Pillow Talk - Prenuptial Agreement

[needhelp6]

What is important is why this has you so concerned. It's not that your reaction is wrong, your reaction is information to perhaps look at. What is behind your reaction? Are there thoughts connected with it? Concerns? Are you picking up something subtle coming from her, or from something else? Sit quietly with it for awhile, and see what comes up about it.

What "had" me so concerned was the casual nature that it was brought-up. I chalk that up to the fact that I'm a tad on the serious/formal side and have a tendency to over think things.

[journeynow]

What "had" me so concerned was the casual nature that it was brought-up. I chalk that up to the fact that I'm a tad on the serious/formal side and have a tendency to over think things.

 

I get that, but what does it mean to you, what is the thought about it, or behind it. I"m asking you to look deeper, and not just simply label it causal and yourself serious. Look deeper to get a better understanding.

[Fudgie]

I think it's a GOOD thing that she was able to casually state her feelings on an issue. Wouldn't you rather that your partner feel comfortable enough with you to do that? Or do you feel that all "serious" issues must only be discussed in serious contexts, with serious faces and undertones?

 

She wasn't proposing or drafting such an agreement, she was simply stating that she isn't opposed to one in the future if things progressed. That's it.

 

You are overthinking this and I think if you were to bring this up to her "I don't like how you brought up the pre nup comment", you're stifling open communication and essentially punishing her for being open and comfortable with her feelings with you. That's a sure fire way to make her feel uncomfortable around you and make her feel like she can't talk about certain things. That is not what you want.

 

You need to lighten up big time. Take a chill pill or have some vodka and BREATHE.

[needhelp6]

I get that, but what does it mean to you, what is the thought about it, or behind it. I"m asking you to look deeper, and not just simply label it causal and yourself serious. Look deeper to get a better understanding.

There's no "thought" about or behind it. I think prenuptial agreements are good for both parties, evidently she does too and if we ever cross that bridge we'll deal with it then. I'm more formal I probably wouldn't have said anything about it until we crossed that bridge, she did and that's OK, it shows a level of comfort in the relationship. To ME it was just odd that she did it in bed. Obviously I'm in the minority thinking that's odd . . . which is good.

 

I think it's a GOOD thing that she was able to casually state her feelings on an issue. Wouldn't you rather that your partner feel comfortable enough with you to do that? Or do you feel that all "serious" issues must only be discussed in serious contexts, with serious faces and undertones?

 

She wasn't proposing or drafting such an agreement, she was simply stating that she isn't opposed to one in the future if things progressed. That's it.

 

You are overthinking this and I think if you were to bring this up to her "I don't like how you brought up the pre nup comment", you're stifling open communication and essentially punishing her for being open and comfortable with her feelings with you. That's a sure fire way to make her feel uncomfortable around you and make her feel like she can't talk about certain things. That is not what you want.

 

You need to lighten up big time. Take a chill pill or have some vodka and BREATHE.

Pill, vodka and breathe, got it LOL. All good points.

[Fudgie]

There's no "thought" about or behind it. I think prenuptial agreements are good for both parties, evidently she does too and if we ever cross that bridge we'll deal with it then. I'm more formal I probably wouldn't have said anything about it until we crossed that bridge, she did and that's OK, it shows a level of comfort in the relationship. To ME it was just odd that she did it in bed. Obviously I'm in the minority thinking that's odd . . . which is good.

 

The problem with not bringing it up until the bridge is crossed is that you run the risk of getting too invested with someone who may have some major incompatibilities with you, you know? It's better to find out in bits and pieces as you go, rather than wait until later.