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Dad's been given two months to a year...


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When I was a child, my dad had kidney failure that resulted from type 1 diabetes. When I was 12, he got a kidney transplant that saved his life. In 2011, he was diagnosed with lymphoma that was caused by 15 years of immunosuppressants--not only did he have to go through chemo, but he had to come off of the meds keeping him from rejecting his kidney. Amazingly, he pulled through and beat the cancer, and for about a year he seemed to be doing well without any transplant meds.


A few weeks ago, his routine labs came back with some concerning numbers. He had two kidney biopsies performed and it's been confirmed that his kidney is now failing. The transplant coordinator he spoke with today told him that it's really bad, and that he has anywhere from a few months to a year left to live.


I'm so lost. My dad is one of my best friends and I'm terrified of life without him. I'm terrified of my mother being alone after he's gone. I'm terrified of how scared and sad and hopeless he must be feeling.


I already know the "advice" here is to enjoy every moment and cherish the time I have left with him--which I will do, even though my mind can't stop thinking about the inevitable. So I'm not really looking for advice more than I'm hoping for support. Prayers, good thoughts, anything. I just need to know I'm not alone. I can't believe how much this hurts and I can't bear the thought of how much more it will hurt.

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Depending on his will to live, he could surprise you all. My dad was once given 6 months, and lived for 8-10 I don't remember anymore the exact duration but he wanted to live and stuck around as long as his body would allow him to. You're dad has been given up to a year, well he can make it years if he has a desire to live and seeks out even alternative medicine to help him in his fight.


Sorry for your horrible news, but keep hoping there are always advancements in technology and if he can pull out longer he could live long enough for a cure.

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The kind words are appreciated, thank you.


Now that I've had a night's sleep, I guess I'm confused as to how someone in my shoes is supposed to function each day. It's one thing to appreciate each moment I have with my dad and to spend as much time with him as possible, but when I'm at home or work or school, I wonder how to function without being utterly depressed. This sucks.

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Remember he's alive right now. Try not to grieve until there is really something to grieve, I know it's hard it's what I had to tell myself to make it through those years my dad struggled between life and death.



For example, he collaspse about 3 times, and was recessitated once in the years prior to his actual death. We really worried a lot, but he was alive and that's what we had to be grateful for.

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