Frustrated mother

[Happybtconfuse]

I have a son who is turning 4 next month , he's a sweet child but he doesn't listen to me. It's like he doesn't respect my authority, he listens to his dad 100% but with me he's a little rebel. When he's does something he's not suppose to (he knows the basic rules) I put him in time out but once I turn my head he's fooling around. When his dad puts him in time out he just sits there. I am getting so frustrated with him, I feel bad when I get mad at him. I have 2 younger kids and 2 older kids , I try to give them all attention and my little rebel is the only one that seems to act out. I just need some advice....

[ThatwasThen]

Where do you put him on time out? What do you do when he "fools around?"

[Happybtconfuse]

Time out is a little chair in a corner , when he starts fooling around I put him back on the chair and take anything that he was playing with away.

[pl3asehelp]

I've had to do like upwards of 20 timeouts in a row with one of my kids. It's frustrating as hell, but if they get up before the timer goes off, it gets reset and they get a new timeout. Other things I do are take all priviledges away such as toys, tv, playing outside, night lights, etc and they only get things back if they behave. Right now my 4 year olds room is pretty bare because of all the crap he used to have that we had to take back.

[ThatwasThen]

If you talk to him while you're putting him back, I'd stop making any type of conversation with him and just re-sit him and take away what ever it is he's got in his hands. If he talks to you, then ignore him. If he's engaging you in conversation (even the negative kind) then he's getting your attention.

 

I think a timer is a good idea. When he knows the buzzer goes off, off he can go and not before.

 

If you're not talking to him then maybe observe what you do differently from your husband and change it up to be exactly what your husband does to keep him seated.

 

Good luck.

[Snny]

Punishment has to be consistent in order for it to be effective. Otherwise, a child is not going to know you don't mean business.

 

When he's does something he's not suppose to (he knows the basic rules) I put him in time out but once I turn my head he's fooling around. When his dad puts him in time out he just sits there. I am getting so frustrated with him, I feel bad when I get mad at him.

This is part of your problem. You "feel bad" and give a sense of hesitation to him, and he senses it. This shows him that you don't take punishment seriously... so why should he? You can't put ANY emotion into discipline. You need to teach your child to take accountability for his own actions and it has to start EARLY. If you don't nip this in the bud, your son will get worse and he will be a lot harder to discipline.

 

Another question is what is his dad doing differently when he has to punish him?

[harryackerman]

He is too young 4 month only. Give him a break. Don't panic. When he will become mature then he will definitely obey your orders.

[pl3asehelp]

He is too young 4 month only. Give him a break. Don't panic. When he will become mature then he will definitely obey your orders.

 

He's turning 4 next month, he's not 4 months old. Putting a 4 month old in timeout would be completely ineffective as they're just an immobile blob anyway. Anywhere you set them down would be a time out.

[ThatwasThen]

Putting a 4 month old in timeout would be completely ineffective as they're just an immobile blob anyway. Anywhere you set them down would be a time out.

that made me lol...