For MOST girls its a lot easier for them to get a relationsh

[Shinobie]

Im just saying for most girls it does seem like its a lot easier for them to get a relationship then guys because us guys usually always have to instigate.Girls get conversations sprung at them constantly from guys except for some.Although there are some girls that get no attention from guys at all and i dont get it like this girl i like who i think is very cute no guys go for her but i would but im too shy which is the thing im trying to break and go up to her.If i wasnt still so nervous to go up to girls o man id be talking to her right away at school but i need to think of great conversation.Although back to the point it does seem pretty much a lot easier for them to get a relationship.I mean some non attractive girls have a hard time cause guys dont go up to them.I feel like an unattractive guy but i still have to go up to them and make the first move.Cause i hate this whole guys make the first move crap it bothers mei mean i wouldnt mind a girl making the first move.

[ComputerGuy]

Dude....best thing to do is just go up to her, say hi, hows it going? ask how her days been, then ask "So, anything exciting happen today?" if she says says yeah, you got your got your conversation started, is she says no, just say, "So just an average normal day then???" and when she says yeah just go "Cool.....normals a good thing right???

 

I mean I could go onj forever, but that there is EXACTLY what I have been doing of late, and it's been quite good in getting a conversation going.

[MrDraw]

Your right you know.

It would be a lot easier for us shy-guys if the girls would make the first move some times. But it doesn't work that way.

 

There is one big reason for this

It's much easier for a girl to wait for a guy to approach her and make some small conversation or whatever. Then the guy is the one taking the biggest risk and is he the vulnerable one. And in this way she can do with him as she likes.

 

The other way around, when she has to aproach a guy, she's vulnerable and can get turned down. No girl wants that. Most girls don't like to take that risk, they just want to keep everything in their control.

 

So if she waits for a guy to approach her, she only has to make the decision to turn him down or let him get close in some way. This is the easiest part to do. Absolutely no risk in that!!!

 

Think about it!!

Sounds pretty good hé??!!

 

It took my some time to figure this out, but I learned to use this fact.

Just approach a girl if you feel ike it. She's just as nervous as you are (well, if you've made some sort of flirtasious contact with each other offcourse).

If you play it right, try to be confident and just be yourself and especially don't ry to hit on her right away, she can't really turn you down.

Act as she is a friend of yours, keep it simple at first.

 

If she turns you down, (immidiately or eventually), keep on smiling and walk slowly away, saying that you've liked talking to her.

Don't go rushing of to your friends. just take it slowly.

If you want you can talk about it with your friend, but do that in a quit way, so she doesn't get suspicious.

Whatever you do, don't go around looking at her the rest of the evening and make funny-or awkward faces.

 

And don't go hitting on another girl, let it be for this moment. If you do that, she will immidiately think the worst of you approaching her before, as she was just a girl. Think "Next time better".

 

Keep in touch with the girl by looking at her from time to time. To make the appearance of you "not being offended". Just go on and enjoy the rest of the evening.

 

OK, I know it sounds easie, but it isn't. Took me a lot of time to do this.

And to be really hounest, most of the times I still feel like I'm hit by a train. And most of the times I will do nothing at all, just to be on the save side.

 

Life is difficult enough, try to make the best of it.

 

Greetz,

MrDraw

[Spirits Away]

Next time you have a class with her, don't think at all and just go up to her and maybe ask her for a pen or something. Then just smile and say thanks. When you've done that, put up another post and we'll help you on your next step

 

If you really want a theory to back yourself up, you might want to use the theory of intention. If i'm correct, this is what i'm hearing from you: She gets no attention, poor girl I want to give her the attention she deserves. Why not act on it since it's a good thing that you're doing for her.

[Shinobie]

Ya like i said i dont know why no guys would like her cause too me she is very cute but i guess a lot of guys r just shallow.

[CarterJonas]

Why don't you just go up to her and talk to her as a friend. Start off with saying something about school, class etc. You haven't got to be the best conversationist, just be yourself and keep the conversation light.

 

I used to be a little shy when I was younger, but once you do it a few times it gets a lot easier. Just be yourself, keep it happy and be nice and you will go a long way! The first time is always the hardest.

 

best of luck

[ECD]

I am amazed. This is the same guy that said that nice guy is the way to go.

 

I have no advice for you, other than stop acting like a ***** and start being a man.

[Shinobie]

Sorry ecd but im not into the old fashioned the man is in control nonsense i believe in 50/50.Being nice is a GREAT thing to do it makes other peoples lives better and it makes me feel good iono i just feel great when i help people.Iono maybe ur just more into a selfish personality because i dont believe in that whole be a man im gonna get a girl and be in control stuff i dont like it way i view "manly" guys is the ones that like to think with their small head instead of their big head and have no sense for true love.I be nice to everybody and thats just me because it is truly great to be a nice person im sorry u r more involved in selfish acts as i would hate to be.

[Shinobie]

O yah and one more thing ECD thank u for ur great post "THE MAN!" sarcasm is great it makes things so much better

[ECD]

I am sorry, there is no hope for you my friend.

[Shinobie]

Nice job if i havent noticed is the fact that your post is rude too me so it might be a lil warning for u cause it was disrespectful also the fact that im on my last warning hopes for one for u.I know theres hope for me man u cannot look at us nice guys like we always get walked over.I know when something is wrong and thats when i strike and get down on the person who is trying to use me.I feel like some girls r actually interested in me mang how is ther no hope.This one girl that was tyring to apply to be a waitress stayed there waiting for her friend who is a waitress to get off.She kept on looking at me all the time when i was working and sometimes smiling to maybe want to talk but iono im stupid and ignorant what do i know

[Shinobie]

The greates things about ur comments is the fact that they do not bother me in any way and that makes me happy.I Just laugh at your comments cause i know you are wrong and u have some mean things to say to people and that is kind of bad but o well hopefully people dont take ur stuff seiously.

[ComputerGuy]

I agree with Shinobie....this is a place for help, not abuse. Either post a reason or dont post it.

 

Anyway, Shinobie, I'm glad you are having a positive outlook and its nice to know I'm not the decent guy left on the planet.

[S1asher6]

I wouldn't say it's a lot easier for girls to get into a relationship. I think girls have just as hard a time getting into a relationship as guys do. I mean, a relationship is a two way street, right? If a guy likes a girl, the guy makes the first move. If a girl likes a guy, the girl makes the first move. If guys are being served on the plate for making the first move, the same goes for the ladies. It's really a matter of who likes who; whether the girl likes the guy or the guy likes the girl.

There are the girls that makes the first moves and strictly from experience, it seems like they have a pretty tough time bringing up that courage. It's not any easier for the ladies. It might even be tougher for the ladies because, as it seems, it's a guy's job to make the approach.

Then there are the girls who would just sit there and peek at you. They wouldn't approach you and they probably never will unless you make the initiative. That's when it becomes tough on the guy's part.

But reading around on these forums, it doesn't seem like a guy's job to make the first move anymore. When it comes down to, it really depends on who you are; whether you're the go-getter or the come-and-get-me type. If you're the come-and-get-me type, then it's tough whether you're a guy or a girl. Also, it really depends on who likes who first.

[broadshoulders]

well that ECD guy is just a little helpless and hurt person and the only way he can feel good about himself is to kick someone when he is on the ground. he should pick a figth with the big and standing guys, all i have to say.

[Alabama]

ECD actually made a good post. Basically he's just tired of people griping about their lives, and thinks they should do something about it. Well he's right. Anyway, I do believe it is easier for a girl to get a date, due to tradition as the man asks the girl out, but I've seen it more and more that their are girls asking guys out too. Anyway, that's just my two cents.

[ECD]

well that ECD guy is just a little helpless and hurt person and the only way he can feel good about himself is to kick someone when he is on the ground. he should pick a figth with the big and standing guys, all i have to say.

 

Right on brother!

[Scout]

Guys, no more insults. This thread is on the verge of getting locked, and if anyone else adds to the little spat that just happened, it's going to be.

 

Thanks, Scout

[Sciurus]

I find it is generally easier to actually just start a conversation with a girl in school than people play it out to be. The hard part is actually asking them out. See when just talking to somebody about some random thing you don't really have to worry about being harshly rejected as with the case of actually popping the question, "Would you like to go out with me some time?", etc. Being a shallow, yet hapless romantic much like yourself, I find that I am drawn to very attractive girls that are way out of my league. The best thing to start talking to your friend so that maybe she knows who you are and you can get to know her better. Also it would help not to be a moron and say something stupid, like o my how women drivers suck lol. Anyway i would try to just to talk to her, as thats easy, and not worrying about asking her out til you get to know her better and find the best means to go about doing so. Then when you know her better, use something she likes to get her to go out with you lol. I knew a girl once who loved a certain band. Got tickets for when they were comin to town. Got her to go with me just because of that when she normally wouldnt have. She ended up getting to know me better and really liking me and we went out for almost a year and a half. lol. Anyway, move in small steps then worst comes to worst do what I did lol...