Jump to content

Is it natural to feel like they are the best?


mike7788

Recommended Posts

Also, it's normal to idealize someone at first because you're too close to the situation to see all of the issues in the relationship for what they were (I don't know your situation but I assume there were issues in the relationship that led to the breakup).

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Yes I believe this is natural and happens a lot.

 

I got broken up with less than 3 weeks ago, and soon found out after that she lied to me about several things. Even with that, I still idealize her good points and everything good in our relationship. It is very hard to focus on the negatives, even though she has plenty, and has issues just like everyone else.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Yes... I think we remember the good things and rationalize the longing until we get over it. I have felt that way about every ex and with time I changed my mind on each one. I love my current Ex's personality. We had so much fun together. So now that I've been out playing the field, meeting new guys, I miss his great personality.... But he dumped me for his ex, so personality aside, he's an ass. And that's what I just keep telling myself.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I used to think like that with my first love. He treated me cruelly BUT because I loved him I idealised him so much it took me nearly a year and a half to knock him off my pedestal. HOWEVER I have changed. Right now, I know I might not find somebody just like my latest ex (whom I really love), but I'm sure I'll find somebody who possesses even more positive qualities so I'm not phased.

 

Trust that things will work out. You will always find somebody better in lots of ways-that's what I've found with experience. Every new bf I've had was closer to my ideal. It's all a mindset thing, once you have it right...Anything can happen.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Ever hear the saying, "Better the devil you know than the devil you don't know?"

 

Humans typically fear change. We don't trust it, we don't like it, and we will try to avoid it for something familiar. After a break up, the future is a big, blank canvas...and the unknown can be frightening. Frightening enough that a non-working relationship that you were familiar with can seem like a better alternative.

 

It's not better....it's just "known." (If it was really better, there wouldn't be a break-up.)

 

Give it 6 months or a year. If you're like most folks and let time do what it does, you'll look back and wonder why you wanted to hang on. (Or, if you're me, you'll wonder what you ever saw in that person in the first place.)

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Archived

This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.

×
×
  • Create New...