugement but I don't think you should call her on your 'ment to be two year' because she might snap at you and get really touchy. Maybe call her a few days after?

GL,

~S.

[tanned_production]

I dont think that would be a good idea... call a few days after. Both of you probably have some weird feelings left from the break up... and just reminissing (sp?) about it won't help anything.

 

Give her a couple days... good luck!

[justme123]

SilverManic,

We've been split for about 6 months or so. It was definetely an emotional break up and she was the one who broke up with me.

 

You think it would be unwise to call her on that day?

I'm not planning to call her to try to get back together with her, although I do still want to be with her I don't want to be the one to initiate that idea. But I would be hurt if she snapped at me or something like that.

 

Thanks for your response!

[tanned_production]

Yeah, even if you arent trying to get back together with her... tomorrow could be an emotional day for both of you.

 

Keep us updated

[rainy soul]

justme123,

do not call her on your could have been 2year anniversary...you say that you are not trying to get her back and yet your writing in the "getting back together" forum. Although I'm sure your intentions are good in trying to contact her all your going to end up doing is showing that you are still hung up to some degree on her. You might be calling wondering if you should because its would have been 2years only to find that that was the last thing on her mind. I think if you really want to see how she's doing you should wait a few days and then call. I also wouldn't bring up the missed special occasion because like others have said that might just bring up sad or even worse weird feelings from her towards you and you definitely don't want that! take care, good luck!

[Marko]

STAY AWAY!

 

if you want her back, don't do it. You must accept the fact that it is not going to happen.

 

If you are in her thoughts, she'll call you, but why put yourself thru misery again.....you know that will happen.

[justme123]

Thanks for all the advice. I think it would definetely be a bad idea to call her today based on what everyone has said. I'm not sure if I'll call her in a couple days or how long I'll wait before calling her.

 

rainy soul, I am trying to get back together with her, but what I meant was that this phone call is not intended to try to get her back. What I want is to re-establish contact and give her a way to get in touch with me if she wants to because she doesn't have my phone number anymore. Plus it will be nice to just hear her voice and how she is doing.

 

Marko, what fact are you saying I need to accept is not going to happen? I'm not really sure what you meant. The thing with letting her call me first is that she no longer has my current phone number and if she has tried to call me she would of gotten a "phone service disconnected" type message. If I call her I get to give her my new number and that way I'll know that if she did want to call me she would be able to. Also I'd like to know how she's doing, etc.

 

Thanks for the great advice, it's been very helpful to me!

-justme

[just jeff]

I would wait, but not too long...if you think she is reaching out to make contact. If you feel its a tactic to hurt you again...then postpone it until you're strong enough to withstand it. I have tried it all...NC and minimum contact...sometimes the connection is stronger than our will. Good luck.

[rainy soul]

Hi justme123,

Sorry I didn't realize that you are trying to get her back. In that case you definitely are right in your desicion to not call her for a few more days. Also be prepared to face the possibility that if you give her your number she may not try and contact you further...I don't mean to be mean but if she really wanted to get in touch with you a new phone number would not be the biggest obstacle to overcome. There was a guy I dated years ago who I met once by chace didn't really have any friends in common with and who spent three weeks tracking down my number going only off of my first name. Just something to think about! Good luck though and keep us posted on how the call goes!