MEE123 Posted May 16, 2011 Share Posted May 16, 2011 I was dating this guy for round about two years on and off. I dumped him several times because he was a crappy boyfriend, and I'm so serious; he talked trash about me to his friends, was two-faced, never took me out on an actual date, no follow through, stole my car, etc,. Okay, so last year we got back together and stayed together for about two or three months. I was paranoid the whole relationship that he was going to cheat on me and he was getting pissed off at me. So, he dumps me for being "too emotional." Btw, does anyone have any idea if he just got back with her to hurt me? Or does he just not give a * * * * about either of us? I don't know how to move on. Please someone help me. Link to comment
Edmund Exley Posted May 16, 2011 Share Posted May 16, 2011 Nobody can answer that but him. Link to comment
MEE123 Posted May 17, 2011 Author Share Posted May 17, 2011 i feel like an idiot. i shouldn't even be asking these questions, but I just don't know how to be apathetic. I feel like my life is still revolving around my ex. Link to comment
endy Posted May 17, 2011 Share Posted May 17, 2011 I feel like he is never going to be happy until he starts to control his anger and emotions. Same with you. You don't not love this person. This person does not love you. The reason that I say this is because all of those messages are filled with anger and hate. It's obvious what you both feel is a want and a desire. This is not even a relationship that you described. Why are you stuck on him at all? All I see inside of you is anger. I'm sorry that you suffer so much. Please take the time that you have to work on yourself and grow as a person. Do not get stuck on this, do not get angry anymore. Do not deal with him at all. Anger breeds more anger especially when we react to it like you have been. It doesn't make the situation better. It makes the situation worse. I don't think you were a rebound. I don't think he really takes his life and relationships seriously. I think what he does is selfish and this person does not know how to love himself. When we don't love ourselves how can we possibly love someone else? On and Off relationships never work out. Nobody changes, it's just going back to the same thing over and over. Please take time away and do some growing as a person. What I saw in this post by looking and listening deeply was a lot of anger, jealous, and no compassion. This is not healthy. It appears that you are not happy with yourself. I would just worry about that for the time being. Link to comment
MEE123 Posted May 17, 2011 Author Share Posted May 17, 2011 I don't know why I'm stuck on him. I'm an idiot.. I guess you're right I am jealous in some ways. I just want him to love me and for me to love him and for everything to work out! LOL. I think you're right on just about everything you said.. I think I'm young and I've got to grow up, but I'm just struggling with letting go. I feel like any relationship I get involved in will just be a mess.. P.S. He replied with "Youre a trip kid lol" ..................... Seriously? Sorry, maybe I'm too young to be posting on these forums. I guess I'll just try to ignore him, but honestly ignoring him doesn't really seem to do me any good. My feelings are still there even after seven months! How does one let go? I'm afraid of going back home because I'm afraid I'll fall back into the same patterns. How do I prevent this from happening. & I apologize in advance for throwing all my issues on whomever reads all my crap. : / Link to comment
endy Posted May 17, 2011 Share Posted May 17, 2011 It is ok and honestly if you stick around for awhile and just read... It doesn't matter how young you are. It's a good place to learn and grow from example. There are some very wise people on this forum. How old are you just out of curiosity? It's never too early to start learning from your relationships. If you are that young don't sweat it. Seems a lot like childish games to me, but that's normal if you are that young. Link to comment
endy Posted May 17, 2011 Share Posted May 17, 2011 Oh dear, You have all the time in the world to meet someone and be happy. Do not sweat this guy. Like you said it's on again and off again. You're dealing with a sammie and ronnie situation here lol. I can tell you that they speak of loving each other. They have no idea what love really is. I think the same goes for you right now, but you'll learn and grow over time. Hell just go out and have fun! I had no clue what love was at that age either. I think it's more of a case you want something right now that you can't have. No worries... Try reading this guide here... link removed Link to comment
Hollyj Posted May 17, 2011 Share Posted May 17, 2011 "I was dating this guy for round about two years on and off. I dumped him several times because he was a crappy boyfriend, and I'm so serious; he talked trash about me to his friends, was two-faced, never took me out on an actual date, no follow through, stole my car" I don't understand!!!!!!!!! This guy treated you like crap and stole your car, and your still talking to him? What do you get from this, you must not care much about yourself? Time to find some self-respect! Lastly, It doesn't matter if you were the rebound or not, you allowed this guy to treat you badly. That's all that should matter. Link to comment
MEE123 Posted May 17, 2011 Author Share Posted May 17, 2011 I guess i'm just looking for answers.. and I kind of just wish he had fully moved on and wasn't sitting there playing with my feelings. I know I'd be able to move on if him and his other ex stayed together. It'd hurt a little sure, but noo instead he just comes back ready to jump back into things? * * * is that? Wth wth. Talking about memories and "you should call me sometime" It just pisses me off, it really does and I just want to know why. So what then, does he want me back? And if so then what about his other ex? Does he want her too? Idk. I just feel tangled up inside and angry. Is he just crawling back because she dumped him or cause he's not getting any from her? IDK! Link to comment
MEE123 Posted May 17, 2011 Author Share Posted May 17, 2011 Also, thanks for the guide lol : D Link to comment
Hollyj Posted May 17, 2011 Share Posted May 17, 2011 I guess i'm just looking for answers.. and I kind of just wish he had fully moved on and wasn't sitting there playing with my feelings. I know I'd be able to move on if him and his other ex stayed together. It'd hurt a little sure, but noo instead he just comes back ready to jump back into things? * * * is that? Wth wth. Talking about memories and "you should call me sometime" It just pisses me off, it really does and I just want to know why. So what then, does he want me back? And if so then what about his other ex? Does he want her too? Idk. I just feel tangled up inside and angry. Is he just crawling back because she dumped him or cause he's not getting any from her? IDK! What answers do you want? he treated you badly! What else do you need to know? You are allowing him to play with your feelings by remaining in contact. Why aren't you blocking this guy? This guy proved to you in the past that he doesn't care about you, why would you even entertain him. By the way, he is only doing this for attention. You are not looking at the big picture! He is not relationship material. Move on! Link to comment
Oneironaut Posted May 17, 2011 Share Posted May 17, 2011 He is not relationship material. Move on! I second this, wholeheartedly. Link to comment
endy Posted May 17, 2011 Share Posted May 17, 2011 I guess i'm just looking for answers.. and I kind of just wish he had fully moved on and wasn't sitting there playing with my feelings. I know I'd be able to move on if him and his other ex stayed together. It'd hurt a little sure, but noo instead he just comes back ready to jump back into things? * * * is that? Wth wth. Talking about memories and "you should call me sometime" It just pisses me off, it really does and I just want to know why. So what then, does he want me back? And if so then what about his other ex? Does he want her too? Idk. I just feel tangled up inside and angry. Is he just crawling back because she dumped him or cause he's not getting any from her? IDK! Yeah, the problem is YOU are letting him play with your feelings. You are letting him walk all over you. You really want to be his sloppy seconds. I'm going to tell you something important... Women need to have boundaries too. You never ever let someone treat you this way. People that act like this, jumping from relationship to relationship are insecure. They constantly need someone else to make them happy. They can't love you the right way. They search for an ideal love... that "in love feeling" When it doesn't last they run to the next person. In other words they have the wrong idea of what love actually is. You need to love yourself before you can love anyone else the right way. Honestly start trying to work on yourself. Don't even worry about this jack ass anymore. He wants you back because she doesn't want him anymore most likely. DO NOT be his sloppy seconds. It's a game, and it's only going to hurt you. He left once, he will leave again. He's garbage, move on and don't look back. Delete his number, everything gone. Just follow that guide, and you'll be ok. If you do go back, you are giving up all of your power and your self worth. Don't do that to yourself. You're too young to make this a habit in relationships. If you can do NC and get through it you will be much stronger in your future relationships. Link to comment
MEE123 Posted May 17, 2011 Author Share Posted May 17, 2011 Yeah, I guess you're right. I just have problems with always asking irrelevant questions and getting stuck on bad situations. I already blocked him once and think it would be childish to do it again.. right? So THAT'S why he's doing that?! Messed up, lol. No no, you're right. I'm not.. I guess I just needed to hear it from someone else. Thank you Link to comment
endy Posted May 17, 2011 Share Posted May 17, 2011 You're welcome. If it's easier for you to move on and forget him... Block everything. Delete from facebook. Delete his number. Let it all go. It's the best thing for you right now. It's hard, but it's the right thing to do IMO. Link to comment
Hollyj Posted May 17, 2011 Share Posted May 17, 2011 Yeah, I guess you're right. I just have problems with always asking irrelevant questions and getting stuck on bad situations. I already blocked him once and think it would be childish to do it again.. right? So THAT'S why he's doing that?! Messed up, lol. No no, you're right. I'm not.. I guess I just needed to hear it from someone else. Thank you Blocking is actually the mature thing to do, as you're looking after yourself. Stop making excuses to stop communication, or you will continue to be this guy's doormat. Link to comment
MEE123 Posted May 18, 2011 Author Share Posted May 18, 2011 Blocking is actually the mature thing to do, as you're looking after yourself. Stop making excuses to stop communication, or you will continue to be this guy's doormat. Well good then because I did block him and his ex, just so I can't stalk his stuff anymore.. I feel a little relieved. Thanks for the support all of you guys : D Link to comment
Hollyj Posted May 18, 2011 Share Posted May 18, 2011 Well good then because I did block him and his ex, just so I can't stalk his stuff anymore.. I feel a little relieved. Thanks for the support all of you guys : D Don't answer his e-mails or phone calls, either. Be good to yourself! Good luck! Link to comment
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