Girlfriend pulled a 180.

[Chauncey32]

My girlfriend (22) and I (25) were together for about 2 years. We talked of marriage, children, and buying a home. She was the sweetest and least complicated girl I have ever been with. I had my time in college, being crazy and wasting time with terrible women, and she was it for me. I was done, I had found the love of my life. We moved in together after 6 months (her idea), and I had never been happier.

 

About four months ago, something started to change in her. She became distant and cold. I no longer felt love in our home, but more an annoyance of my being there. I continued to ask her what was going on, and she continued to tell me she was stressed because of school. (She was finishing her junior year of college, and I am a full time worker already in a career.) I put forth more effort to assist her in studying, tried to make dates to help her relax, and put more and more effort into her to make her happy. She just wasn't there. The girl I loved more than anything was disappearing in front of my eyes, and nothing I did would help.

 

After all of this effort, I then decided to try and back off. This too, did not work. She had made new friends at her job, and wanted to spend more and more time with them, and less with me. This did not phase me at all, until she began texting one co worker continuously. I sat her down, and explained I was feeling insecure about it, and wanted to know if there was anything to worry about. I'll never forget the words "it's not my job to make you more secure, you Need to do that yourself." Now, I know this. I get it. However, to feel so shut down and have your feeling so disreguared in a moment of vulnerability..the words still ring in my head.

 

Flash forward to about two weeks ago, and we have dinner plans. She texts me and cancels, saying her dad wanted to take her to dinner. That's fine. Family first. I just asked her to let me know when she would be home. I don't hear from her until 10 that night, saying she will be home. When she got home I said "late dinner?" And it was on. She was yelling about me not giving her space, how she doesn't know if she loves me anymore, and how I need to "get out of her apartment."

 

I cried. I didn't understand. I was all around pathetic. I left for the night and stayed at a friends, hoping to talk after she calmed down. Now, she won't speak to me. She doesn't seem sad. She is just done with me.

 

I'm heartbroken. I thought we had a future together, and she saw me as replaceable. I've since moved into a new apartment. I've settled in there. But my thoughts won't go away. Will she come back? What did I do? What the hell just happened? Should I try and call? All questions running through my mind.

 

Instead of reaching out to her, I find myself here. I know there is no way for anyone to tell me what happened. But damn, has anyone found themselves in this situation? Is there anything I can do?

[Ms Darcy]

The thought of reporting to someone everyday for the rest of your life for a 22 year old is overwhelming. I think she's probably too young for forever.

 

Right now, I think you are in different places in life and there is nothing you can do about that. I'm sorry.

[kamurj]

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