An Estimate of the Situation

[Palt]

We were each others' first loves. We dated for about a year before breaking up. After three months, we got back together again. A few months later, we broke up once more.

 

A couple weeks later, she had a new boyfriend. Two months after they started dating, we started talking again...to the point that we were cheating on him. She broke up with him, but then we had a fight and she picked him up again.

 

We haven't communicated since then except for an argument about a month ago. I don't want to talk to her anymore while she is with this other guy, it's far too aggravating.

 

I've been on several first dates in the meantime, but I'm never interested in a second one. Each girl is lovely in their own way, but my heart is stuck with my first love. I don't think I can get it back very easily because I know she loves me very much.

 

She explained to me once that it was important for her to fall in love a few times before settling down. I understand that, but it frustrates me because I was ready to settle down with her and I never felt the need to "look around."

 

I still love her and I do miss her, even though I am angry and cannot trust her right now.

 

I see these other girls because it helps to feel wanted every so often, but I don't think it would feel right to start a relationship with any of them while I still love the first. How would I hide that from a new love?

 

I don't know how she does it, really. Her boyfriend can't possibly know everything she feels for me, or how much we were talking behind his back. And yet, she paints the picture of a perfect relationship to everyone else.

 

It's hard not to be jealous of that.

 

Anyway, we don't communicate now, but I know she thinks of me and misses me. The only reason we don't talk is that we don't want to cheat again. That type of distance is a little too ambiguous to ignore.

 

I'll open it up to all of you now. What do you think I should do?

[Palt]

I don't want to seem needy, but could someone help please?

[chitown9]

You need to go no contact and move on....chi