iceesnowbubble Posted October 28, 2004 Share Posted October 28, 2004 Hey guys! I haven't written on this forum in a while mostly just because I really don't care about getting back with my ex, and even though I read all your guys' posts I usually just leave it to the people who know what they are talking about . Today however, I just wanna shed a little light on some of the people who are curious about No Contact and all that stuff and doubt the power of the dreaded "NC." Although NC seems so hard and it will just make it easier for them to forget you, it really works for most. Not all, I am not saying that by any means...but I have a story where it did work. This story isnt about me,however, but about my best friend Andrew... Here it goes... Two weeks before him and his girlfriends anniversary, this girl broke up with Amdrew and totally shattered his heart. He cried, begged her, totally put his heart out there and let her known how broken up he was. She treated him like crap, said she didnt care, showed no sympathy, and just walked right out of his life to go get some "alone" time and date other guys. At first he tried to contact her, did the whole beggin pleading thing, and she just went farther away. But then.. he did what almost everyone on here tells each other to do. NC. He did it on his own, just stopped communication with her. COMPLETELY. All of a sudden out of nowhere, she starts contacting him recently. A LOT. Over the stupidest things. They were in this period of no contact for probably a month, and they have only been broken up for 1.5 months. Now, she wants him back. Calls him crying saying how much she misses him and wants to get back together. Texts him all day. Calls him.. just like he wished she did but didn't when they first broke up. So I guess what I'm trying to say is that NC does work, and its crazy how it happens. As soon as he forgot about her and doesn't really care if she calls or not, she wants him back and "can't live without him" and realizes what she lost. Beside the point.. this is kind of a crazy twist, but he DOESNT want her back. She's back, but he wants nothing to do with her.. because he is seriously interested in someone new. ME. It's crazy guys..but let me know what you all think! -Iceesnowbubble Link to comment
hockeyboy Posted October 28, 2004 Share Posted October 28, 2004 good for him! ive been in his shoes before and its such a great feeling. NC really does work. my current ex is fading rapidly in my memory, its great. you know when you break up your supposed to put everything of you and the other persons in a box and put it in the corner. well, NC does that mentality. when you do NC its like you put all your memories in a lil box in your head and shove em in the back of your brain. they are there, but you dont have to look at em all the time. NC does this naturally. Link to comment
iceesnowbubble Posted October 28, 2004 Author Share Posted October 28, 2004 love the analogy about putting the memories in a box in the back of your mind..thats a good one.. yeah, its interesting though. He was all broken up about losing her. Now she is back and won't leave him alone, and it's pissing him off because he wants me but.. i don't want him. relationships are overrated. -iceesnowbubble Link to comment
dontknowwhattodo Posted October 28, 2004 Share Posted October 28, 2004 Yeah, NC works most of the time. My ex is not yet crying or begging to come back but he starts to contact me with stupid reason such as his dog misses me and I should go over to his place to hang out with the dog some time. I certainly miss the dog but hanging out with his dog means hanging out with him too because that cute little dog cannot open his apartment's door for me herself. Should I go? Link to comment
red12 Posted October 29, 2004 Share Posted October 29, 2004 You know I thought NC wouldnt work for me it does alot of wonders the first weeks hard but it gets better. The last girl I dated for while ran off with some1 else well I did NC. Then about 10 days later she calls me back wondering why we havents talked. I was like what do we have to talk about she ran off with a nother guy what do I care. She asked if we could be friends and every thing. And also she said if I need to talk or something to call her. I would think she would want to get back together maybe. Cause the guy shes going with cheated on her already and is hearing rumors about him. But im in dismay right now in thinking of getting back together with her. So I dont know. But yes NC does work maybe not on every1 but it did me. And now the girl I first dated this summer wants to get back together for some reason. I gess she finally sees what she really lost or could of had. Link to comment
cmacey Posted October 29, 2004 Share Posted October 29, 2004 My ex contacted me today, but i Think it's just cause she wants to stay friends. I did NC for only a week and then she imed me today and wanted to call. I'll be honest, I still do want her back, but the last couple of months have really helped me realize that I don't need her back. I'm just going to be greedy with my life when I talk to her and let her wonder what I'm doing. I'll listen to her and let her know how great I'm doing, but now that she's lonely and needs a friend I'm not gonna let her get that from me, I'll listen to her and hang up when I've finished hearing how miserably bored she is. Eventually, she'll want me back and realize the huge mistake she made. But, I probably won't be there for her anymore. So yeah in summary, NC is the way to go, both to feel better, and to get them back (as a relationship maybe), or to get them back (if you're the vengeful type and have gotten over them by the time they wake up and smell the coffee). Just my thoughts. Do the NC for yourself, and it just might wake them up. Link to comment
ryan14 Posted October 29, 2004 Share Posted October 29, 2004 hello all i think from all your examples here IMHO are all first break ups, watta about couples that broke up the 2nd time around, let say 1.5 years of being together or maybe ranging from 5 to 10 years relationship, does NC work for those kinds of situation in getting the ex back. can someone shed some light here Link to comment
iceesnowbubble Posted October 30, 2004 Author Share Posted October 30, 2004 my ex and i broke up 4 or 5 times.. and NC worked each time. He came back all five of those times, mostly because he had heard how good i was doing on my own and couldnt stand that he wasnt right by my side. NC works. Link to comment
ryan14 Posted October 30, 2004 Share Posted October 30, 2004 hi iceesnowbubble for each break how long did it take? please exclude the current break up, i'm really sorry for being sodemanding here, i just wish there is stil hope for me Link to comment
iceesnowbubble Posted October 30, 2004 Author Share Posted October 30, 2004 hey dont worry about it, i totally know how you feel! for each break up the times varied. At one point it was only a week. The next was somewhere in the one month range..and the longest was three months of not talking at all except casual fighting once a week..haha. This time we have been apart for a little over four months, and although i don't care whether or not my ex comes back sometimes I sense a little bit that there is a little bit of feeling still left in him. He has always had a problem of knowing what he wants.. and when he came back to me its like nothing ever happened. So hang in there... there is always hope as long as you two are both alive..how long have you guys been apart... (sorry, i havent been on here in a while following everyone stories..so im a little out of the loop...) -iceesnowbubble Link to comment
ryan14 Posted October 30, 2004 Share Posted October 30, 2004 hi again well my 1st break up with her is about 3 months, we sort of got back together (unofficially) after one year we got small fights (i believe its workable) but she got cold to me again, i ask her why she's doing these things and she told me she's tired, i ask her so where do our relationship stand, she said there was no relationship in the first place, i got really pissed off but remain calm, i ask her if she still loves me, she said she doesn't know, so i said i would only take YES or NO as an answer, she got angry and remain with her statement that she doesn't know, i told her calmly that i loved her very much i said good bye and we hang up, that was way back june 12, 2004 the same day she broke up with me the first time. its been 5 months now and we still talk 1-2 times a week sometimes she calls/text me and sometimes i do the same, right now i'm really going to be serious about this NC thing (i am so depressed because i'm gonna mis her like crazy) if you wanna know my updates check this link link removed thank you very much for replying iceesnowbubble Link to comment
iceesnowbubble Posted October 30, 2004 Author Share Posted October 30, 2004 NC seems like the only way to make her realize what she lost... i recommend it strongly. -iceesnowbubble Link to comment
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