If your ex never contacts you again, does that mean they never loved you?

[frida]

My ex broke up with me three months ago and it came out of nowhere. He cried when he did it and said it was hard, but said it was what he thought was best.

 

We go to college together so NC is kinda hard...but not really. I went to him once to understand why he did it then once after a month to ask for a second try and got no response. We haven't spoken since then (that was 2 months ago) but we have a class together and work in the same building. For the longest time we just wouldn't acknowledge each other. However, about a week and a half ago he reached out to a friend of mine to have lunch. At the end he asked about me and if I hated him (she said no). He then asked if she could ask me if it would be ok for him to contact me...I said it was fine and she told him.

 

Well long story- short, he never contacted me. We've seen each other and he's said hi to me in passing (twice and very awkwardly), but thats it.

 

He's made a lot of new friends and seems to be having the great life, so why would he ask if I hate him? I even think he's talking to someone new.

 

So my question is : If your ex never contacts you again, does that mean they never loved you?

 

Also if you have any insight to my situation I'm all ears!!

[Capricorn3]

So my question is : If your ex never contacts you again, does that mean they never loved you?

No. It means he sees no point in dragging out any hurt or pain and chooses to move on instead. It's a good thing, imo.

[shessofly]

I think that someone can decide that the relationship isn't working for them but still care about you. Most people do not like to hurt someone they once loved/cared about. You may not realize it but he is showing some care for you by leaving you be and allowing you some heal time. Feel better soon.

[frida]

But why would he ask to contact me and never say anything? I know he asked about me and he has to know I know. I just dont understand! I was doing fine until he did this.

[mhowe]

Knowing it was okay to contact you was enough...it means you don't hate him. That's all he wanted to know. Don't expect any contact.

[frida]

Thanks for all the responses. I guess I just thought he was different. He told my friend how he felt uncomfortable around me and wanted to talk and nothing. I had made so much progress, deactivating my facebook and moving forward. But I guess I just have to accept it.

[mhowe]

He felt uncomfortable because he thought you hated him for the break up. He went to lunch, asked about how you felt...and now his guilt is relieved. He has no need to feel bad anymore and can say "hi", but there isn't anything to say about moving on.