Can Anyone Tell Me What My Ex Wants Now?!

[Snowy]

So me and my ex broke up in March because she lost attraction towards me and the relationship was in a rut. (technically it was mutual, but really, she dumped me lol) At that time, there was another guy who was DESPERATE to be with her.

 

Things were kinda awkward after the break up because we were suppose to still be friends. We don't contact each other anymore but I HAVE to see her every Saturday and Sunday as we both attend the same class on those two days.

 

2 weeks after the break up, her facebook status goes to "in a relationship" and I was confused because she told me before our break up that she doesn't like the other guy AT ALL and will never be with him.

 

So then I thought maybe the status thing was a joke....(I then blocked her facebook to save myself from the torture of checking her profile updates. It's still blocked btw.)

 

BUT NO! 1 month after that, I bump into them walking on the street, his arm around her and he even kissed her cheek while walking. (Literally walked past shoulder to shoulder lol. When she saw me, her face was pretty funny lol...like...oh CRAP haha)

 

I didn't say anything. Just pretended I didn't see anything.

 

Anyway...as time goes by, our "friendship" actually is starting to be more like "friendship". When we see each other on the weekends, our conversation aren't that awkward anymore.

 

Fast forward to now.

 

She now acts really close towards me...making jokes (even sexual jokes referring to some experiences we had when we were together..)...when we walk on the street, she walks really close to me, basically like how a couple would walk on the street minus the hand holding. Last week, she even hinted the idea that she regrets the break up? The topic eventually leads to me bringing up about her current boyfriend. AND GUESS WHAT? SHE DENIES SHE HAS A BOYFRIEND.

 

So I was like wth? I asked, "who was it who you walked with on the street that day?" AND SHE TOLD ME THAT WAS HER UNCLE.

 

What is with this MASSIVE bs?

 

All my instincts tell me shes attracted to me again but my mind is telling me that she is just trying to get an ego boost out of me (maybe her rebound relationship with the other guy isn't going so well?)

 

Anyway, thanks for reading all that

 

WHAT DO I DO?

 

I'm kinda enjoying this attention from her because I still that little bit attracted to her, BUT I'm absolutely determined not to be with this woman again.

 

PS. right now we never talk to each other except when we go to class together on weekends.

[MaxPayne19]

Stick to your gut feeling on this (about being absolutely determined not to be with her again). She is probably going thru a rough patch with this rebound guy or might have broke things off with him. She obviously fed you a deliberate lie when you questioned her about who she was walking with. You can find somebody better than that; somebody that doesn't lie and plays head games.

[GrowingIn]

I was confused because she told me before our break up that she doesn't like the other guy AT ALL and will never be with him.

 

If I had a dollar for every time I have heard that line. You will learn. Not only is it a lie to you, but sometimes a lie to themselves. You should never be with this woman if you can't ever get her to admit....well like you said...."the masssive bs". You never put your foot down in the relationship. You let her fool you under your own nose, and so she believes she can continue to fool you as friends. Just another example that confirms my belief on why man and women simply can't be friends when attraction is involved....whether in a relationship or even as an ex.

[HeartGoesOn]

I would refuse to be an audience to this nonsense.

 

I'll never understand why someone would want to be friends with a person that has lied and cheated on them. Are you sure this is about getting back together with her, or is it the point of winning the race? There can be a very fine line between the two, and it can be very easy to fool yourself in the long run.

[pietro5266]

She's playing head-games with you to boost her own ego. Maybe she is having a rough patch with new guy, but, if she's willing to flirt with you while dating new guy, and given her other lies, sounds like she's not honest with anyone.

 

You're right not to want to date her anymore -- she's not worth the emotional stress.

[LP90]

DONT let her back in your life. Thats a typical liar/cheater. I heard all the same BS lies for months and believed them out of stupidity. In the end everything i felt in my gut was right, unfortunately for me, i was strung along for many months and went through a lot of pain before it finally ended. If you know you dont want to be with her, then dont even try.

[Snowy]

I would refuse to be an audience to this nonsense.

 

I'll never understand why someone would want to be friends with a person that has lied and cheated on them. Are you sure this is about getting back together with her, or is it the point of winning the race? There can be a very fine line between the two, and it can be very easy to fool yourself in the long run.

 

She did lie but I have no evidence that she cheated. Although it can be assumed that she certainly did flirt with the other guy while still in the relationship...

 

I am showing absolutely no interest beyond being normal friends at the moment.

 

She is actually one of the smartest and kindest friend I've met, but when it comes to relationships, she is a just lost cause.

 

I just don't know what she's up to now.

[Snowy]

She's playing head-games with you to boost her own ego. Maybe she is having a rough patch with new guy, but, if she's willing to flirt with you while dating new guy, and given her other lies, sounds like she's not honest with anyone.

 

You're right not to want to date her anymore -- she's not worth the emotional stress.

 

That is exactly what I'm thinking.

[Snowy]

Stick to your gut feeling on this (about being absolutely determined not to be with her again). She is probably going thru a rough patch with this rebound guy or might have broke things off with him. She obviously fed you a deliberate lie when you questioned her about who she was walking with. You can find somebody better than that; somebody that doesn't lie and plays head games.

 

If I had a dollar for every time I have heard that line. You will learn. Not only is it a lie to you, but sometimes a lie to themselves. You should never be with this woman if you can't ever get her to admit....well like you said...."the masssive bs". You never put your foot down in the relationship. You let her fool you under your own nose, and so she believes she can continue to fool you as friends. Just another example that confirms my belief on why man and women simply can't be friends when attraction is involved....whether in a relationship or even as an ex.

 

DONT let her back in your life. Thats a typical liar/cheater. I heard all the same BS lies for months and believed them out of stupidity. In the end everything i felt in my gut was right, unfortunately for me, i was strung along for many months and went through a lot of pain before it finally ended. If you know you dont want to be with her, then dont even try.

 

Thanks guys...

[Mustachio]

I guess the question here is... what do you really want? You seem like you are in a good enough place to be friends, but i question that for the simple fact that you are here asking this question.

 

So, lets assume you want to just remain friends, in that case, what does it matter what she is up to? Friendships like relationships can only go as far as each individual person is willing to take it. So you have the power here to take this only as far as you want. And after the lying she did, do you trust her? Personally it would be hard for me to maintain a friendship with someone I dont trust, let alone even consider moving it beyond that.

 

And as everyone else has said, sounds like a rough patch and she is putting out feelers again.

[Snowy]

I guess the question here is... what do you really want? You seem like you are in a good enough place to be friends, but i question that for the simple fact that you are here asking this question.

 

So, lets assume you want to just remain friends, in that case, what does it matter what she is up to? Friendships like relationships can only go as far as each individual person is willing to take it. So you have the power here to take this only as far as you want. And after the lying she did, do you trust her? Personally it would be hard for me to maintain a friendship with someone I dont trust, let alone even consider moving it beyond that.

 

And as everyone else has said, sounds like a rough patch and she is putting out feelers again.

 

Well...what I WANT..in a nut shell is:

 

1. I definitely don't want a proper relationship with her.

2. I would like to keep friendship.

3. Sex. (But I would never get this unless we have a proper relationship)

 

Ahh, I guess I'll just ignore the flirting and try to keep things down within the friendship level.

 

ALSO: While I definitely do not trust her as my girlfriend, I don't give a crap if I trust her or not in a friendship. This is because our friendship doesn't involve a deep and meaningful connection. We stay friends to help each other with school mainly. Our conversations never get beyond anything too meaningful.

[nattpanter]

People want what they can`t get for some sick reason...Im shure her woman-radar is picking up your non-willingness to get back together...

[Mustachio]

So you are saying your friendship doesnt mean as much to you as say... a real friendship? So you are acquaintances only because of school. Regardless of what level your friendship is at, it does not sound like you are too overly invested in this friendship, so whether she is truly making any advances to get back together with you should really not be any concern of yours.

 

Okay, you want sex, I get that, but I think you are well aware that sex with your ex is only going to lead to problems. You can get sex from others without bringing in baggage like that and possibly find something that would be much more meaningful.

[Oasiswater]

Trust me dude.

I went through the same thing you did, with the lying and lack of trust. The night she broke up with me last year, she told me, "Stop being so worried about other people. Im doing this for ME, not for anyone else!" Less than 10 days later she was sleeping with a new guy. That kinda person is not someone you want in your life. I know you say you want sex, but I made that mistake too.. I let her back into my life as friends, just for sex, but once that physical bond starts going again, your emotions are going to creep up on you again. It's best to follow everyone else's advice and just let that go. It's not worth it. Stay as far away from this girl as you can. She's so wishy washy, she doesn't even know what she wants right now.

[Snowy]

Alright thanks guys