Is there any hope for me and this shy guy, if so, what do I do now?

[lindyl]

This guy is really shy, I liked him for years and thought he liked me but he never asked me out, anyway I asked him to do me a favour so we swapped numbers then, we'd text a bit too, me doing most of the initiating, but he always replied, anyway he'd been coming to my place and we'd been hanging out a bit too, then in June sometime he text me to tell me he'd got a date for a thing he was doing and I told him he'd need to tell me all about it sometime, then I heard nothing till about Oct when he text to ask how I was, I told him I was fine asked how he was and left it at that.

At new year I text him a happy new year but got no reply, then we had this convo a couple weeks ago

 

Me - hey, how you doin?

Him - Hi, doin ok ta, hows u? Long time no hear, Did you text me happy new year on another no?

Me - Am good thanks, did text you at new year but got no reply, I still have same no

Him - Def didn't get it then, would have replied 2u! Happy belated new year to ya anyway!

Me - Cheers, you too (again)

 

Not much in it, but do you think he meant he would have replied to anyone that sent a text or did he mean he'd have replied to me in particular and he was pleased to hear from me?

 

You think he might still be interested or is he just being friendly? This guy has been confusing me since I first met him, he is however a super nice guy, a bit of a loner too, also pretty inexperienced with females too!

 

So what should I do now? Was I too casual in my response to his June thing, I think I should have said something like 'I'm looking forward to hearing about it on the weekend'.

[offplanet]

It's not possible to know from that, whether he's interested or not. In any case, he's not interested in doing anything about it. You weren't too casual, he's the one who's too casual. I don't quite understand what you said about him having a 'date' in June. Did you mean a date with a girl? Anyway, you were always the one doing the inititating, and its been going on a while with no action from his side. It's a waste of time holding out hope of anything with him. You'd have to do all the work. You wouldn't feel special. He'd always disappoint you, because he wouldn't show you that he cared, if he did. I couldn't be bothered with someone like that. He might be a nice guy, and it's not his fault, but he's not actually demonstated any noticeable romantic interest in you. I hope you don't waste any more time or emotion on him.

[happpybear]

ya if there is something there on his part then why is it taking this long? Think about what the obstacle could be...(like did he just get out of a relationship, do you work together, is there too much stuff going on in his life, etc). If you can't think of what the obstacle may be, then i reckon he just isn't into you. It shouldn't take this long. Also it seems like you guys have little to no contact...not a good sign

[SometimesShy]

You have to remember that with shy men, you will have to do almost all of the work to get the relationship started, as most shy men do not approach or pursue women, and will ignore anyone who is not being direct with them.

 

In other words, you cannot be subtle in any way, as he will think he is imagining your interest if you do this. Shy men will ignore most common flirting "signals", so you have to be very direct and spell it out for them in a very obvious way.

[LeftBehind]

You have to remember that with shy men, you will have to do almost all of the work to get the relationship started, as most shy men do not approach or pursue women, and will ignore anyone who is not being direct with them.

 

In other words, you cannot be subtle in any way, as he will think he is imagining your interest if you do this. Shy men will ignore most common flirting "signals", so you have to be very direct and spell it out for them in a very obvious way.

 

Quoted for truth.