Says He Cares For Me Alot, But...

[GymSweetie]

Last night, my BF of 9 months (friend of 4 years) called the 2 times we were intimate mistakes & said we should put it in the past b/c it was unprofessional on his part (he is my daughters gym coach & he has a no dating the moms policy-he broke with me-twice).

 

He then said he cares for me alot and doesn't want to lose me as a friend. He also said he wants to be there for me and wants us to keep the lines of communication open, & be my shoulder to cry on or give a hug if I need one. Told me I could call or talk to him in person anytime. (I am going thru some really hard times right now) He also thanked me for all I have done for him and said I have been so good to him that he will do anything he can to help me get thru.

 

I love him & I think he is scared b/c he is starting to feel something more than just casual.

 

Is No Contact in order or should I just go back to being Best Friend? Please advise.

[AwsomeDude]

be around, give it time, and dont accept any deals !

just tell him that he needs time and its ok with u

[Cadence308]

I'm not sure how long you have been divorced from your husband or if he passed away or what your current situation is, but this gym coach guy may feel like you are on the rebound, depending on what your story is. So maybe he's scared of getting too close for fear of that.

 

Also, if he has such a problem with the fact that he's your daughter's gym coach can you transfer your daughter to another gym class or another school so you can have your cake and eat it too??

 

It sounds like the no contact rule is not in order. He's telling you that he will be there for you, but it sounds like he doesn't just want to be shack up buddies. I think it really sounds like he cares for you. I think that you should give it time and esp. since you said that you are going through some tough times right now. He may feel like right now is not the best time to begin a new relationship with you.

[Cadence308]

I'm not sure how long you have been divorced from your husband or if he passed away or what your current situation is, but this gym coach guy may feel like you are on the rebound, depending on what your story is. So maybe he's scared of getting too close for fear of that.

 

Also, if he has such a problem with the fact that he's your daughter's gym coach can you transfer your daughter to another gym class or another school so you can have your cake and eat it too??

 

It sounds like the no contact rule is not in order. He's telling you that he will be there for you, but it sounds like he doesn't just want to be shack up buddies. I think it really sounds like he cares for you. I think that you should give it time and esp. since you said that you are going through some tough times right now. He may feel like right now is not the best time to begin a new relationship with you.

[unhappyinlove1]

I'll just add one thing - before you completely reorder your child's life to remove the work conflict, you should talk to him. Sorry for this opinion - but many men avoid confrontation at all costs and look for reasons to hide behind. He's been your boyfriend for 9 months? - so why does he care suddenly that he's your daughter's gym coach. I'm just suggesting you actually talk to him and assess whether or not that is the only thing going on here - there's probably more to the story.