I LOST MY DIGNITY AGAIN AFTER 3 MONTHS OF NC. Im so stupid.

[julian19]

I lost all my dignity and self respect when i begged my ex to take me back during the time we broke up. It was too much. I went NC for 3 months because I could not take it anymore that she is looking at me like a poor, low, worthless man.

Now last week, i decided to reactivate my facebook account after 3 months of closing it and BAM!! she sent me a message the next day. We did catch up until we ended up flirting. she admitted that she missed me so much and that shes been waiting for me to open my facebook again and shes been thinking about me crazily.

 

But the problem was, she hasnt changed. SHE IS STILL INTO MIND GAMES and im tired of it. She always makes me jealous, and stuff, to make my emotions resurface and yes, she made it! i went emotional again and she saw all my feelings for her again. now i know she looks at me like a pathetic and worthless guy thata i used to be. I already gave her a good and attractive impression when i returned to facebook, but now, i lost it. Im so stupid. Im so weak. why?? I dont have control of my emotions when it comes to her. i hate myself. I lost the chance of gaining her respect back to me.

[rickyspanish]

well atleast this could be the event that breaks off hope of reconciliation and finally lets you move on. you did all you could and shes not budging. now you know to forget about her and move onto the next relationship. get some friends and start goin out for some fun.

[ClarityCoast]

She is into mind games and making you suffer?

 

What makes her so loveable?

 

She may not respect you at all. Often people who have little respect for themselves...show little respect to others.

 

So what is your strongest move? Have the ultimate respect for yourself...stop playing her games. You can't play a game if there is only one player.

It sounds like she is expecting you to react this way..and she enjoys it. Surely its an ego boost to her.

What would happen if you stopped playing? Could you show enough respect for yourself to disengage her?

 

Can you thing of a single healthy, stress-free reason to continue falling back into her trap by communicating?

[tortie]

You did good, I've done much worse.

We met, then he disappeared. I sent several messages with no response and finally stopped and felt like crap and ashamed. After 3 months of silence later he wrote "Would like to see you again" but when I replied he didnt respond. Then I kept sending messages few more times asking why he writes something and doesnt respond. Finally he responded: "Why so serious. All I said I wanted to see you".

Later the same thing happened again. After 3 month of NC I couldnt resist and sent him angry msg. He responded with anger at first but then somehow our conversation moved on to how much we wanted each other. He was far away at that time and said will call when he is back. He disappeared in the middle of conversation, and I sent about few more msgs with no response.

He is into mind games. He acted with more interest when I was mean to him and didnt respond. But when I wrote nice messages he ignored me and treated like dirt. Now I dont have a chance to ignore him because he is not contacting me at all.

I totally lost my dignity, self respect, and probably his respect for me, if he had any at all.

At least she was the one who wrote to you after 3 months, not you.

Dont know if this helps you at all. You did the best you could, be compassionate to yourself.

[Tom1990]

Ach, I feel you, mate. I left a message to my ex's second FB account, never thinking she'd get it. It was simple, asking her to forgive me. Well, she found it and she...didn't exactly flip out, but she blocked every line of electronic communication. I felt like an idiot yesterday. Today, I'm starting to feel stronger, because that was finally my rock-bottom.

 

Let yourself feel awful. It's normal. Vent, whine, cry all you need to. We lose control of ourselves at moments like this. Be grateful that it couldn't get much worse. Then when you're ready, pick yourself up and start moving forward some more.