Really struggling... He's selling engagement ring

[Jennyhen]

Sat in his house as I was getting my stuff and noticed my ring on the shelf, didn't think much of it but turns out he's going to sell it, it's hurt me so much yet another wound to the heart, been a bad day in general I got upset in the house so ended up messaging him, said hurtful things to get a reaction from him, he's basically said he wants to move on so can't speak to me anymore and he's selling the ring because he needs to forget about the engagement and me. Iv gone a bit mad and said well I'm taking all the things I bought him if it's like that, his PlayStation and to etc and he said fine which just makes me more annoyed!

Anyway just wanted a rant, iv turned into psycho ex and I really don't want to be this girl, this isn't me! I know I need to move on and let him go but it's just so hard

[DoF]

Don't lie to us or yourself, this IS you. And with your actions you just validated and confirmed to him why he is out the door.

 

Relax and calm down. Yes, you will need to go no contact in order to get over him (read: what he is doing is smart). And the best thing you can do NOW, is LEARN FROM IT ALL. DO NOT repeat the same mistakes in future relationships.

 

Take at least 3-6 months to heal and recover. No contact with Ex or opposite sex during that time.

 

Good luck

[Jennyhen]

Am I being unreasonable to be upset that he is selling my ring? We're talking a month since we split and it was his doing, say he weren't happy, bored etc I never did anything wrong to him, I just feel it's pretty heartless of him I could never do that to someone

But yes I should not of gone off at him for it as it's not going to change anything, I suppose his true colours have shown its just hard after 5 years with someone

[abitbroken]

An Xbox is a gift. It is no longer yours once you give it. it's petty and childish to take it out of retaliation. Ditto a sweater or cologne or a cake.

 

An engagement ring is a symbol of engagement. When the engagement is broken off, the right thing to do is to return the ring, particularly if you had not been engaged very long. It is up to him whether he chooses to let you keep it, he sells it, etc. What do you want, for him to keep it forever?

[Jennyhen]

To be honest after 4 years being engaged I thought I would keep it, I took it off and put it in a drawer when we broke up but I woulda thought it was mine to keep, it means a lot to me and the thought of him selling it with not a care in the world really hurts

I know it sounded pathetic saying I would keep his stuff I bought him, think he knows it's just because I was upset, anyway I asked him to block me which iv been asking him to do for a while and he has so the no contact has begun

[mhowe]

An engagement ring is a promise to wed...if the engagement is broken, the ring is returned. It wasn't yours to keep!

[Jennyhen]

Okay that's sad, I was obviously wrong, that's is for your responses

[Jennyhen]

Thanks for reaponses*

[Ms Darcy]

It's natural to feel a bit bummed out, but it WAS his ring to return. He's not doing anything wrong there.

 

But I think you should remember that this guy was a douche and talking to other women, so in the long run you are better off.

[BeHeard]

Isn't, by law, an engagement ring considered a "gift" and your property to do with what you wish?

 

But if you gave it back, the above is probably null and void.

[mhowe]

Isn't, by law, an engagement ring considered a "gift" and your property to do with what you wish?

 

But if you gave it back, the above is probably null and void.

 

No, it isn't a gift per se. It is a ring given in exchange for a promise to marry. Technically, a verbal contract.

When the contract is voided, the consideration (ring) is returned.

 

Had she answered "no" to the "will you marry me" ---- she wouldn't have gotten the ring as a gift!!!!!