If you were where i am.........

[Prevail]

Gonna try to keep this short n simple.

Ex is coming back thursday the 26th. weve been talking every few days. she asked me a few weeks ago to go on a small trip with her the 29th. stay overnight at the lake and bring my little brother hes 12, "im 24 shes 22 BTW".

Weve seen each other a few times in the past 2.5 months, got along great both times, both of us miss each other, she is worried about things ending up the way they did with us last time after our 4.5yr relationship. I dont even want her back if shes "been" with anyone else in this time weve been apart "we broke up pretty much saying lets take some time apart and see what happens". I want her to want me back the way i want her. I dont want her to know how much i miss her. and again, if she has slept with anyone else i dont want her back. we agreed that this wasnt about that type of thing and i have been true to that. but i havent asked if she has done anything like tht and dont know how to or if i should. but i dont want to waste my time to find out she has, i could never let it go and i know that..... so... any tips? even if just on part of it. just want this all to go as smoothly as possible.

TY

[goddess23]

well im not sure what you're inquiring about. i mean do you want to know if you should go on this trip? or do you want to know about how to deal with the trip when you go? about going on the trip, if you guys are friends and all, theres no harm, and with her little brother meaning its not like a couples trip. so thats fine. about the trip itself and about dealing with the whole situation, well....i realize you dont want to look like you want her back, but if its been awhile (you didnt specify how long you guys broke up), then you should talk to her about the two of you on this trip. i think this trip is a sign that she wants to pick up the relationship again, or maybe she just wants answers on the two of you. but you should talk to her so you know exactly whats going on. it wouldnt be so far fetched to ask her "soo, what have you been doing for the past __ months??!" and just act interested. not like a jealous bf waiting for answers but as two friends that just wanna have a cute fun yet deep talk. honestly at least this way you can know where you stand and stop just waiting around and let yourself decide "ok, we'll just be friends". either way, if you guys do end up talking and some real clarity or closure is gained then you should reveal your true feelings about missing her, and letting her know that you needed to know what was happening and where you stand so you can make a decision for yourself. it seems you guys had a talk about sleeping with other people as something that hsouldnt happen. but honestly a break is a break. it means you need to explore other possibilities and unless you both were very clear about this little rule, you shouldnt use sex as the measurement. i mean maybe she has had a deep connection with someone but hasnt slept with them. i mean sex is not necessarily the measure to use here. ofcourse its different and you might want to make sure shes tested for stds if you guys do decide to get back together. but thats a different thing. but i think this trip is a good idea, and a good oppertunity to get yourself some answers.