feeling at a crossroad with my life

[photograph11]

Hey Ena,

 

I'm at a crossroad with my career and life at the moment.

 

 

I graduated about 2 years ago from university with a psychology degree. At the time, I applied to a few masters but didn't get in. So I continued working at this job I had during school throughout the year. Throughout that year, I thought of all the careers and graduate studies I wanted to pursue. I stumbled upon social work since I really enjoy working with the elderly. But I would of had to do either a master's or a bachelor's. I got accepted for the bachelor's at two universities but as I got accepted I got promoted at work to a 55k a year job.

 

So I thought about continuing my studies but I didn't want to go another 3 years at school to make less money than I'm making now. And I sort of enjoyed the job I have now. And I was ready to move out and be on my own and the job I have now allows me to do that.

 

So I decided to stick with the 55k job. At the time I enjoyed it and after I got it permanently I decided to take a big step and buy my own home.

 

I was really happy and I have enough money to support myself and I will be moving soon. However, I've recently ever since the xmas holidays, have started to become bored and feel dead at work. I can't wait until the day ends, that I feel that I just don't belong in this workplace. I feel I have so much potential, that I generally feel unfulfilled at work. And I started thinking about going back to school and pursuing a career such as social work. I don't see myself being in this place for the rest of my life.

 

But if I go back to school, I won't be able to have my own home. I would have to continue staying with my parents for another 3 years and sell my property. I'll be 28 when I leave my home, and there is no rush for me to leave, I really feel I'm stuck in between both decisions.

 

Even if I pursue my studies by the time I'm done, it can take a long time before I make as much money as I'm making now.

 

I then have another issue. Going on my own is something I wanted for a while. My parents are okay with it. But they get offended when I tell them that I want my space and want to be on my own. I think it's normal at 25. My mom goes to my sisters place when she isn't there and cleans up her apartment and touches her stuff. She means well but I don't want that at all. I want my privacy. She was very insulted when I said that. My parents then started insulting my friends and calling them losers because for some reason they feel like I'm more open about my life to my friends than them. I just want to be on my own and do my own thing but it bothers them that I don't tell them every detail of my life. It's as if they don't want me to be independent. My mom took it as an insult when I told her I didn't want her to have my key.

 

So I need some guidance people. Thanks

[j.man]

Is your property not your own home? I'm kind of confused here.

 

Have you been making $55k a year while living with your parents? How much do you have saved up? And why is moving out contingent on whether or not you can buy a house? That's an awfully big luxury I don't think anyone should hold as the standard. You can hold onto your savings and rent a place whether or not you decide to go back to school.

[thejigsup]

I don't see the quandary here. I worked 2 jobs while I was getting my Masters, in Psych believe it or not. You can work full time and do your Masters. I did. I was a single mother with my own place, also. If you want to do it badly enough, you will.

[photograph11]

I still live with my parents but bought the place.moving in it in July.

[photograph11]

I've been living with my parents while making 55k for the past year

[Movingforward3]

I agree that you have to think about choices and sacrifices. This is one of those times. Ironic, how my upcoming promotion is my way to get out in the long term, but make sacrifices in the short term. More work, more money and eventually a way to a new career.

 

You have to decide what is more important to you. You don't get a participation trophy at work. If you can find something that you love to do, that's a plus. But, over time you will burn out.

 

So, you have a few the options before you:

1. Suck it up and work for 55 k per year to have your home

2. Do school and work, so you can have both with a sacrifice of time.

3. Move back in with mom and dad to do school.

 

Each of these choices have pro's and con's and sacrifices built in. Only you can choose which one is best for you. And recognize that as things go, these are pretty good choices to have!

[Misskitty16]

If it were me, I would keep the house and the 55K a year job. Find other fulfillment in volunteer work if you like working with the elderly.

[Jith111]

do you have your own home or thinking of buying? If you have your own home I guess you can rent it out to another family (which will pay off the mortgage and give you extra cash hopefully) while you live at your parents when studying