Am I being strung along?

[Holly Day]

Hi,

I've been seeing a guy. I have told him how I feel & he says he likes me too. We used to talk all the time but I can go for days without hearing from him. I rang him up once & caught him making moves on another girl. He goes out with me & we kiss & get close. I even said to him "if you don't want to see me again I will get lost," he made it clear to me that's not what he wanted & still wanted me around. I have found out that he's off out tonight & I've got a feeling it's someone from a dating site as he has told me he has been on them & I know he's still on them.... He introduces me as a friend & doesn't tell anyone about me..... I'm feeling very confused.

Please help..... Hope this translates ok.

[freewill1234]

He introduces you as a friend, doesn't tell anyone about you and you know he's still on dating sites but yet he still wants you around. How convenient for him. He's stringing you along and you're allowing him too.

 

You're best course of action, stop contacting him. If he's serious about you he will get off the dating sites and focus on you. If not, move on.

[Cherry009]

-you caught him making moves on someone else.

-he told you hes on a dating site.

-he doesn't tell anyone about you.

-he introduces you to people as a friend.

 

Read those points over a few times, are you still confused?? He wants to keep you around as a back up plan, he is seeing other people, he isn't that into you., Move on and find someone who actually wants to be with you and only you.

[SpottiOtti]

I think you better go back and read what you wrote in your post, OP. It's pretty clear to me that this guy isn't that into you. By the way, next time don't say stuff like, "If you don't want to see me just tell me and I'll get lost", because it communicates to people that you don't value yourself very highly. You know what, if someone doesn't want to date you it's their loss, and you tell them to get lost! Or better yet, don't say a word and let your silence communicate that you're walking away from the situation.

[HeartGoesOn]

If you're not exclusive, the both of you are free agents and can date others. However, if he's lying to you about his dating status, I would walk.

[JGintheOC]

GO back and reread what you typed originally.

 

That's clue enough for you.

[SooSad33]

"I've been seeing a guy. I have told him how I feel & he says he likes me too. We used to talk all the time but I can go for days without hearing from him."

- You are seeing a guy. You two are both on a dating site. You are NOT official.

... you two are not exclusive.

 

You're choice.. accept & keep at him OR look at moving on?

[Holly Day]

I'm not on a dating site.

[Holly Day]

Your right, about me not valuing myself much.... I have not long been out of an abusive relationship & he knows this as well.... It's a sad state of affairs when people just move in on you when your vulnerable

[hope4better]

If by "getting close" you mean you guys fool around or have sex, then it sounds like he is using you as a booty call. Some girls are okay with this kind of set-up, but it sounds like you want a committed relationship. If that's what you're looking for, you need to be very clear with him about your expectations for an exclusive relationship.

Be prepared for one of three responses: 1) He'll respect what you're asking for and genuinely commit to you, 2) He'll tell you he respects what you're saying (but not actually mean it) in order to continue receiving booty, or 3) He'll tell you to get lost. Unfortunately the first response will be the least likely result, based on the sound of this guy. But what do you have to lose? It doesn't sound like you're very happy anyway.

Be smart, and don't let him sweet-talk you.