to stay or to let go?

[ChellyV]

i am in a relatively new relationship, 4 months, exclusively dating, and i believe no strong emotional attachment yet.

i am at a period where i am trying to decide whether to go on with it or not.

he seems passive, uninvolved, doesn't speak too much, never plans dates or weekends, and most of all, doesnt even have long term goals in his own life. it is quite hard. i am getting exhausted.

suggestions on how to handle?

[charity]

let go!

why would you stay?

in 4 months of exclusivity there should be a strong emotional bond. relationships are something that should be enjoyed, not endured.

[siegfri333]

he seems passive, uninvolved, doesn't speak too much, never plans dates or weekends

Ok you're bored, and you don't love him. Why are you with him?

 

 

, and most of all, doesnt even have long term goals in his own life

This is unfair, you're 42, i assume he is around your age, what kind of "long-term goals" should he have ? You're not 20 something anymore...

[Minx2012]

let go!

why would you stay?

 

It's probably because she is 42 years old and being single at that age is a lot harder than if you were single in your mid 20s or even early 30s. With that being said, hopefully, the OP realises that it's better to pursue happiness actively than stay in a limbo of a relationship, passively. You let life go by having a lacklustre relationship when you should be swept off your feet, having the time of your life.

[ChellyV]

i meant, long term goals for himself - i mean something pertaining to himself in terms of career, and personal growth. he never speaks about it nor answers my query when i do. maybe he refuse to share it? but nonetheless, yes minx is right, life is too short. that 4 months could have been enough to get to know someone and measure is he or is he not going to be?

[mhowe]

The beginning of a relationship, say the 1st 4 months, is supposed to be the fun, yahooo, can't wait to see you time.

 

He is what he is -- and he doesn't sound like relationship material.

[bw92116]

What's in this for you?

[Ms Darcy]

You sound done. Perhaps it's time to end it.

[MizzGee]

I also think it's time to move on. If you're already exhausted at 4 months, why waste more of your time? From what you said it doesn't sound like he's that interested either..

[RGS]

Agreed, sounds like its best to leave this one. At least it sounds like it'll be relatively easy to move on from.